Batman - check out the comments on the thread started by jonza to get some perspective on the risks of being a non-JW in a relationship with a JW - it will be even worse if you are viewed as an Apostate. In your situation, as others have said, unless she indicates that she also has serious doubts, you are best to walk away. Having a break to give her a chance to think it through makes sense. Fraz
Im new and need help!
Dear Vicki Vail (Batman's GF for you like-mindednereds) (or whatever her name is),
You indicated the last time we talked that I should take some time to figure things out. I have already 'figured things out' as it applies to the WT. I will never return to it. I love you and wish you well; if you figure things out about the WT, as have I and millioins of other former JWs, I would love to hear from you. Perhaps we can make things work. Good luck Vicki.
Walk away Renee
Unless the love of your life is in sync with you about this religion, staying with her will be hell.
DO NOT raise children in this cult. Get out while you still can. So glad to hear your parents are done with it.
Welcome to the forum! Congratulations on your family waking up with you.. That is very rare. I dont want to be insensitive but be HAPPY you did not marry this girl yet. I would KILL (joking) for the chance to be in your shoes but alas, I am married with two daughters to a fully in JW hardcore woman, two fanatical JW parents who eat sleep and breathe everything JW.
I know what its like to be in love, and how hard it is if it ends but marrying her would be the worst mistake of your life. you are 24 I am 25. Yet you have an unfettered future of possibilites and freedom ahead of you, For me it is not that simple. There are so many lovely, beautiful, sweet, loving young women out there. If you volunteer for the homeless, elderly, animal shelter etc, you are likely to find high quality unselfish people there, and who knows what could develop. To be able to live a life true to what you believe and free of JW is a fantasy for some of us, but a reality for you. Be happy you are now free, dont put the chains on again.
Good luck to you and we are here for you- BU2B
Are you both really in love, if so she will leave WT be patient. What qualities do you love about her, does she have integrity or does she want to live a lie. Your gf said she agreed with some of your points but wants a JW lifestyle. If after a period of time she still feels the same, What quality is she displaying here?
Many are awake to TTATT, but like the benefits that come with being an elder or elders wife. So they live a lie. There are two type of JWs the liars and the doormats. It's a cult there is no inbetween, faders have to lie and put on a false front, this is very lonely.
Take care with your future
I can not add any more insight to what has already been said here. I think Searcher's post is above is the most
realistic and staigtforward. I'm sorry there's no way to eat your cake and have it too-she has told you to take a break, so do it.
Thanks for the support so far guys you are awesome!
Go with yuor heart and regret it for the rest of your life.
Go with your head and enjoy the rest of your life .
If she doesn't accept TTATT. Walk away. Impossible to be happy together. You will regret it if you don't walk away.
Welcome! Congratulations on your parents and you waking up! I was in a divided marriage And while it was just one of our problems, it was not worth raising a child that way. It contributes to so much additional stress. Tread lightly in this relationship. Relish the break and use it wisely to plan your future.