Sisters with Unbelieving Mates got to fellowship with other Sisters with unbelieving Mates. I remember being told all the time how I was such an encouragement to the congregation for remaining so loyal and being so regular at the meetings and out in service. Problem was, that was about the only way I ever got any association by anyone other than "my own kind". I can only speak for the sisters with unbelieving mates because that was my experience.
I remember telling an elder once that I was so tired of being told what an encouragement I was to the congregation, and if I heard it one more time I thought I might scream. The look on his face was priceless. When he asked what I meant by that, I told him that I did not care to be an encouragement to the congregation. I was in a lot of emotional pain and needed some heavy enouragement. My children were spiritual orphans, but since they had a worldly father, no one wanted to step on any toes, so they were ignored.
Being in a divided houselhold is it's own kind of hell. I was not close to my husband, because he was not a witness and was going to die at armageddon so why get close, but I was not real close to most in the congregation because they did not want to associate with my husband, not only because he was an unbeliever, but also had drug and alcohol problems. My oldest son had a severe case of preachers kid syndrome as he hit his teenage years. Major bout of juvenile delinquency with further distanced us from the congregation. My younger son got lost in the shuffle. And I continued to get lip service.
There was a time that the elders thought that it would be encouraging for me to be of help to one in the congregation who needed transportation for her and her son since she and I lived in the same apartment complex. Heck of it was, she was disfellowshipped at the time.
Ok, I am rambling here so I will stop. But for what it is worth, this is my experience as part of a divided household.
Blessings to all