Help the Elders are after me!!!!!!!!

by auntiem 35 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  SwordOfJah

  Hi auntiem, I think it was inappropriate for the elder to show up alone at your door. Was he there on a shepherding call? Dressed the way you describe it, I doubt it. Is he a close friend of the family? Still it would be inappropiate to show up alone knowing that your husband is not at home, but it could explain his thinking.

  I think that the visits that the elders are scheduling between January and March are not to get you to disassociate, but to help inactive Witnesses to become publishers again. They might encourage those inactives ones to accept a bible study once again to strengthen their faith. No one should be scared of the elders. If they are taking the time to visit inactive ones, then that is proof that they are concerned and remember those that have left the flock. Of course, it's still your right to accept or deny a visit. But try to avoid a confrontation. I have found that sitting down to talk over a hot cocoa or coffee goes along way in clearing up differences.

  I hope you are there to receive the elder once he comes around again, of course only if he's accompanied by another elder, if alone it's better not to open the door. Try having a calm, rational conversation with them without attacking or being on the defensive. Looking up scriptures and talking spiritual matters never hurt anyone. I hope you have a good day.
• 

  Crazy151drinker

  if alone it's better not to open the door

  Why? Are they getting tired of molesting little kids and want to move into the big leagues?
• 

  metatron

  Bull$hit Alert!!!!!

  Given the depth of raw, unchecked corruption in the organization today, you have every
  reason to be afraid of the elders. Don't listen to fawning shills who say otherwise.
  
  Don't answer the door. If approached, say you don't feel like talking about it.

  metatron
• 

  auntiem

  Thanks everyone for all of your input it is very much appreciated. I can't believe that I still have that "submissive sister" bullcrap in my system. I thought I had shed most of that this past year. Evidently not. I need to change the way I am viewing this B;org. its unsettling to think that my outward actions don't match my inward feelings about the WT. Gosh will this bad feeling ever go away? Will I ever be able to look at an elder and think this is a man and nothing more and he means nothing to me, or am I going to always cringe like a mouse thats been caught by a cat before? Damn it!

  Ok Pepper I am going to stand in front of the mirror and practice saying Phuck U Bazturds!!!!!!!!!!

  Hugs To All!

  aUnTiE M
• 

  Stefanie

  It doesnt matter what they want. What matters is that she doesnt want them there! Its her house her property and she has every right no to have them come in and discuss what probably will get her upset. They teach about the prodigal son. Then shouldnt they wait for people who want to come back, come to them? Obviously if a person hasnt gone back there is a reason. And they should be left alone.

  "Dont be afraid of Elders"

  I knew a few who were pervs. Porno addicts! They arent as innocent as they look. And people get shocked when they get DF or they "step down". If the watchtower exposes catholics and other religons on thier misconducts, they should be fair and mention what they themselves have in thier pockets!
• 

  ESTEE

  Dear Auntiem,

  Sounds to me like only one elder is after you, dahlin' . . . and not in a healthy way. . . I think he is at your door for his own ulterior motives.

  What Beans says sounds logical to me, namely if you send a DA letter, they will shun you . . . better to just disappear into the woodwork.

  My advice? . . .

  • Just don't be home,
  • Just don't answer the door,
  • If you have call display on your phone, just don't answer their calls.

  I think it was in poor taste to call on you in his sweats. I think it was tacky for him to call alone, and especially when your hubby wasn't home. I like roybatty's and benext's suggestion about a letter of complaint. If you do choose to write a letter of complaint about his inappropriate conduct, remember you are under no further obligation to explain . . . so continue to ignore their phonecalls and any other attempts to contact you.

  I personally think he was at your door for sex.

  Take care,

  Love,

  ESTEE
• 

  wednesday

  Auntiem,

  i am going to offer a suggestion.U said, i believe, that i were not ready to DA yourself. Ok. If u say F**k U to the elder, most certainly that will result. If u do not caare, then go ahead,it will feel great.

  But , if you'd rather stay in on your own terms for a while,another approach might be better. First, i see a GOLDEN OPPROTUNIITY here. The elder screwed up right form the start.He showed up in jogging clothes at our home when u were alone. big time NOT OK.then he preceds to make an apt . Call the local cong. or the WTS and tell them that the man, use his name, stopped by your home , alone, in jogging clothes, and wanted to come in.tell them how firghtned u are(no lie u are)CRY, get emotional. u are a woman alone and it really scared u. i GUARNETEE SOMEONE WILL CALL THIS BOZO AND CALL HIM ON THE CARPET.See, he has given u the perfect opprtunity to throw up a smoke cloud. it is sort of like a police officer arresting someone without reading them their rights. He just blew his case. So has this elder. He has so scared u, and when the PO gets through chewing him out, i doubt they will bother u ever. Not with the implication of violation of your rights and scaring u, and the big one all elders are afraid of, , or being accused of being improper with a female. So, u now have carte blanche to stop these guys in their tracks and probably they will be so afraid of the way it could be precieved by outsiders(with all the sexual scandal and all). If u have a husband, say how angry he was someone stopped by alone .

  Frnakly, i would not even meet with them if 2 elders came, not if i was alone.

  If u play this right, his as* is grass and they will be very afraid to call agian.
• 

  ashitaka

  Buy a taser and shock them accordingly if they try to harass you....just tell the cops that they wouldn't leave your property. Put up No Tresspassing signs that say WILL TASER ON SIGHT. That would certainly make things interesting.

  ash
• 

  outnfree

  AuntieEm,

  I was just recounting at a meet-up last weekend how after I'd hand-delivered my DA letter to each elder's home (and for those I could not contact left envelopes pinned to the KH information board) I STILL agreed to a meeting at the Kingdom Hall with the elders and THEN STILL agreed to give it another month at the elder's request.

  I walked out of that three hour meeting feeling as you do now: Upset with my Sister Submissive to the Elders attitude when I was very clear, internally, that I was DONE with the whole organization. I came to my senses less than four days later, but still.... just goes to show what a good job of conditioning we r&f's underwent. LOL The damn elders had ME feeling sorry for shocking THEM with my DA letter!

  I'm with those who say the elder's actions were inappropriate, reportable, and give you a perfect reason to STAY AWAY even longer now. Write the letter playing up how uncomfortable you were/are. And don't communicate verbally with anyone. If cornered in public "I don't feel comfortable discussing this now." is all you need to say.

  Happy Fading!

  outnfree
• 

  out4good3

  Or...do what I did.....

  The last time a bunch of elders showed up at my door, I loudly yelled "GO AWAY!!!!!!"

  Haven't seen them since.