Thanks for the update, and you're right: you cannot convince people of anything they don't want to hear; conversely it's dead simple to sell people a message of what they WISH to be the truth.... Sad that humans have that capability of self-delusion, but they DO, and people are able to exploit that weakness to their own advantage.
He also lowered telling the elders to just a if you want, status.
That whole "selective enforcement when it comes to the family of elders" deal is incredibly maddening to me: I served as a Captain in the USAF about 10 years ago, and there were some violations of sub-ordinates where you absolutely could NOT "play it by ear" or do anyone favors, without facing getting punished for not following organizational policy. JWs follow that whole "rank has it's privileges" BS thinking which has been purged from many other organizations namely for what it leads to: abuse of power. Meanwhile, the R&F JW is told that sharing in the secret is tantamount to sharing in the sin... Such a double-standard, where elders are empowered to sweep matters under rugs...
Anyway, play it as you must, and plot moving forward with your life: you are young, and you've got your whole life ahead of you. It may be you can only save yourself (which is sad, but often the reality), but it's better to know that now than later so as to decide which efforts are simply tilting at windmills, and throwing good money/time after bad.