Things said from the platform

by MoodyBlue 28 Replies latest jw friends

  • joel
    joel

    larc,
    The point you made about persecution of JW's being almost none existant...is well taken.
    With now permitted alternative military service,jury duty,being able to vote,new medical policies...and so on...there is little opportunity for persecution.
    I have a friend in France...where until recently all males served 2 years of their young lives in prison...for not being part of the military...but just in time for him...policy changed...and he was spared!

    Such a deal!

    Pax,
    joel

  • TR
    TR

    Martini,

    How can we say we are doing these things of our own initiatve and love for God when infact we have no liberty to choose what it is we would like to do for God?

    Good point! It's like the saying; "make the truth your own". In other words, "like what we tell you to do or else".

    TR

  • trevor
    trevor

    Re: Things said from the platform.

    We had one elder who was beyond understanding that some things have a double meaning. We waited eagerly for each of his appearances wondering what clanger he would drop next. People would smile in anticipation before he even spoke.

    He took to the platform and in his normal Peter Cook voice asked " Have you ever had the desire? I know I have - Many times! As recently as last week a young sister expressed the desire to me."

    Unable to undrestand why about one third of the congregation was laughing he continued. "Do you know what that desire was? The desire to have a Bible study of my own!"

    Yes of course

    trevor

  • larc
    larc

    My story is not as funny as ones I have read here, but I am compelled to tell it anyway. First, I have give a little background. Ulga was a very sincere poineer women. Her husband Bob was kind off the wall, fun loving guy, which means I really liked him. I remember one day in service we are on our way between houses and out of a clear blue sky he asked me "Are you a virgin?" I like that kind of directness.

    Well, I told you that to tell you this.

    One Friday night when they were doing the role play on how to deal with people at the door step, Bob was playing the part of the householder, and poor Erny who was a nice man, but not too good as reader was playing the part of the expert Witness at the door. So Erny read the scripture about the Meek Inheriting the Earth, but his pronouciation wasn't very good so Bob, asked "What did you say" and so Erny repeated, and Bob said, Oh, I thought you said the mink will inherit the earth." I got a grin; the rest of the audience was agast.

  • RedhorseWoman
    RedhorseWoman

    Okay, true confessions here. As a young, extremely naive JW woman, I had the tendency to say things that could definitely be taken two ways.....and I had NO clue....none at all. I would wonder why people at work would suddenly burst out laughing at something I said. No one ever explained to me, either.

    Once I was out in service with another young sister, who, unlike me, was pretty wise in "worldly" ways.

    As we were getting ready to leave the car and start our territory, a puffy seedball wafted into the car interior. I remarked, "Oh, look at the hairy ball! Look, they're all over the place. It's an invasion! Maybe instead of warning the householders about Armageddon, we should warn them about the invasion of hairy balls."

    At this point, my service companion was nearly rolling on the floor laughing. She barely choked out, "No, whatever you do, DON'T say that."

    She never explained why......hmmmmm..... It certainly would have made our service day more interesting. LOL

  • LDH
    LDH

    Well, I'll make this one quick. I posted it over at Witnet b4 but thought you all would enjoy....

    Some 15 years ago there was an Awake about Hope for the Mentally Ill. I was in service with another young sister, who OBVIOUSLY hadn't even looked at the COVER of the mags b3 offering them at the door, much less read them.

    She was holding the magazines upside down so the householder could see it, and she told her, "This issue of Awake deals with Hope for the Mentally Three." I was laughing so hard, I almost lost it.....

    If you don't get it, please don't say so here as it will only cause me to question your intelligence.

    ;)
    Lisa

  • ZazuWitts
    ZazuWitts

    RedHorseWoman

    Glad I wasn't the only one; I had no street smarts, and used to use expressions that had others really trying to hide their laughter. Oh, to know then what I know now.......

    Lisa, that is really funny - LOL -
    did she ever realize what she had done?

  • larc
    larc

    RHW,

    Well, Zazu didn't tell you one I remember. When we were dating, I met her for the lunch hour break from her job. At lunch she ordered a milk shake. While stirring her milk shake, she said, "I'm going to 'knock up' this milk shake." I said, "what was that?" (I thought I didn't hear her right.) She said, "I'm going to knock up this milk shake." I didn't say anything at the time. We hadn't been going together that long. Told her about it later.

  • LDH
    LDH

    Zazu, we went straight back to the car so I could laugh Like I wanted to. Yes I told her as soon as we got in the car. OMG, did we laugh.
    The look on the HH's face was the BEST!

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