Stop fighting about Oompa. (page 5)

Just so everyone knows, Oompa was his name in our circle. Since meeting him its been the way he was introduced, therefore its what most everyone called him in our close circle. We always had to think twice about "Eric". I told him very early on that Oompa fit him so much better. Eric was common but Oompa was fun, playful, unique and special. When you say "Oompa" everyone knows who you mean! It was great for the kids, it took on its own meaning like "uncle". He was my Oomp. We called him "Oompalicious" which I coined for him to use on a dating site and he LOVED it. He was Oompalicious!! He also would 'sign' things "Oomp" "Oompa" or "Oomps".

OUTLAW

LOL!!..Erics nickname was Oompa..

Thats funny..I didn`t know that..

He invited me to come visit with him..I wish I could have..

...................... ... OUTLAW

elderelite

Thank you for sharing, as hard as it must have been.... RIP oompa

mind blown

Thank you for sharing your feelings of utmost love for Oompa.

I didn't know him, but read many of his post which were written with candor and heart. I know your heart is shattered, but please realize the love you showed Eirc is carved into his soul, which will be within him forever, where ever he may now be..

Doubting Bro

Stacey,

Please accept my condolences on the loss of oompa. You've left some very moving posts and I can't imagine how difficult this is for you.

I will say that sometimes, when people post things on the internet, they forget that they're dealing with real people. In the case of this board, most have been hurt in someway. I sense that some of the fighting wouldn't have happened if all the parties were face to face. Civility is many times cast to the wind on these boards.

tornapart

Dear Stacey, my heart really goes out to you. I'm glad you have this place you can write on and tell us about your friend. My dad suffered with bi-polar and it wasn't easy to live with. He attempted suicide. Had electric shock treatment. Mutiple times in a mental health hospital. Sometimes the 'highs' were as bad (if not worse) than the lows. It was hard for my mum and for everyone who loved him.

Please keep writing, it helps to be able to vent all your feelings of grief, anger, pain and also the happy memories too. You loved him and all of those feelings are going to be close to the surface.

Sending you lots of love.

mamochan13

Stacey (and Wes). Thank you for your honesty. The fighting has been so disturbing to watch, and as difficult as it must have been - your comments were sorely needed here.

You've been through an exhausting experience and I hope you will be able to take some time for yourself after this to focus on your own healing. Dealing with extremes of mental illness and trying to keep someone alive when they are self-destructive takes an incredible toll. Your feelings are completely normal - those of relief and even the sense of having failed - even though you did not fail. You gave so much to your friend, and as you say, you are not a professional therapist. I believe one of the reasons suicide rates are high among mental health professionals is because it is so incredibly exhausting and difficult. So please take care of yourself now.

Oompa may well have believed he was doing something good for you by relieving you of the "burden" of being his friend. Many who choose suicide are completely convinced that they are doing family and friends a favour by dying. On some level they understand the difficult demands they are placing on their loved ones, and they consider suicide an act of love. In their profound pain they simply do not see that they will cause more hurt. Death stops their pain, therefore it will be a good thing for everyone else, too.

I hope you can feel the power of the support and love so many here are sending to you right now as you prepare Eric's memorial. My thoughts will be with you and his family during these difficult days.

still thinking

I'm so sorry for the loss of your good friend Stacey...so sorry....

Londo111

To Stacy, Undercover, and all the friends and family the knew him: My condolences as well.

When I was DFed, I contemplated death quite a bit. But Oompa's battles were far, far more serious. He fought for as long as he could.

Stop fighting about Oompa.

eva luna

Robert7