If you are fader, how do you handle assignments etc.

by Slidin Fast 34 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  00DAD

  The last few years I was still serving as an elder I began to edit my assignments. First I just left out things I had doubts about or disagreed with. Then I went through all my Public Talk outlines and culled the ones that even dealt with subjects I couldn't endorse. I asked the Talk Coordinator for a couple of new outlines telling him I wanted to "freshen up" my talks. I picked subjects which were non-controversial (to me). Then I told him I would no longer be giving this talk or that.

  The first talks I dumped were the ones that dealt with End Times predictions and Last Days prophecies, such as the Seven Times of Daniel or the Time of the Gentiles. Really I only gave talks on subjects like "Appreciating the Marvels of God's Creation" or topics dealing with developing Christian qualities. Ironically, I only recently realized that these were the things that interested me and in which I believed BEFORE I became a JW!

  I made similar changes in my TMS/SM parts and of course only commented at the WT or Bookstudy accordingly.

  Now to me, this is the truly amazing thing: No one seemed to notice! Not my wife, not my kids, not my fellow elders or anyone else, no one seemed to notice the changes.

  If anyone did notice, they never said anything.
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  happytobefree

  Blondie...my mother has not been on the TMS for over 25 years and my father is an elder. I always wondered how she was able to pull this off. But she also only attend the meetings on Sunday...and alot of Sundays she is saying she's sick.

  Being an eleder wife is definitely a privilege in the hall.
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  mrbunyrabit

  Yea, for all those who are still in, just accepting that you are not doing the things you do because you believe it, but only because its something to do, and its not like you are killing some one... Just accepting it as a way of life, Lauging at the stupid things, and taking up the life lessons you learn inside to improve your own life, and that of the people around you. No one ever died because they had a self sacrificing spirit.... Oh... Wait.... ( haha but you know what i mean)

  We are all gona get old and crazy some day... Might as well start with the crazy now...
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  AnnOMaly

  Does anyone else try to walk this line or am I alone?

  I did for a long while, and I was good - always got compliments, school overseer struggled to find points of counsel to work on (I usually suggested them to him!) - but over time there was more and more where I could not, in good conscience, just toe the Party line or give canned explanations to what amounted to trivialities ('do JWs believe in Jesus?' Short answer, 'Yes, duh.' 30 second answer, talk over) or spend hours trying to contrive artificial situations where the topic of 'what is Jehovah's rest?' might be worked into a discussion with a Buddhist on a bus while demonstrating effective use of illustrations. The stress every time a talk was assigned was getting worse and I asked to come off. Wonderful relief.
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  konceptual99

  I am finding it very difficult to handle assignments right now and just doing the minimum. I am not answering, am regularly missing meetings and field service so am finding assignments very frustrating. I have no problem delivering them, just a problem trying find a way of not being a hypocrite. I am amazed the elders have not approached me to remove me as a MS but I am sure the day is coming. I want to come off myself but my it would upset my wife so I think i will have to be pushed rather than jump.
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  joyfulfader

  I guess I did not consider myself actually fading until I was no longer giving any parts. That lead to sporadic meeting attendance and that lead to no field service and that lead to no meetings. Been 14 months since setting foot in the door of a KH. The only way I would knock on one of those doors in the territory would be to apologize for ever coming there in the first place with a bunch of crap.
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  problemaddict

  Interesting topic.

  I knew (know) a person who is no longer an elder for whatever reason, but he was known as a very good speaker. So he gets asked to go to congregations and give parts. He accepts these requests outside of his own state usually and gives parts. He tries to walk within the balance of his own convictions, but fails miserably at this. In speaking with him, I told him that even if he isn't technically SAYING anything that went against his conscience, when he came in as a "special speaker" he was just promoting that which he no longer believed in, the GB.

  He likes to "teach" and I respect that. He didn't see the connection. I did. I haven't given a talk since my own conversation with this person.

  Before when I was still serving, I just made sure I didn't teach anything agaisnt my conscience, and I would "switch" parts that I didn't agree with for a more benign part the following week or what have you. I just after talking to this friend of mine and seeing what he was atrempting, could no longer put myself in that position.

  He said it was more for him than for them. The pinnacle of selfishness.
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  problemaddict

  ^^^^^Also, I'm surprised dude hasn't been caught.
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  Doubting Bro

  I'm sort of in the same boat. I give talks maybe once a quarter and if it's a subject that I'm not comfortable with, I'll switch with someone saying I think I'm traveling on business that week. So, I try to do that early enough that if I happen to be there that night, I can say that the trip fell through at the last minute. So far, so good.

  I can't bring myself to comment anymore. I used to try to make a comment that didn't bother me but the tone of the WT studies and CBS is so Obey the GB that I had a hard time doing that without resorting to childlike answers. But, no one has ever said a word to me about it.

  They don't ask me to read, pray or carry mikes which is great since I don't want to do any of that.
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  Apognophos

  So far I've just been cowardly and handled the assignments as they came. I find that it hasn't troubled my conscience too much, which is probably because I feel anger over the years I've wasted in the org. And anyway, it's not as if I can work some magic words into my talk to make the audience wake up, to counter their indoctrination and willful self-delusion. However, maybe I shouldn't be answering this question, as my plan is not to fade in the conventional sense, but to move some distance away and immediately break off contact.