by unstopableravens 52 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
Making people feel uncomfortable about shunning is entirely reasonable. If you can do it in public they will be even more uncomfortable - so much the better.
It is not attacking the person it's challenging their cult-controlled behaviour. It's called tough love. If they change their behaviour, forgive them and welcome them. Don't play their games.
Praying for people is another way of saying "do nothing".
The best strategy is to act like you don't know that they are shunning you. You should have behaved as usual.....I would have said hello, how's everyone doing.
When my elder father has reminded us (my 4 siblings) that he cannot associate with my 2 disfellowshipped siblings and he should not be talking to me (I'm not DA or Disfellowshiped officially...but have not attended a KH in 12 yrs and is an active member of my church). We tell him we understand, but we cannot shunn you. So we will speak and we will talk to you, purchase you gifts, invite you to dinner and outings and if you choose not to reciprocate that is on you.
...this has been very effective, because he attends are children's events, will talk with us...just not spiritual matters (his words lol).
So I suggest you get really comfortable with yourself and speak to them....this will help you to keep your power.
what a great strategy cofty!! love it :)
powerful 1 that is great too! i am taking notes :)
Shunning is a passive form of ashaming that normally only the shunned one perceives. Public confrontation is an agressive, active way to ashame others. It qualifies as harassment. I'm surprised you find it acceptable.
Eden
Unfortunately, THEY are the ignorant, brain-washed ones in this situation...you might respond by telling them Thanks for the UNCONDITIONAL LOVE, just like JESUS showed!!
Public confrontation is an agressive, active way to ashame others. It qualifies as harassment. I'm surprised you find it acceptable. - Nice Eden
How is saying, "hello, how are you" in a busy supermarket queue, harassment?
If they don't respond take it up a notch. Pretend they didn't hear you and say it louder. It's almost time to start wishing them a Happy Christmas or "are you having family over for christmas this year?"
If it's an elder you could try "so are you still a cult leader then?" or "what's the latest date for armageddon then, is it still just round the corner".
Don't be shy. They took your family and half your life. What's a bit of public humiliation?
"nice Eden" .... ?!?!?
Cofty, my suggestion was meant to shame , by praying out loud for them in their presence I meant that you would be showing that you were the bigger person and showing them Jesus' unconditional love as mentioned by freeatlast36 . This would be in contrast , obviously to the conditional love shown by them . It would also show that their shunning did not affect you which is the best answer to their behaviour .
As someone else said a person can only have hold over you if you let them .
Jan
by praying out loud for them in their presence I meant that you would be
That would make you look like a nutter and confirm all their bias.
