I've Lost My Faith (page 2)

Shakita

Jst2laws,

Thanks for the great post. I too have lost my faith in the organization. I will have difficulty ever trusting another person again. The WT had all the answers for us in a world that is often sinking in confusion. Everything was put together in neat little packages so that we didn't have to think using our own brain. We were given the assurance that we would never die and that our loved ones would never die. Those loved ones that we lost in death we would see again in the resurrection.

We were totally lost in a delusion of the WT's making. We were assured that the individuals running the organization were being directed and run by God. So, why worry? Waking up from the Watchtower machinations was like waking up from a coma after being asleep for 25 years. You discover, much to your horror, that the whole world has passed you by and that you have a lot of catching up to do.

There is no going back for me. I feel completely betrayed and victimized. I have sucker stamped on my forehead. I spent 25 years slaving away for pompous jackasses, concerned only with their self aggrandizement and not concern over the so called sheep in their midst.

Out of the ashes of the WT a new found faith is emerging. I'm taking it slowly because I'm not in a hurry. I don't want a repeat of my WT experience. To those that are lurking here, if you don't want a lifetime of pain and heartache, you better run like there is no tomorrow away from the WT.

Mr. Shakita

mouthy

I agree with every thing you said. But one thing you have to thank the WTower for iS----YOUR LOVELY WIFE!!!!!!!

jst2laws

Lyineyes,

I think I know how you feel. Well behind me and my losses is about a year of depression, but the grim reality is that some take years to get out of this phase.

I have only been out a little over a year, and I am working on trying to find what I beleive and I am working on getting my faith back. I guess it is just something that will come in time, but I havent lost every bit of my faith I guess, because somewhere deep down , I feel something is there.

All I will say now is you will not find something to replace the WT. That kind of faith WAS an illusion. But yes, there is something there, and you will be satisfied spiritually if you keep looking, providing you are not looking for the wrong thing.

Take care, and hope to meet you and the family some day soon.

Hello again Makena1,

Looking forward to seeing you again too. How about April?

Jst2laws

jst2laws

Hello Brummie,

how painful it can be to lose that worthless kind of faith and how our loyalty towards these men is sometimes stronger than our ability to let go of them. How can something so empty have us holding on to it with both hands? Its like we were grasping nothing and refusing to let it go

Well put. Maybe it is easier to let go when we fill our hands with something worthwhile. For me it has taken a conscious effort to search and find something worthy and it has been gratifying. This confuses the local JW's because they expect us to be 'gnashing' our teeth. If only they had the courage to peak at the evidence.

Thanks for your comments, Brummie

Parousia,

My Mom said she's afraid to talk about it because it could mean "life or death" to her. They are held captive by fear.

Wow! You are right. Most are even afraid to THINK about it.

Jst2laws

Englishman

Jst2laws,

I can relate to loss of faith, and also to doubt about the existence of god. I think there is something greater than that though, it's not as if God would be any more or any less real as a result of our believing in him.

I do believe that there is a certain spirituality to be found out there, a certain goodness within also that can emerge after we have left the confines of rigid belief.

Depression may well be the price of acheiving this spirituality. At the end of the day, depression is an "apartness" or separation sensation. Sometimes we have to go through this in order for us to recognise just how separated we have become from our own true selves. Only when we recognise this can we begin to move forward and rediscover what we really are.

Englishman.

jst2laws

Hey Ashitaka,

Aren't you the son of a friend of mine?

Mulan,

I lost all faith, in religion, in God, in all of it, when the WT crumbled in my mind and heart. Gradually some faith is coming back...............but it's still hazy for me.

They had become the "masters of our faith" and what you experienced is what keeps a lot of thinking Witnesses from stepping too far. The scared-to-death witness sees emptiness and total loss in challenging the question "where else are we to go" (Wt corruption of Peter's question "to Whom else are we to go). We took the plung and went through the agony, but only because the 'Masters' had caused us to put complete faith in them.

And yes, I will give a big hug to Joy. Thanks Mulan.

BigRed,

I often gave a public talk on the trinity and made the point that trinitarians "had relegate the father to near obscurity behind the shadow of the son". But it did not occure to me that I had been pushing Jehovah and the Organization to the point that Jesus had been relegated to near obscurity remaining only as a "name we attach to the end of our prayers". Christians are Christians, not Jehovahians. What happened to Jesus??

Jst2laws

Valis

jst2...greetings sir..long time no see. I just wanted to add that even if you lose your faith in dog there is something more important than that. With the short and delicate lives we live I find that my faith in humanity is much more important than faith in a religion. People in religions tend to give up humanity for faith in things like the bible and the concept of some father figure in the sky, which inevitably leads to discarding the good in others not of their own kind. Find solace in the fact that you know there are good people and the righteous man will prevail over the inhumane one every time. Love to your fam from the Texas Branch....BTW give joy a real good pinch for me...its been too long.

Sincerely,

District Overbeer

jst2laws

I see I'm getting behind and will not catch up so I apologize to any I do not respond to personally.

Shakita,

There is no going back for me. I feel completely betrayed and victimized. I have sucker stamped on my forehead. I spent 25 years slaving away for pompous jackasses, concerned only with their self aggrandizement and not concern over the so called sheep in their midst

Well said. "Betrayed and victimized". And to varying degrees damaged.

Out of the ashes of the WT a new found faith is emerging. I'm taking it slowly because I'm not in a hurry. I don't want a repeat of my WT experience.

Very encouraging. Thanks

Mouthy,

But one thing you have to thank the WTower for iS----YOUR LOVELY WIFE!!!!!!!

My wife and good people here like you, thanks.

Jst2laws

ozziepost

You've got it right, Just2Laws!

There's a world of difference between faith in an organisation and spiritual faith.

Cheers, Ozzie

jst2laws

Englishman,

I do believe that there is a certain spirituality to be found out there, a certain goodness within also that can emerge after we have left the confines of rigid belief.

That is a key, provided we do not get stuck in the negative phase of growth such as bitterness or anger. Even if that happens it does not define a person but may point to a need for help in getting through the healing process. Yes, my friend, you are an example of "goodness within..that can emerge after we have left the confines of rigid belief".

I also agree with your thought about the process of growth and depression being part of it.

Valis,

People in religions tend to give up humanity for faith in things like the bible and the concept of some father figure in the sky, which inevitably leads to discarding the good in others not of their own kind

I agree, "people in religion" do this. Religion seperates people just as nationalism and racism, and prevents us from acknowledging the "good in others not of our kind". If we could just live the life that Jesus lived and accept all people as he taught without judgement, love everyone (even our enemies) there would be no "discarding the good in others not of their own kind". Don't you agree?

It has been a long time hasn't it. Greetings from the Florida Branch.

OZZIE and ISP

Good to hear from you both.

Onacruse,

I had to think about you post for a while. I don't know! Do you really think all of our belief was credulity? We certainly looked credulous when most of us fell for the 1975 thing, and I feel like a fool having passed judgement on people as an elder while knowing not even Jesus would judge the prostitute. But I thought the BOYS had "demonstrated" to me that God was directing us: We were preaching world wide, only not the good news of Jesus, we did have an international brotherhood, I just didn't know this was true of many cults too, ect.

I dont know, Maybe that was credulity too.

Jst2laws

Edited by - Jst2laws on 2 February 2003 22:16:32

Edited by - Jst2laws on 2 February 2003 22:19:25

I've Lost My Faith

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