That is the quote i was borrowing from, coco :)
How do you deal with people who do not like you?
I thought so, Morpheus. Good one.
Great minds run in the same ditch!
Morpheus —“ Peoples opinion of me is none of my business.”
Coco: "Never explain yourself, your friends dont need it & your enemies will never believe it!"
Perhaps Paul is confounded by a thing that puzzles all of us from time to time: The moment when we discover that a person we felt was in our “friend camp” is not. In fact we are shocked to learn they are hostiles. Enemies.
Friends are those to whom we talk freely. From whom receive free comment, occasional questions, often support—at the very least —respect.
When a person of my acquaintance—one whose goodwill l had no reason to doubt— shows a readiness to harm me, l readjust. But I do not castigate myself for having thought them a friend.
Afterward l will maintain a buffer in my mind from this person who thinks badly of me. I do not try to engage them —even reasonably because there is a saying that is very true:
“Ill will never spoke well.”
There is a lot of good advice here.
I do think for JW’s it can be difficult figuring out authentic interactions since WTBTS programming discouraged emotional honesty.
I wasn't a JW long at all but the friend arena can be a crap shoot. I've certainly been in shock mode/lockup a few times the past couple yrs., especially this past weekend. I've enjoyed this topic and keep looking for the perfect answer for my own drama -- I know the answer but have no respect for reality. Guess we have to put up with negative drama to socialize with others. I use to hear it takes years to establish a true friendship and know someone's values, ethics, etc., (and I believe it!) or heard many women say they wanted no close friends because time element and heartaches, but I don't want to believe it.
What about nosey people who will try to get into your home to see what you have -- want to go shopping and watch what you look for or purchase. I never make purchases with someone along -- fun when a teenager. I think friendships make relationships look easy. I do have couple of life-long, childhood, friends -- guess we accept one another because of the history but don't live in same cities, states. One has to have zip code/area code/whatever, friends, too.
_Morph -- you answered it. I had a hunch you were above all this people-negative drama and ignored it.
"Never explain yourself, your friends don't need it & your enemies will never believe it!"
That was really true in my case. When I quit JW, I tried hard to explain the TTATT to my JW friends. They never beleived anything I said, except labeling me as apostate and Evil.
I never had anything to explain to my old Non JW friends as to Why I quit.