Video tribute to Oompa (Eric Reeder)

by cedars 83 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  palmtree67

  This is the truth and I will say it, even if no one else will. So, please, dissenters, keep in mind... I neither need nor want your approval: truth... is truth... and if you need it watered-down or colored as something else, you won't get that from me. Look elsewhere, which is easy enough as there are plenty who will do that for you. I won't.

  Please keep in mind that for some who were close to Eric, the pain, shock and grief may be too much right now to think about anything else.

  It may not be that they "dissent" and want it "watered down". Maybe some just need more time to process what has happened. It would be unfair to catogorise them as cowards right now.
• 

  AGuest

  I appreciate your comments, dear Palm (as always, the greatest of love and peace to you, dear one!). But I think you know me well enough to know that I'm not speaking as to such ones. I've lost VERY close loved ones myself and so understand this kind of grief. My comment as to "watered-down" and "colored" differently are for those who want such from ME. And they are out there, we both know.

  Everyone handles grief differently. Some need to step back and reflect. Some need to be alone. Others need to become active. I am the latter, more like the one who helps clean the house, cook and lay out the food, and greet everyone at the door... so that those who need to grieve privately and/or in tears can do so... without having to worry about the "details." That's because activity assuages MY pain and grief. And so I try to keep "busy" and continue living... in honor of one who no longer can.

  Which is what I believe most who've passed truly want us to do. I think they would have MORE pain if they thought we were SO hurt... and they were the cause of that hurt... as well as if we didn't think they were worth us stepping up and speaking up, if that needed to be done. That someone becomes angry at what happened to another... and does something to bring attention to it... doesn't mean they're dishonoring such one. It means they care ENOUGH to step out of their own comfort zone... for the sake of the one... and any others who might be experiencing the same or similar. Even if such aren't as intimately known to them as they are to others.

  The petty issues that some have taken thoughout this matter, though, under the guise of "honoring" another is sad, SO sad, IMHO. Because it belies that truth: it isn't about the one who suffered the demise, but their own feelings. Under THESE circumstances, this shouldn't be about ANY of us, though... but about Eric. This wasn't "natural" causes - this was provoked, under already fragile circumstances. It was IMMORAL... and we all KNOW it.

  We have time to deal with our pain, dear one; he no longer does.

  MY truth... and I'm sorry, truly, if it hurts. Stitching up major wounds can, though, sometimes.

  Again, peace to you!

  YOUR servant and a slave of Christ,

  SA
• 

  NewChapter

  Please keep in mind that for some who were close to Eric, the pain, shock and grief may be too much right now to think about anything else.

  It may not be that they "dissent" and want it "watered down". Maybe some just need more time to process what has happened. It would be unfair to catogorise them as cowards right now.

  Palmie, just take care of yourself. I know this has hit you on a personal level. Some will be sensitive to that, and some will not. Some will moderate their comments and set things aside, and some will not. It's just the way it is. Try not to let it add to your grief. Focus on yourself and Eric, and let the rest slide off of you. You know what you know, and that's all that is important. Nobody can ask you to take this up as a banner for their cause, and there is nothing deficient or cowardly in you for refusing to do so. Take some quiet time, my friend. Things are getting noisy. I have watched how you grieve, and the profound emotion you feel for a real person says so much about you. The decisions you make will be the right decisions. Ignore the rest.
• 

  Diest

  Does anyone else feel like Jesus has sent someone to test our collective self control? I don't even believe in the guy and I am starting to think that there is no other reason that some people could be so mean, nasty, and self-centered. Surely he sent them to us to teach us patience, because regardless of how nice you maybe, they dont get the hint.

  I have to believe it is from Jesus, or some other super natural force. There is no way that there is someone out there who is so overbearing and unyielding purely on their own.
• 

  NewChapter

  I can think of some examples, Diest. Like seasoning one's words with salt. I always thought that was a nice one, even though I don't really hold the bible as an authority, that's one little gem that goes a long way.
• 

  palmtree67

  You know what you know, and that's all that is important.

  Yes.

  The decisions you make will be the right decisions. Ignore the rest.

  I prefer to leave those decisions to those who knew him best. I'll follow their advice as to best ways to contact, etc.
• 

  NewChapter

  Palmie, the decisions I was referring to are those you make for yourself and how you choose to remember Eric, and also how you choose to integrate this tragedy into your life. Let no one else tell you what is brave, or cowardly, or right. You know how you need to fit this in so you can move on.
• 

  AGuest

  Nobody can ask you to take up this banner for their cause, and there is nothing deficient or cowardly in you for refusing to do so.

  Anyone who even tries to intimate that my comments were with reference to dear Palm (the greatest of love and peace to you, dear one!)... is more reprehensible that I ever imagined. Even if dear Palm herself misunderstood (and given her much warranted sensitivity, right now, it's entirely understandble, as it's always those closest to someone who asks themselves what more THEY could have done... the answer to which is, "Nothing, dear one, you absolutely did all YOU could do... and everyone knows that!")... clarification was made.

  If you don't get it (and no surprise, with all of that honkin' "intelligence" in the way)... that's entirely on you. But please, don't deceitfully try and use dear Palm to exploit your heart's ugliness. SHE deserves better from you... and it's even unbecoming of you.

  A slave of Christ,

  SA
• 

  Diest

  Yes just like there is only love in your heart for BOTR. Like when you and shirley go to her thread and mock her....

  I already deleted a coment on another thread that was for you Shelby, but you are an emotional bully and someone should tell you that. Quit it. Stop being the mean girl, respect people's beliefs, and be quiet.

  If you want to go shout something from the roof tops, start your own thread and do it. Or call up the 6 screens and go protest somewhere. In the mean time, leave people alone.
• 

  palmtree67

  Palmie, the decisions I was referring to are those you make for yourself and how you choose to remember Eric, and also how you choose to integrate this tragedy into your life. Let no one else tell you what is brave, or cowardly, or right. You know how you need to fit this in so you can move on.

  Yes, like Stacey said, I'm trying not to focus on the sad parts of his life. Just remembering the fun and funny things......the times when he was happy and laughing.