Uber Dub wants to have dinner....

by outsmartthesystem 51 Replies latest jw friends

  • Momma-Tossed-Me
    Momma-Tossed-Me

    When my FIL decided to report me to the Sentinels, one of them called.

    I called him back, and told him that I would me with him and him alone over a beer at a locale bar.

    He declined and said that two bros. needed to meet with me.

    I declined and said that the only, meeting I would have would be with him over a beer.

    He declined and that has been that for sometime.

    MTM

  • ziddina
    ziddina

    [Reading OUTLAW's most recent posts....]

    Whooopsies!!!

    I read someone else's post about "the nerve of that guy; inviting himself over for dinner!" and I was 'off to the races'...

    But this brings up an important point....

    If you can refuse, then refuse. PERIOD.

    If for some reason you are being "guilted" into going, then see my advice above about tapping one of your "worldly" [GASP! ] friends/buddies/fellow mischief-makers to come along for said dinner, and hammering Uber-Dub with everything controversial that he can remember [after you've secretly coached him, that is!! ]

    You'll need a special kind of friend or acquaintance for this... A somewhat cynical atheist would do nicely - do you live in Colorado?? There are several of us that might 'fill the bill' if you do...

    Do you have a neighbor that has some knowledge of what you're going through, who also knows something of bible history, or is an agnostic or atheist?? You could invite said person along, on the "spur of the moment", as a 'buffer' for your protection during the dinner - they'd have to behave themselves if a non-JW were there; wouldn't want to give "Jehovah's/Watchtower corporation's" name a black eye, now, would they???

    What I'm concerned about, is that if you are pressured to go, you will find more than one Uber-Du[m]b waiting for you at that "dinner"... It sounds like a trap, and I'd either DO WHAT THE MONKEY SAID, or take an ally - in the form of a non-JW friend or acquaintance - along with you...

    Zid

  • wobble
    wobble

    At some point this arsehole will ask you the loyalty question, something like "But you do believe we are in God's organization don't you?"

    it will come, in some form, over dinner, in front of witnesses, now, what do you do ? Lie ? O.K if you want to, but that doesn't get you anywhere, he will then ask you why you are not fully supporting God's Org. etc etc

    DO NOT GO, as they used to say on the old maps "There be dragons"

  • ziddina
    ziddina

    [hey, Wobble!! Watch it with those 'anti-dragon' comments!!! ]

  • Broken Promises
    Broken Promises

    I used to be an uber dub - mentally anyway.

    I eventually left, so don't be so hard on this guy. It's often the ones who fully believe that are the ones who leave for good when they do leave.

  • outsmartthesystem
    outsmartthesystem

    "Who the f*** does he think he is inviting himself over for dinner? Oh god, I can't stand JW's. "

    Oops. Sorry. I don't want to sensationalize the story. I should have clarified. He wants US to come to HIS place for dinner. But still....I'd be captive over there. Plus....he lives in the government funded projects. I don't know if I want my children over there.

    "Does your wife think this uber dub is a great example for you or does even she roll her eyes at his excessive devotion to the borg?"

    It is kind of a double standard with her. Yes she thinks that he is "overzealous" sometimes.....but it is excusable to her because she'd rather someone be overzealous than not zealous at all. But as soon as I make the same observations that she did about him....she immediately sees my "bad attitude" shining through.

    "Just so you know, outsmart, if it comes up again with uber doober, it will go better with you if you are "mad at Jehovah" than if you are mad at the Org."

    Ya know....this never ceases to amaze me. Somehow God can forgive measly humans who dare show anger towards the almighty.....but he can't forgive measly humans who dare show anger towards a human organization?

    "Go and tell him the truth about the truth. Guaranteed you won't get anymore calls or invites. Remember, it takes two witnesses for judicial action. "

    But those two witnesses don't have to both see the same "crime" right? Therefore I'd be treading on thin ice. All it would take is my wife to mention something to her father that I said.....and then we'd officially have two witnesses, no?

    "Either way, the CO will be impressed with him... don't give him that pleasure..."

    I didn't want to sound paranoid....but this actually crossed my mind. I started to wonder if there is already (since my wife talked to the PO and CO about my "issues" an underground investigation going on and this uber dub was brought into the fold to see if he could breach the veil.

    "Which leaves the only relevant question: Is he a good cook?"

    I have no idea. Thus far in the 5 years I've known him I have managed to avoid this situation.

    "It would be better to be angry with Jehovah compared to anger with the org! It reveals the problem. If you do not like him, why bother? You know what he will say. Do you think he is going to reveal that he is about to go apostate?"

    Certainly not. My only reason for doing so would be to show my wife that I am not an evil, mean apostate. Remember, the society paints anyone that would dare question them as evil, crazy, bad-hearted people that seek to ruin other humans. If I refuse to go she could possibly see it as me taking one more step towards the deep end (i.e. refusing to have "wholesum' association). She'll say to herself...."wow. The brothers were right. First he stopped going in service. Then he stopped commenting. Then he stopped going to meetings. Now he doesn't want upbuilding association anymore. The next step will be apostate literature!" Unfortunately NOT going plays right into the hands of what the elders have undoubtedly been telling her about me.

  • Caedes
    Caedes

    Why don't you go over and simply act as if he was confessing to his own "spiritual weakness" if you are a good enough bluffer you could completely throw him off his game.

  • jookbeard
    jookbeard

    made me laugh OSTS, we must have all met Dubs like this jackass, I wouldn't give him the pleasure of going over to his place, you dont know how he will dishonestly planning to frame you, what I would do is return his call and ask him how hell do you know that my spirituality is a downward spiral? and tell him to mind his own business.

  • outsmartthesystem
    outsmartthesystem

    "If I were in your shoes, I'd tell Uber-Stupid that I'd LOVE to have him over for dinner, as there's this co-worker/neighbor/mailman that you have daily contact with, who is asking questions about 607 B.C./1914 and Christ's "invisible" presence/blood transfusions-organ transplants/whatever subject you know well, that would cause major problems for Uber-Stupid to explain away the Watchtower Corporation's stance upon said issue/bible teaching..."

    That'll never work. My wife and kids will be there too. My wife knows where I stand with everything. And she knows 607BC is one of my biggest problems with the society. She knows I think 607 is bullshit. If I were to bring it up at the dinner table and ask him for advice on "how to answer a co-worker's question".....my wife would know that I am putting on a clever ruse. She would know that my real intent was to sew a seed of doubt in his head. Then we'd fight all the way home about me "putting apostate ideas in other peoples' heads". Not good

    "You should check in the yellow pages under rentals and see if anyone rents monkeys. "

    Shamus....where do you live? They don't exactly rent out monkeys to the general public here in the U.S. :)

    "When we were fading, we still got invites from some of the 'uber' dubs, but these seemed to be the only ones who truly cared about us. I know that doesn't say much for the rest of our 'acquaintances' from the hall; out of sight, out of mind. But, because we really enjoyed being with the ones who had invited us and loved them for who they were, witness or not, we could put up with their probing questions as to why we were lagging in attendance, not doing the weekly service thingy, etc. These people really were trying to help us (in their own way!)"

    See....that's the thing with this guy. He has never been a friend. I honestly think he DOES worry about me and my "lagging spirituality". I truly do think he cares....he is just overbearing and completely tactless. Years ago I was out in service with him. I watched him insult a householder's conviction about "once saved always saved". When her attitude turned cold toward us and we left......he was truly clueless as to what made her change suddenly. He's not stupid either. Just overbearing and tactless.

    Overall....I think I can get away with not going. I'll just tell my wife that the situation can't end well. She knows how I feel about the organization. And she knows how overbearing this guy can be. If I ask her to reason on the matter and put herself in my shoes (having to deal with tactless, probing questions) I think she may understand why I dont' want to go. I may even take a couple of people at the KH that I like and use them as examples. I may say "now had THIS person invited us over.....I would go because THIS person has tact and knows when to shut up".

  • WuzLovesDubs
    WuzLovesDubs

    Oh I think I would go. I think you should suggest you all order pizza and sit and watch the World Series in front of the TV because this is just a "social" visit aint it? LOL I love this type ....the last uber couple I knew SHE was a pioneer and their kid got baptized at like NINE and he did every single talk and she did tons of substitutes on the school when peeps didnt show and she was alwaaaays there at FS. And she ended up having an affair with an 18 year old pio and having sex and running off with him, getting caught in a hotel, getting DFd and of course came BACK after divorcing elder hubby deserting her kid and marrying this CHILD 20 years her junior... (only 2 years older than her own kid) and now they are all back in the Troof again. Happy happy.

    Yep...uber dubs....even THEY streak their underwear once in awhile.

    I say go...have a laugh, admit nothing, answer nothing unless its with another question. Record the evening.

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