Question for Faders

by Daniel1555 18 Replies latest jw friends

  • phats
    phats

    BTW. With my fade I had a stroke of luck when my book study overseer (lazy git. I did all my stuff & half of his) was so lazy that he forgot to shepherd me about something that I didn't actually do.

    When I got the call from the 2 elders wanting to talk to me I asked them what about. They came round & explained the things that I was being removed for & said that this had all been explained buy my group study overseer. When I showed them this was not the case & that he had never come over at any time other than to watch the F1 Grand Prix with me they said that this was bad that nothing had been said as I should have been given a chance to comply. Then when they found out that there was nothing going on that was wrong & that they were mistaken they all looked rather embarrassed. Then when my study overseer was questioned he said that he had been to busy to talk to me about it even when he new it was going down when he came over to my house drinking my bear & watching the race with me.

    Then I was told that the letter had already been sent, returned, rubber stamped & that nothing could be done now even if it was incorrect.

    I was then told that he would be coming over (He never did) to apologise & say that if I carried on the same way that I had been for the last 15 years & not make a fuss about the wrong doing then I would be reinstated after the next CO visit.

    I said that I was fine with no longer serving but all I would ask was that when the announcement went out about me no longer serving that they could also state that a misjudgment had been made on my behalf.

    I reasoned with them that if they were going too make this announcement that some in the cong would wonder what it was that I had done & we have already agreed that I had done nothing wrong.

    Well this was met by an overwhelming "err no".

    I said that some brothers & sisters may wonder if I had been up to no good & as they couldn't stop the announcement that this would help me out.

    I was then told that there was no provision for this so in disbelief I started looking through all the literature (Nothing) & then I started looking on the eval internet & the rest as they say is history (Well for me anyway)

    The funny thing is they all new they cocked up & this gave me the perfect opportunity to bail & bail I jolly well did. Hurrah the the lazy buggers in my cong. there it was. An open door out & I was going to grab it with both hands,teeth, toes & whatever else I could muster up.

    All my relatives & family know about the cock up.

    What I was told though, was that in these cases the brother will be asked if he will open in prayer on the next sunday meeting & this will send out the unofficial word that I did nothing wrong so on the next Sunday I'm asked if I will open in prayer, I say yes of cause I would be happy to. I went up on to the platform said thank you Jehovah for everything you have done for us, said amen, got down, picked up my things & walked out with my bemused family following behind me.

    I've never been back & its just great!!!!!!

    Sorry for long post.

    Phats.

  • AlphaMan
    AlphaMan

    Phats.....good job on seizing the best opportunity to fade and running with it. Most people don't realize the best way to fade is too jump on an opportunity when the JW's cock up or when a person has something to really get offended over. JW's do not like to admit they were wrong, so in most cases the person will be allowed to fade and no one will bother them. On the rare cases where there is elder follow up....all the person has to do is still show anger over the cock up or being offended and the elders will soon leave. I had both a cock up and good reason to be offended. I was allowed to fade in 1995 with no one bothering me.

  • LoisLane looking for Superman
    LoisLane looking for Superman

    -----> Phats ... That was really funny. Personally, I have never heard of such a thing happening. lol Screw ups? In WTLand ? lol It makes me wonder though, why the Elder's didn't just sit on both letters, but instead chose to announce the one, then really mess with the congregation's minds by having you say Sunday prayer. I am thankful you got free and walked out.

    LL

  • Apognophos
    Apognophos

    That's an amazing story of bureaucratic thinking, phats. You normally only see that kind of dysfunction in large corporations. Amazing that the elders were unable to think of how to deal with the out-of-the-box situation. And they were also making their priorities clear in terms of following directions vs. showing love or consideration for you. As good a reason to leave as any, I'd say!

  • phats
    phats

    Thanks AlphaMan & Lois.

    It was like at the end of the film Midnight Express where the guy after all he's been through finds by pure fluke a gaping opportunity to just walk out was, I must say, one of the founding moments of my life.

    Hah! Anyway, yes. What a wheeze it was & one I will not be forgetting any time soon.

    Phats

  • disposable hero of hypocrisy
    disposable hero of hypocrisy

    Oh jolly good prayer sir!

  • dazed but not confused
    dazed but not confused

    Phats - Wow. Thats a great fade story. Thanks for sharing.

  • phats
    phats

    Thanks Guys,

    Lois, my understanding was that the letter had been sent, agreed upon, rubber stamped & returned.

    I didn't get the impression anything could be done to make a reversal. That's why I asked for the elders to make a breaf statment saying that there had been a miscarriage on my behalf but that was not going to fly so I flew instead.

    Rather pleased they didn't realy.

    Phats.

  • Franklin Massey
    Franklin Massey

    We moved, went to one meeting at the new hall (arrived right before the meeting, left quickly after), got the names and numbers of the Secretary and CoBE, sent those back to our old hall for a transfer of records and never went back. We got a few initial "we've missed you" phone calls from the two elders we met and one attempted visit to our home but otherwise, we've been left alone, are now officially inactive and enjoying the peace of mind.

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