Well, I guess it is time to share my story with you all. Most of the recent events in my life I have already shared in bits and pieces throughout various threads here on the JWD.
I am 47 years old and have one sister who is 44. We grew up in a religously divided household. My father was and still is a JW and my mother is still a devout Bible Student. I believe the label "Russelite was given to them by the WTS. My mother does not refer to herself as such. When we were young children my parents would share my sister and I in bringing us to their respective meetings. My mothers group was very small and consisted of mostly elderly ones. There were a few families that had children our age. All in all, there were about 30 people in her group in the entire area around where we lived in CT.
One week we would go with my mother. The next week we would go to the KH with my father. This went on for about 2 or 3 years. I was about 6 years old and my sister was 3-1/2 when this started. I did not like to go with my mother because it was very boring to me. They had a older girl who would teach a Sunday class in a back room for the few of us kids. They had a similar book to the Paradise book the JW's had. We studied in it. I don't remember what it was called but it was a drab grey colored book the exact size as the Paradise book. Our parents decided between them that my sister and I would attend both religeous group meetings and when we learned enough of each one, they would abide by the decision we made as to where we would go on a perminent basis.
This was very confusing to say the least. I ended up choosing the KH because there were more kids and I had more friends to choose from. I think my sister's reason was the same. We did go with my mother on occasion even after we decided to stick with the JW's.
I quickly became good friends with alot of the youth in the Cong. By my Teen years and High School 1969-1973, I was into the sex, drugs, and rock and roll scene. As Tink would say, " I was wilder than a bat". I was constantly in and out of committee meetings but only got my hand slapped because I did not get baptized until I graduated High School. The year I graduated I met a sister who I ended up marrying the following year. She was a regular pioneer and we both thought Armaggedon was coming in 1975. Well, that year came and went ....LOL, but each year that passed we said, "this will be the year that Armaggedon will come". We were both 18 when we got married. We both wanted out of our households and to be on our own and thats wy I think we got married, along with the 1975 thing.
I had become friends with a MS who was 8 years older than I was. My wife at the time did not like him too much. He had influenced me into heavey drinking as a way to stay away from drugs...LOL...how assanine is that! We also got involved with every activity that would allow us to be off away from home. Hunting trips, buisness trips( I seemed to follow him in employment where ever he went), Fishing trips....and so on. This is what lead to the breakdown of our marriage. I spent too much time away from home and so did this friend of mine, who is still married to the same women and still an elder and still a heavy drinker (the last I knew before1998). My wife at the time, was totally absorbed in the JW religion. She studied the same material over and over again for her different bible studies she had. Looked up all the scriptures which she knew by heart, over and over again. I asked her why she did that, Her answer was that the Circuit Overseer told them that each person is different and that you have to go over the material and find something specific to help the individual with. What a crock!! She always had at least 4 or 5 studies and with the five meetings, she was always studying all the time. I was always hunting, fishing, or something else. After about 10 years of this I finally caved in and applied myself enough to make MS. I always had parts of Assembly's in demonstrations but never really wanted to get to the point of becoming an elder. I stepped down as an MS after 5 or 6 pleas with the elders. I told them I needed to spend time trying to fix our marraige. They kept telling me not to step down, things would automatically fix themselves if we continued to strive in the troof. You know "Jehoooovahs Blessings". I finally just said, look I no longer want to be an MS and will stop coming entirely if that is what I have to do to get you guys to accept me stepping down. They finally let me go.
After that I started to miss meetings and get more invloved with everything else non JW related. Then we became friends with a newly baptised couple and I began to like the guy. His wife became a pioneer too, and my wife and I had someone we had things in common with. He and I took up SCUBA and we travelled together as couples to vacations in Aruba and Rhode Island and we even split the purchase of a time share in Aruba. Eventually, I guess do to us being so young getting married and the fact we really weren't in love, she got involved with this guy. He was know an MS. I had got wind of their romantic feelings on a couple occassions. Without divulging all the details, she finally told me around Dec of 1992 she wanted out of the marriage and confessed to having a relationship with who I thought was my friend. I was still friends with the Elder whom my wife never liked, and I started to rekindle our friendship again, which slowed some, after we met this new couple.
They both got DF'ed and we both got divorces. I began to get involved more with the JW religion ( I moved back home with my parents and wanted to help them). I started to get involved in building projects around my parents home. I built a garage and landscaped their back yard, I remodled their basement into an apartment for myself. I also got close to a someone who had a steel erecting business. We knew each other along time but were always in seperate Congs. Now we were together in the same Cong. I volunteered my spare time to work with him erecting buildings all over the state. Every weekend I was working with him. I had alot of fun and learned alot.
I really did not want to get into a relationship again and did not want to get married. I guess in the back of my mind I envisioned my ex and I getting back again. The MS she fell for dumped her after they got DF'ed. I just got sick of being around our area, and running into my ex at meetings and assembly's. She was working towards re-instatement and eventually did). So I decided to move South were the Elder who I basically followed everywhere had moved too. It wasn't too long after I moved in that Tink and I met. She was newly re-instated after being DF'ed and out for over 11 years. This Elder had called me in CT. before I decided to move south and told me about Tink. He said, "Boy do I have a prospect for you!!!..She is a FOX...." I said..." I'll be right down!!!!"....LOL. Actually it took a few months to move down south and when I got there I really was trying to avoid getting involved emotionally with someone, but when I saw Tink I knew I was done for!!! I introduced myself to her and another sister after one of the meetings. She gave me her card and told me to make an appointment with her if I wanted to get my hair cut. Tink is a liscensed Cosmoltogist and was working in a salon that was unisex. About 2 weeks later I get this call from her and she said, "WHY haven't you called me yet!!!????" I told her I was busy but promised I would call her back soon. Three days later she called again and said, " I'm not calling a third time, you PROMISED you'd call me..." I was so tickled by her manner of being so free and so bubbly and so sweet, that I called her back the next night, and then the next night, and the next...and we started to see each other without letting too many know. Tink was still going through a divorce and it wasn't final. This Elder and his wife tried to steer me away from Tink and introduced me to many other sisters. They didn't know this at the time but I already made my mind up that Tink and I were staying together no matter what! After a year of dating and going through Tinks getting divorced we made plans to wed. This Elder friend of mine agreed to perform the service. We had it at Tink's sisters home in Cookeville, Tn. She is not a witness. We had about 45 to 50 people there and it was a very beautiful wedding. Her sisters home is like a resort Hotel, it was the perfect setting for a wedding. We payed for everything and really appreciated the use of her sisters home.
After the wedding we settled back in and lived in Nashville for a few months before moving to where our parents lived. What began to tarnish my view of the Borg was the way Tink was being treated by people in our Cong, my Elder friend and his family, and some of Tinks JW siblings and friends she grew up with. It seemed that I didn't choose the right mate in their eyes and we noticed that we no longer got invited to gatherings activities. We began to try and fade out, but as you know from Tinks story and some of my posts the Borg Gestapo would noy let us do that.
We are both very happy and will never return to the Borg!
Sorry if this is too long, but it isn't even half of what I could relate. It just gives you all a background of where I came from and what I went through. Thanks for letting me get it out.
CC