I've had doubts all my life, it's really hard to pinpoint when exactly they started. But being very young and told almost all the people on earth are going to be destroyed, and then looking around your classroom and imagining them getting eaten by crows, that does a number on you. How grotesque. I knew there were good kids there who didn't happen to be born witnesses and probably would never be. I knew this religion I was being brought up in was not normal, and I knew that there was crazy stuff in the world, and I thought wow, I guess my family is part of the crazy. Conversely, I always wanted to be a good kid and not make my parents sad about me. So I tried for a very very long time to go along with it. While doubting half the time and having faith the other half. But Evolution, Armageddon, the blood issue, the extreme stance on this natural thing called sex, all the name dropping, witness status worship, hatred towards general humanity, judgmentalism, modern day Pharisees, anti education....it eventually got to me and I could no longer 'make it work' anymore, since my own children were growing up and approaching baptism age. It was time to get out. Meetings during my fade started to get so unbearable I would read the bible straight through and in so doing found Christ. Then I really couldn't pretend anymore. There was a time limit to leave, I wanted to get out and join another church before rejecting Christ at the next memorial. My family is now free, Christmas is the best time of the year, and this freaking out about how to direct my kids on one very narrow little path to life is gone...they are making their own paths.