I've been trying to avoid posting this, due to extreme paranoia but its time to post my story. I hope to not post too many details, as we've avoided being DF so far, our group elder was young and lovely and cool and I just hope that in time he learns the TTATT.
I'm a regular lurker on here, occasional poster (I can't post much as my phone browser only lets me read but not post, so I only post on the odd occasion I get a time alone on the PC)
I have been fading since round about last September ( so almost my first anniversary of learning TTATT)
I decided in April that I could no longer attend meetings. I hadn't been out much in FS before that, just the odd time. Meetings were causing me soooooo much stress and anxiety that I decided to call it a day.
One month later, one of my children were diagnosed with cancer. I would never have imagined this, not in a million years. I was pretty much agnostic, but on the day of his major surgery, I realised I was an atheist. Being an atheist has brought me so much comfort. I don't have anyone to blame, or question or to supplicate. I've realised that life just sucks sometimes. I've realised that humans can be amazing. I've learned from my children that you have to live in the moment and enjoy all of the happy moments. I still don't know if our little boy will survive, he is going through some pretty intense stuff but he is absolutely amazing and doing so well that I have so much faith he will get through this.
My own family are being pretty cool and understanding, I've tried reasoning with my dad about the blood issue and how I'll never return to the cong because of this but my inlaws are crazy and think that we have no where to turn and don't know we can cope without 'Jehovah' TM.
I'm just greatful for every moment that I'm alive, every moment that we can cherish as a family, I have many JW's that I love very much but I will never, ever return. Even if I decided that there was in fact a God, I would never think that JW's were correct. The 'New System' etc are completely made up, I'd sooner be a Mormon.........................