I don't know that I have any good advice. I'm a guy for one, so I'm speaking from the opposite point of view. And I've always been more attracted to "wordly" girls. I'm also shy and am not good at getting up the courage to ask girls out.
If it's meeting people, you could try joining groups that tend to have singles in them. That way it's not instantly a "date". You get to know the guys first. Even hear opinions or stories (or warnings) from other women in the group. There's also online dating, but that throws you right into a date situation, basically with only him to tell you about himself and no second opinions. There are all kinds of hobbies and a lot of clubs have singles because married life takes many away from hobbies. And if you're both into it, that means you already have a hobby in common. I'm a member of a running and drinking club called the Hash House Harriers that is probably 80% singles. And because most of us run, there's a lot of singles in mostly good shape too. At least as opposed to the population at large.
There are a lot of different types of people in the world. Now you're free to find one that suits you from among thousands that you may come in contact with. As opossed to the JW way of having to pick from a few dozen that might be in your district and you might have the chance to meet once a year at a convention. Or choose from the slimmer pickings in the circuit or the even slimmer choice of bachelor #1, bachelor #2, or bachelor #3 at your hall.
If you're new to being out of the JWs, I would go slow. Don't look for something serious immediately. You still have some adjusting to do yourself. Find where your head is at. Not to say your journey would follow mine, but mine illustrates some changes. When I was a JW, I wanted to find a mate who might be a bit flexible with the rules, but was going to stay a loyal JW. Glad that didn't happen. Then, after I left, I wanted somebody who at least believed in God, but wasn't adamant about beliving certain things because I wasn't sure what to believe yet and I didn't want us to end up fighting over it. Now I'm agnostic or maybe athiest and I'd want somebody who feels the same way and glad I didn't get involved with somebody religious. Not to say you're going to become an athiest. But you will have adjustments in your beliefs and outlooks to make. What's important to you right now may change greatly and may affect who you want to be with. So I recommend no big attatchments right away.
I don't know how it is where you are and how things are these days, but when I was a teenager, at my hall, starting to date was almost as good as a proposal. Nearly every couple who started to date ended up married. Which seemed totally opposite of the concept of "searching" for a good mate. You can't know somebody without dating them. You can't know somebody from outward appearance and the personality they wear out in public. But if you date and break up, you were seen as not seriious about marriage/dating.
Learn to date casually. Forget about where it will lead and whether he's going to make a good husband. Enjoy the moment and the company. That was the biggest thing I had to get over and I'm still not certain I'm entirely over it.
As for trusting guys, in what way? Cheating? You've been divorced twice as a JW and there's only one way to get a divorce approved by JWs. So if your ex'es were cheating on you, then it's not an issue of worldly guys being less trustworthy. It's JW guys too. So it's men in general. There are people who don't cheat. Just have to find the right guy and like I said, you have a lot more to choose from now. I was already an ex-JW when I got married, but my divorce would qualify as legal to them and it wasn't me who cheated. So not all guys cheat.
There are also a lot of guys out there who are after only one thing on a date. And I would guess that's a little more of a concern when you're dating wordly guys than JWs. JWs have that fear that not only might you turn them down, but you might also report them to the elders. So they wait longer until they're sure you might go for it. Wordly guys don't have any such fear. It's only the fear of whether trying will turn you off to them. And since sex is much more casual "in the world" and now days, he's probably used to getting sex more often when he tries for it. You can always say no. And don't be afraid to. If you're so inclined. If you want to, go ahead. You no longer have to fear a judicial committee. Just use protection.
And forget about all the nonsense the JWs told you about what is and isn't appropriate in the bedroom. If you both enjoy it, it's all good.
Watch out for players. If you see a guy who's always talking to women (even if he says they're just friends), and talks real smooth and is too good to be true, it's because he's got lots of practice. He's made those moves on hundreds of women and found what works for him and for the type of woman you are. Beware! Go for the casual sex if you want it, but don't look for anything more.
