by minimus 42 Replies latest jw friends
I wouldn't answer their questions, but would ask THEM questions. Such as: Why do you want to know? Where were you 7 years ago? That's a personal question, don't you think?
Do you consider me to be a member of the congregation? Why did you wait so long to call on me?
Do you consider me to be a member of the congregation? Then why are you here?
Do you consider me to be a member of the congregation? Then why are you here?
Been there, done that, Mulan. It would inevitably lead to just one result.
The result? DA
Cheers, Ozzie
this is like my biggest fear....i have only stood up to the elders once.
i am employed at 2 different places...it was christmas time...hubby
was gone with the brothers...i was working a double shift...days and
then all night...i left the trailor,,realized i had locked my keys
inside...
cold as hell,,,christmas eve,,,took forever to find some one home...
late for work,,,no cab service because it was christmas...ended up
calling the police begging for a ride..which they gave me....
got to work,,,no way to get home in the morning and no way to get into
the trailor...called my husband at the hoiday inn,,,,christmas gathering
of witnesses,,he got a ride back to town,,,with the co...hubby had
been mean before he left...so seeing him did nothing for my attitude...
they came in to my place of employment...there is only 2 of us in the
building,,,and i was alone on my end...and they just started on me...
i was very tired,,upset,,,ect ect...i asked them 3 times to leave me
alone,,,they did not....
so,,,i stood up and said i was going to call the police on them...i was
not joking and it showed...i repeated it,,and said they had 5 minutes
to leave the building and that i had the legal right to have them
removed from the premises....they left...
their conclusion? i am violent and mentally ill...it made my husband
look like a saint...he lies about me to them all the time and they
believe him....i went up against the elders,,,just this one time,,,
and i lost...you cannot win...
eventually they WILL come after me...i do not believe that they will
let me stay in hiding...time will have the answers to the rest of the story......
i did not mean to write a novel....sorry....i just started to vent...
not only do i not like elders,,,,i am afraid of them...very afraid...
they have power...and their power is not questioned...SHUDDER!!!!
Speaking from experience, I'd spit on him. I'd also go to the police and file harrassment charges, I wouldn't take any of their holier than thou attitude....
Ozzie, the elders in our area are pretty wimpy. I think it would work, if they were making an inquiring call on us. If they were sent by the "upper echelons", nothing works.
Obviously, judging from Bill and Barbara's experience, threats of attorneys and lawsuits does not deter them.
If the Elders went after me now, they would be about 21 years too late! Actually, I began to slide away as early as 1970, but went to just enough meetings and a few hours of door to door and ministry school just to keep in touch with family and friends. I had ceased believing their doctrines and their harsh disciplinary methods of df'g, shunning and rejection, having found so many inconsistencies, but was not emotionally strong enough to pay the high cost of letting go. I was very insecure and had very low self-esteem.
I didn't realize that by doing this to myself, living a lie, I was really harming my inner spirituality and damaging my soul. By the time 1980 rolled around, I still wasn't sleeping and had terrible nightmares, and my marriage was in turmoil. I was still trying to be a good person, but had stopped participating in the ministry school and door to door service and my meeting attendence was very sparce. I was killing myself slowly. I had to make a decision.
Finally, in 1981, I got off the merry-go-round. I figured if I didn't make a stand and begin to try to live my life true to my heart that I would just be a miserable, unhappy, and ill person for the rest of my life.
During all this time, nearly ten years, not one "call" was made on me by any Elder or any concerned brother. My mother was so angry at me for "not believing" that she was seeing to it that I was basically labeled and slandered unjustly, and so my "friends" were "not available" any longer. So much for Christian love and concern. She must have thought this was some type of "tough love????" I suppose. It wasn't until I wrote my own Disassociation letter to the congregation and to the headquarters of the WTBTS that I felt truly free. I never got any written response to either.
Shortly after they received my correspondence, four Elders did come to my home and I wouldn't allow them inside. I spoke to them in a very forthright, sincere, honest hearted manner on the front porch. They appeared to be very sad and ashamed of the way I had been treated, especially by my own mother. These are people that I had known since I was thirteen years old. When they left, two of them were crying. They told me that I was always welcome to come back and that "I knew where the truth was". That was it. I was never sent a letter calling me in for disfellowshipping. What could they disfellowship me for? And, there was no announcement made.
However, despite the fact that no announcement was publicly made, everyone shunned me and rejected me anyway. You would have thought that I was a heathen, or someone that had done a horrible, dispicable thing. I have always wondered about this. I blamed my mother and her friends for spreading malicious gossip throughout the congregation and turning my friends against me. When they shunned me in the grocery store or department store, and when they crossed the street to avoid passing me by directly, I knew that I was paying the price for my decision. However, I never once confronted any of them or put them on the spot. I just left them be. It was their choice--their loss. I just began to put the past behind me and move forward with a new directive...HEALING myself emotionally and physically. I have never once regreted my decision.
Karen
Edited to correct spelling
Edited by - Sentinel on 19 August 2002 11:57:26
If they want to bring a Bible to a gun fight, that is their problem! hehe
What would I do?..Fire up the BBQ and make room in the freezer..LOL...OUTLAW
Strip.
Lol @ SYN. That is even a better idea than mine!
