How do stop myself getting too Bitter?

by stuckinarut2 36 Replies latest jw friends

  • Awake at last
    Awake at last

    Billy

    Next time you're there could you please put Tight Pants Tony under the water for me?

    Thanks!

  • Pete Zahut
    Pete Zahut
    It helped me to stop buying into the idea that I was a total victim and to own up to my own part of the blame. I realized that there were payoffs or benefits that I liked and perhaps I was too cowardly or maybe lazy to go against what others wanted me to do or believe even when I knew better. It helped to realize that so long as I am bitter, "they" still own me. It helped to admit that I screwed up and to make it my resolve that it aint' never gonna' happen again!
  • rip van winkle
    rip van winkle
    Oh Billy, I'm heading up to your happy place...lol. πŸ‘πŸŒΌπŸ˜Š
  • voodoo lady
    voodoo lady
    It makes you feel like someone you didn't think you were, right? That's been my experience. I think it's an inevitable and uncomfortable part of the journey, but I also think that when you arrive at a better place it washes away for the most part. Hopefully, when we look back we'll all be able to say that being on the wrong path led us to the right path, and be grateful for that.
  • truthseeker100
    truthseeker100
    I am no longer bitter and there is a part of me that screams out freedom! I am so glad I got out of this cult and I feel so sorry for most of them still trapped.
  • Alive!
    Alive!
    Voodoo Lady - Yes, I can definitely say I feel like someone I didn't think I could be....that in itself is a big hurt and obstacle.
  • Magnum
    Magnum

    You mentioned bitterness and anger. I think there's a big difference between the two. I seem to be sort of like you. I love life and am easy-going and I put people at ease. I don't think we're bitter; I think we're justifiably angry, and as I said, I think there's a difference.

    Bitter people, to me, are down on everything and sometimes they become mean and hateful. They see only bad and look for only the bad and lack a zest for life. I don't think we're like that. I think we're mad because we are not the bitter type; we love life and had so much of ours stolen. If somebody stole something valuable from you, you'd be justifiably angry, but it wouldn't make you a bitter person who lacks a zest for life and only sees the bad in everything.

    We have lost a whole lot because of JWdom, and I think it's healthy and proper to be angry. I think that's really what you are and it's what I am. I don't think either one of us is bitter.

    I love life and there is so much I want to see, to experience, to learn that I never will due to having been a JW. I am mad about that, but not bitter.

    EDITED TO ADD: I was watching the show American Greed a few nights ago, and it related the account of a cheating, lying, stealing, big-shot, selfish ego-maniac who cheated people out of their life sayings. When his scheme was discovered and the law came after him, he committed suicide. Several of his victims said they weren't mad. I was mad at them. I was thinking that was being way too passive. It was actually showing a weak sense of justice.

    So my point is that I think to be mad at the org for what it has done to us is indicative of a strong, healthy sense of justice.

  • jwfacts
    jwfacts
    Go and make a new and better life for yourself. There is no benefit to you or those trapped in cults if you remain bitter. When you have successfully moved on you will then be able to positively help others that are ready to be helped.
  • truthseeker100
    truthseeker100
    Well said Magnum!
  • Iown Mylife
    Iown Mylife

    I look at our forum here as my injury processor. The talking it out is a wonderful pressure release, but the greatest therapeutic part of it is the writing of our thoughts. The written expressions are a healing workout. Being able to funnel emotions into communication this way is a gift.

    Because I am bitter as hell as I recover from life wasted in a cult, but I do feel better every day, like the new skin is growing where they scraped it off.

    Just my opinion, reading here and writing things out will prevent that swallowing up.

    Marina

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