Single DF Sister Looking for Single DF Brother

by Honey 35 Replies latest social relationships

• 

  wasasister

  OK, on the off-chance this is legit...

  Why not take this opportunity to get to know some people outside the JW's? If you are open and non-judgemental, you will find there are many honest-hearted, good people out there.

  "Worldly" people are not all the godless, unhappy, dishonest, unfaithful, liars, and cheats we were taught to believe they were. It was a real eye-opener for me to find out how kind and tolerant "outsiders" were towards me once I gave them a chance.

  Most of them will be far more tolerant of your differences than you are of theirs.

  Best wishes with whatever you decide to do. However, as others have said, your selection is severely limited if you restrict yourself only to DF'd JW's. I suppose there may be other restrictions on your selection:

  • Age compatibility
  • Single
  • Employed
  • Number of/wanting/not wanting children
  • Geography
  • Hygiene

  ....to name a few.

  Good luck, Honey! It's hard enough finding compatible companionship.

  Wasa
• 

  Honey

  Xander:

  Gee, arent you a ray of sunshine!!

  I understand that I can be reinstated in 6 months, but that does not eliminate my present

  desire to have a relationship with someone and by relationship I am not talking about anything sexual. I also had never heard that DFd people could not associate with one another. I have been at the meetings, conventions, etc. and have seen DFd people interacting with one another so that is definitely news to me. As for my question being fake I would not even bother to waste my time or anyone elses.

  Trauma_Hound:

  I know that this severely limits my options this was a long shot and I figured that posting this message could not hurt.

  Wednesday:

  I was actually raised in as a Jehovahs Witness, so I know how the "friends" can be and I also know that many brothers will feel that a sister who has been disfellowshipped does not meet their criteria which is also part of my reason for posting this here.

  Wasa:

  I definitely believe that their are many wonderful, kind and loving people who are not JW - my sister actually married one about 3 months ago. But that is not what I am looking for, and while that may severely limit my options, I don't ever want to feel that I settled for something that I did not want.

  Honey

  Edited by - Honey on 27 December 2002 17:1:43
• 

  shera

  Honey good luck to you and I hope it all works out. Just remember that as a DFed person you aren't even allowed to speak to another DFed person yourself. If you were caught with someone DFed you would not be reinstated

  Thats the first time I ever heard that one! Gezzz ...all for control...even when the person is out,they still keep control!
• 

  shera

  BTW,honey.Take care and I hope things work out for you and you regain your happiness soon.
• 

  Trauma_Hound

  Honey, do you really want to go back to a religion that's based on a lie? I'm a third generation, ex-jw, I left, faded away, never dfed, or da'ed. If you look, you will see that what everyone here says is true. Just look at the history of the JW religion. Everything about the history, and it's association with the UN can be verified. It's a shame that a beautiful black woman, is limiting herself to a very small group of people. But then again I'm a little biased, I am white, but my ex-wife was black, and I think darker skinned women, are some of the most beautiful women in the world. What if a man crossed your path, and there was just a huge connection with him, but he happened to be worldly? It would be sad, not to be happy because of some man made dogma. Ask yourself this, where in the bible does it say that everyone out side of the JW religion is bad? Didn't jesus talk to hookers, tax collectors etc? There is good people everywhere. Do you want conditional love, or unconditional love? You won't get it being part of that religion, it's all based on conditional love. To me conditional love is very shallow.
• 

  wednesday

  Honey,

  if u saw df people socializing with othere df people, u are probably looking at jws who will never make it back.. I challenge u to talk to or better yet, WRITE THE SOCIETY and ask them if it is ok for u to date a df bro since u are df also. I have been jw all my life, and have been df at one time, and honey, the rules arent't getting lighter, they are getting stricter.Did u see the august KM on DF persons? check it out. I know, it seems like u should be able to associate with other df people, but not according ot the wts. really, check this stuff out.
• 

  Prisca

  I understand that I can be reinstated in 6 months, but that does not eliminate my present desire to have a relationship with someone and by relationship I am not talking about anything sexual.

  Girl, I don't know how old you are, but if you can't go for 6 months without having a relationship with a guy (sexual or non-sexual) then there is something wrong with you emotionally. Sorry to be so blunt but that's the truth.

  Use those 6 months to get to know yourself better. You obviously are lacking in something if you think you can't go without a male friendship for 6-12 months. I do suspect you are looking for a Df'd guy so you can get up to things that a JW guy would be worried of getting df'd for, but that's just my opinion.

  If you need male companionship that badly, get to know worldly guys. They're not as bad as you think.
• 

  observador

  Honey,

  welcome to the board!!!

  I did not realize that a DF'd person could not associate with another DF'd person - I thought that as long as they were not engaging in any wrong activity with one another there was no problem. Interesting...

  So who are you supposed to associate with? Or are you just supposed to spend all your time alone reading the bible?

  That's why we think you are in the right place. Here, one can get real insight into this cult religion. Not only that! Just look at the number of replies to your post and you'll see how many good and unbiased advices you get around here.

  If you haven't done that yet, give James a call; he's a nice "elder".

  Best wishes to you,

  Observador.
• 

  ballistic

  *wondering whether to post similar request for apostate mate*
• 

  jgnat

  Honey, you are wanting two opposing things at the same time. For your own mental health, you have to pick one.

  I understand that I can be reinstated in 6 months, but that does not eliminate my present desire to have a relationship

  First of all, let's assume you want, more than anything, to be a good Jehovah's Witness girl. Even if you do get reinstated in six months, you will not be marriagable material. You are probably looking at several years of dedicated service to be acceptable to a good brother. Besides, to be a good Jehovah's Witness girl, you should be putting away your temporal natural desires for a higher, purer, calling. Your statement is very selfish and self-centered. Worldly, in fact. You want your desires taken care of right now. After all, the New World Order is coming any day, and that is where your focus is supposed to be. And the fella has to be on the same midwave as you - disfellowshipped, but eager to go back.

  What if your primary goal is to have a meaningful relationship because you are painfully lonely? If that is your primary need, going back to the WTS is not going to help you. See above. If having a meaningful relationship soon is your primary goal, you may have to give up your desire to return. Again, expecting a fella to be on the same mindwave as you is pretty selfish. My honey and I have been together for three years now. I have become accustomed to his rhythms and habits, and he to mine. And believe me, he has some mighty strange habits. But no matter how much we are alike, he is still his own man with his own dreams. There are lots of great men out there, regardless of the status the WTS has given them. Why not concentrate on making friends, period, regardless of a person's supposed status? ....and let nature take its course.