Well if it was something that caused doubts...it would be the best thing..right?
Will a governing body member making a gay pass at you in Bethel count? lol!!
What was the worst thing an "elder" ever did to you ?
by Pitchess Co-Gen 31 Replies latest jw experiences
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flipper
PITCHESS CO-GEN- Where do I start ? Elders have screwed me since time began as it always seemed I got stuck in congregations where they either hated my independent mind, thinking, or were just plain jealous that I was " too nice " or that I had a happy demeanor. They were out to " break me " of that demeanor.
I haven't attended in about 9 years , but let's see- The elders wanted me to get back with my methamphetamine addicted non-JW wife for appearance sake after she left me. They told me to not make her uneasy by having my JW teenage daughters visit at our house, so the elders said I should meet my daughters in a neutral park so as no to make my drug addicted ex-wife nervous or unhappy. The elders told me two different times I was guilty of " circumstancial fornication ". The first time because I had been separated from the druggie wife for 3 months and some JW in my congregation saw me having a cup of coffee at a Starbucks with a female who wasn't my wife. So the quicly organized JC asked me direct questions if I had fondled the lady's breasts or touched her vagina, or if she had touched my penis or other ways inappropriately , ( all this was asked me in the back room at a Kingdom hall BEFORE a meeting. ) The second time was almost 4 years AFTER I stopped attending one month before I married Mrs.Flipper and they sent my youngest daughter and JW ex-wife to spy on me at 10:00 A.M. in the morning to see if we were having sex before marriage. I answered the door fully clothed and explained I was getting ready to help my fiance go get tires on her car. For this I was accused of " circumstancial fornication " at age 47 for being at my fiances house alone - even though I hadn't attended meetings in almost 4 years !
I fought the DF charges and won my appeal so I could still talk to my older JW parents, but those same elders stretched it out over 9 months of JC meetings , including the appeal meetings, then kept me hanging in the wind another final month before Bethel legal told them to let me go and to NOT DF me because I had threatened them with a lawsuit if they did unjustly and they had no evidence whatsoever against me.
So, yeah, I guess you could say the elders have caused quite a bit of tress to me in my middle aged adult life. I trust them as far as I can spit. Like not at all. They won't touch me with a ten foot pole now as they realize they have a tiger by the tail if they tangle with me. I believe now they are scared of me, even my older brother and my dad actually are intimidated. It's kind of the way I want it actually- I won't stand for anymore crap being thrown on me. If I do - I'll turn into compost
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happy@last
1. Believed my abuser, thump him one, but still send me back to him when I was a small child
2. Another told me to move on with my life, the horrors I went through was a long time ago
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Justitia Themis
Sexual molestation.
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flipper
JUSTITIA- A flower for you my friend. I'm truly sorry that happened to you. This organization is criminally liable. Please know that we care. Sincerely, mr. Flipper
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Balaamsass
Happy@ last and Justitia, so sorry for the pain your abusers caused you.
Thank you for sharing, perhaps you have awakened a parent somewhere, to the dangers at the Kingdom Hall.
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00DAD
An elder once told me that if we were still under the Mosaic Law that they'd take me outside and stone me to death.
I reminded him that we are under the Law of the Christ and that he might want to take a glance at John 8:1-11.
BTW, this lovely bit of "spiritual shepherding" from said elder was in direct response to my request for help. I included in my request for help a reference to the parable of the Prodigal Son. Now I've read the account of the Prodigal Son hundreds of times. I never noticed the Father saying to his returning son anything about "taking him outside and stoning him to death."
I must've missed it.
00DAD
PS - In case you were wondering, the elder did not appreciate me pointing out that we are under the Law of the Christ. He declined to give any "spiritual help" to me. At the time it frustrated and upset me, but obviously it was a blessing. With elders like that, who needs Pharisees!
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flipper
I second Balammsass comments to Happy@Last as well. I'm so sorry you went through the suffering of abuse friend. Sincerely, Mr. Flipper
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Pitchess Co-Gen
Balammsass I'm so sorry you went thru that as a child.
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Justitia Themis
Thanks Balsam and Flipper, but it doesn't really bother me any longer. It was a long time ago, and I have moved so far past it that I rarely think about it unless I visit this site.
I posted it mostly to put things in perspective. When I was "in," "brothers" who complained about not being made a servant particularly irritated me. LOL! I would think, "Really?! That's the worst thing that has happened to you in the Org.?!"