So where else can we go?

by Julia Orwell 34 Replies latest jw friends

  • ABibleStudent

    HI Julia Orwell, Is your psychiatrist/specialist a cult-exit counselor? Does (s)he know how to deprogram you from the WTBTS's BITE control? If he hasn't read at least Steve Hassan's books and other books about deprogramming, have you asked him to read those types of books?

    Excercising is probably one of the best ways to improve your mood. Long-walks with your husband and just talking about how to refocus your life may help both of you. Remember you and your husband are cult survivors. The losers are still stuck in a dangerous cult.

    Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,


  • nugget

    I am sorry to hear you are hitting a tough patch especially as things have been going so well recently for you. Have you considered private tutoring as an option. This may offer some financial security and you would not have to deal with so many teens at once. They do seem to have a pack instinct and once they feel weakness then it is a downward spiral. If you are already feeling bad they can make a bad situation worse.

    Also talk to your doctor as they may be able to change medication to help stabalise your emotions and help you feel in control. Depression comes in cycles you know from experience things will get better. You also know that you may have episodes in the future and you are right that planning for those whilst you are coping better is so important. If you have a plan you have a degree of control even during the bad times.

  • JakeM2012

    Julia, many huggs and kisses to you. It is unfortunate of the coincidental timing of the cycles of depression to your fade. From your brief posts, I feel I somewhat understand your frustration as I have suffered from depression since I was a kid. Further, I have reached certain celebratory milestones in my four year fade.

    From your posts, it seems that you are going through a temporary low and you are perhaps considering that your low is causitive with your recent fade. It concerns you also that you are passing through the various doors of age and because of your WT indoctrination you have regrettably passed up opportunities.

    For me there have been times that my family and myself incorrectly thought that material prosperity or other positive things we enjoyed were due to "Jehovah's Rich Blessing" because of our active witness life, sacrifices to the organization, and loyal support of his arrangements through the "earthly organization".

    However, after accumulating some historical "data" to compare time and circumstances in my personal life, (I'm over 50 now) I know that in fact there is not any causitive connection of jumping through the continuous hoops of JW's or running on the JW exercise wheel with financial success, personal satisfaction and happiness, or mental and emotional fortitude. Any formerly perceived connection of being an example JW with satisfaction, happiness, or success is NOT causative, but only cooincidental.

    I'm sure that you are aware of this, but it is WT indoctrination that encourages people to make connections of either successes or failures in life to the quantity and quality of service to Jehovah and the organization.

    WTBTS does this by use and application of Bible examples like the Israelites loosing the battle against Ai because of the sin of A'chan. The battle loss at Ai was because of A'chans hiding spoil from the city of Jericho in a hole dug in his families tent. A'chans theft was the causation of Israel loosing Jehovah's blessing, subsequently the battle against Ai. Another Bible story that is used to "connect" JW's service performance and obedience to Jehovah's blessings is the difficulties that Adam and Eve had after they sinned and were not in the Garden of Eden.

    The concept that loyal support of Jehovah's organization was directly connected to my personal happiness, financial success, family unity, and Jehovah's "protection" was one of the hurdles that I had to overcome.

  • Julia Orwell
    Julia Orwell

    Thanks Jake, you really put it so it's easily understood.

    I've been doing some research on the stages of leaving a cult: denial, anger, then would appear I've hit the depression stage. I think my husband is still in the denial stage, though thank goodness he's gone 'inactive'.

    Problem with the depression stage is, as someone who's been fighting this illness for years, it's hit me to the point where I'm not sure I can keep teaching. I'm looking for an easier job.

    But what stage comes after the depression I wonder?

  • Julia Orwell
    Julia Orwell

    here we go, check out this link on the stages of leaving a cult: I left out 'bargaining' where I still wanted to keep my JW friends.

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