How do you do laundry?

by hannibal 30 Replies latest social current

  • hannibal


    My wify has been gone for two weeks, and I,m running out of skivies. I havnt done laundry in years, anybody! Hot/ cold/ colors/ whites- i'm lost.

  • simplesally

    1) Take it to your mother's

    2) Go to

    3) Throw it in all together and never worry about separating laundry again!

  • NeonMadman

    Separate white items from light colors from dark colors. If you have any really delicate items, wash them separately in the "delicate" cycle.

    Load the washer so that it's reasonably full, but not squashed down.

    Read the label on the detergent to see how much to use for a load. These days, with most major detergents, the cap doubles as a measuring device.

    If you want to bleach the whites, the bleach bottle will usually tell you how much to add for a load.

    Most modern washers have a dispenser for softener; again, refer to the bottle to find out how much to put in, but a capful is a good rule of thumb. If severely in doubt, you can get by without the softener.

    I assume you know how to operate the actual machines; if not, they tend to be self-explanatory, or else refer to the manual.

    If it doesn't work out, buy new clothes and throw the old ones away.

  • caligirl

    Throw it all in the wash, use cold water and you should be fine with everything in one load, unless you have something new and red, in which case you will be sporting pink socks and BVD's.

    (Caligirl is of the "mostly too busy to separate laundry" class)

    Of course, your other option is to take yourself shopping for a few new packages of underoos and worry about the dirty ones later!

  • Sargon

    Throw it in a big pile until your wife comes back. Otherwise all your whites'll look grey like mine.

  • Scully

    You could try calling your wife and telling her "I love you and miss you so much. Can you come home sooner, I'm dying here without you."

    The caveat with this approach is that she is going to forking KILL you when she realizes you only wanted her home to do the laundry. Particularly if she's having fun where she is now.

    Love, Scully

  • Elsewhere

    1. Fill the bathtub with cold water
    2. Dump as many pieces of clothing into the tub as you can
    3. Drink a beer and watch the game for 30 min
    4. Go to the garage and get a boat paddle and laundry detergent - drink a beer
    5. Pour a WHOLE BUNCH of detergent in the tub with the cloths
    6. Stir the cloths and detergent with the boat Patel
    7. Get a beer
    8. While drinking the bear, get in the tub with the cloths and walk and scoot around to "agitate" the cloths.
    9. Get out and slip on floor busting your head on the edge of the sink
    10. Wake up 10 minutes later - get a beer
    11. Drain the water from the tub
    12. Walk around the tub to squish the water out of the cloths
    13. Get out - more carefully than last time
    14. Get the garden hose and spray the cloths down to remove the detergent - drink a beer
    15. Get back in the tub and walk around again to squish out the water
    16. Load cloths into large hefty bags and carry them outside - drink a beer
    17. Go in the garage and get the ladder - drink a beer
    18. Use the ladder to carry the bags of cloths to the roof
    19. Evenly spread the cloths out over the roof
    20. Get a beer and watch the game while the cloths dry
    21. Go outside to check on the cloths
    22. Find that the wind has blown the cloths all over the neighborhood
    23. Get the heafty bags and gather up the cloths
    24. Carry the bags of cloths back to the roof and leave them there - drink a beer
    25. Go and find some bricks, rocks, and scrap wood and carry them all to the roof - drink a beer
    26. Evenly spread the cloths back on the roof using the previous items to hold them down
    27. Get a beer and watch the game
    28. Go outside and check on the cloths... if not dry repeat #27
    29. When cloths are found to be dry gather them up in the hefty bags and carry them inside
    30. Put ladder back in garage - drink a beer

    Your laundry is now done in 30 easy steps!

  • hannibal


    Went to marthaStewart site found how to antique my own mirror and how to make candles. Just said I'm out of hear. The,'bring to moms' is a good one.

    Thanks Neon and caligirl!

  • hannibal


    I keep getting stuck on step #3!


  • blondie

    Do what I do, buy new underwear. I always have 3 weeks worth on hand. I hate doing laundry.


Share this