Is this a discussion forum or a debating forum , which is it ?

by smiddy 51 Replies latest jw friends

  • wannaexit
    wannaexit

    Marvin said: I think at most we can hope to share good information and learn along they way. Sometimes what we learn is not what folks think was there to be learned, but it is learning nevertheless.

    Well said Marvin

  • Viviane
    Viviane

    And by the way, there is nothing formal or in the least bit professional or even mannerly, in the 'debates' that happen regularly on here.

    ...

    lol, Robert's Rules ...... I doubt if anyone reading this ever even heard of them.

    Assuming you meant Robert's Rules of Order, it's a guide for parliamentary procedure, not online discussion and, as such, contains guidelines (not rules) for obtaining the floor, speaking, ensuring everyone is using the same language and is on the same footing (i.e., not suggesting, as you did, that other people are stupid), making motions, etc..

    It's got nothing to do with online debate, debate teams, etc.

  • smiddy
    smiddy

    talesin has been a member of this board for 12 years ? Surely this outburst against Simon is way out of character for her .Maybe their is crap going on in her life that has got her down.I hope the two of you sort this out , I love this site and appreciate talesins posts , not that I agree with everything she says , however she has that right to say it , and so does Simon and the rest of us .Simon more so than the rest of us I guess because he`s the boss and I respect that.

    The reason I posted this topic was because subjects for discussion are often times taken over by 2 or 4 persons , and it just seems like a slanging match going on between them alone , and often even going off topic for umpteen pages.

    If I post a topic , I enjoy other peoples feedback ,I do learn a lot from that .On the internet I cant engage with everybodys input , I simply cant do it. Face to face , verbally, one on one ,  I can do it till the sun goes down , but on the internet ? no .

    Please give some of us old farts a break

    respectfully yours 

    smiddy

  • Simon
    Simon
    however she has that right to say it

    Excuse me but no, she doesn't.

    Lots of people have issues and things going on in their lives but most manage to be civil. I don't think it's a valid excuse and it's certainly an assumption to attempt to excuse someone's bad behaviour as is claiming it to be out of character (which I don't think it is). Why can't we just take something for what it is - an immature and childish outburst?

    Are people justified being rude and obnoxious to the girl on the supermarket checkout line because they may have had a stressful day at the office?

  • TerryWalstrom
    TerryWalstrom

    Marvellous Marvin says: That said, on forums like this worrying about persuading is a waste of time.


    I grok; I don't entirely agree for these reasons.

    New people who are damaged show up here and their capacity to tolerate less-than-diplomatic handling is a disservice to their condition. I'm not saying coddle. I'm not saying kiss any toosh.

    What is unique about showing up on a Discussion Forum like this?

    The ones who arrive have been rough-handled into waking up. The falsity of "Brotherly love" has left a mark. People are hurting, confused, vulnerable and defensive.

    Surely a bit of diplomacy is simple empathy, if not compassion.


    Now, as far as the rest of us rascals--no need to be diplomatic with us. We count

    scars as a badge of courage.

    Marvin's blog site is one of the finest, most useful locations on the Web because there is not debate, preening, trolling or pontificating. But, it isn't a discussion site.

    I think we could all be a bit more tender with the Newbies, if for no other reason, than because this is Triage.  Only a few will make it through the tunnel to daylight anyway.

  • Vidiot
    Vidiot

    smiddy - "Is this a discussion forum or a debating forum; which is it?"

    A little from column A, a little from column B.

    Either way, I'd say it's the most civilized XJW community I've seen yet.

  • Giordano
    Giordano

    Responsible and productive discussion and debate both require at least two essential things: presenting precise and challenging questions and answering precise challenging questions.

    However sometimes a question is used as a trap or weapon....... sometimes as an insult. That should be avoided by moving the debate along if possible....... instead of getting bogged down.

    There is still a lingering desire on the part of some to be 'right' above all else. Or to stay on the topic as if we are attending a WT study.

    In my experience, here and in private group discussions, one learns a lot more when the topic is allowed to evolve or expand organically. 

    Terry's point, by the way, is well made. We do encounter people on this forum who have been through or are still going through rough times. Unfortunately sometimes this forum can be a bit rough on it's own.



    h

  • MissFit
    MissFit

    I come here for the support.  I like Terry's description of a triage.

    What has helped me was reading other's experiences and realizing I wasn't alone.

    Just knowing others went through the same things, had the same feelings, in different countries even, really helped me.

    I would say this is a support site first. 

    Thank you to Cofty , who correctly noted that some discussions have made a difference.  The EPIC thread comes to mind.  That discussion really helped me analyze the difference between what I thought I knew and what was fact.


  • Ding
    Ding
    I prefer this to the Kingdom Hall, where everyone has to agree on everything and parrot back someone else's answers to their own questions...
  • Marvin Shilmer
    Marvin Shilmer

    "New people who are damaged show up here and their capacity to tolerate less-than-diplomatic handling is a disservice to their condition.... I think we could all be a bit more tender with the Newbies, if for no other reason, than because this is Triage.  Only a few will make it through the tunnel to daylight anyway."

    I don't disagree with that, and what you depict above is not what I was responding to. I was responding to "must" in your sentence saying "If you wish to be persuasive, you must be diplomatic." As I said before, I don't think that's always true (emphasis on "always"). I do not suggest what you say is never true (emphasis on never).

    There are lots of folks who need tender handling for all sorts of quite valid and understandable reasons. You articulate an example of that in the many JWs who happen upon this forum looking for help with what's ailing them. As you did above, with my early comments I too offered an example of what I was speaking of. Based on what you write above, I don't think you and I disagree.


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