Shocked at what my 3 year old just asked me

by jwfacts 53 Replies latest jw experiences

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  jwfacts

  My son is 3.5 years old and my wife's JW mother cares for him two days a week. I knew this would be bound to come up, but I am shocked at how soon. Last night my son asked me:

  Zac - Dad, do you love Jehovah

  Me - Jehovah? Who is Jehovah?

  Zac - Jehovah is up there in heaven with Jesus Christ

  Me - Oh.

  Zac - Are you happy with me dad for remembering Jehovah

  Me - Oh, ah, ... well yes Zac, I am happy that you are learning so many things.

  I now know that the mother in law is trying to indoctrinate him. I am not sure if I should mind too much, as I think he needs to learn about all these things, so as not to be vunerable to them in the future. But I am not sure how much potential damage there is, or how to respond to the things that he will be taught.

  My Mother in Law is Filipino, and does not seem to mind speaking to me, as Filipino's are less willing to follow the Watchtower decree on shunning, particularly family. My wife has not wanted to upset her mother in discussing what my stand about the Watchtower is, and I do not know if she is even aware that I have a website about the organisation.
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  neverendingjourney

  That's a tough one. My nephew (who was about 6 years old at the time) looked at me once with tears in his eyes and asked me why I didn't go to meetings with them. What do you say to that?

  I guess it really depends on what kind of relationship you want to keep with your MIL. I would be inclined to say something along the lines of "well, you know son, different people have different names for him. Some call him Jehovah, others Jesus, others Allah...." but getting conficting info about important things like that from his grandma and dad would probably greatly confuse the poor child.
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  NewChapter

  It's hard because she's just not teaching your son that there is a god in heaven, she is teaching him that god will destroy all those that are not JW's, which includes you and your wife. It's really a tough one. Maybe you could teach some things yourself so he is more prepared. You want him to learn things, and this is your chance. Explain to him that some people believe there is a god and some people believe his name is Jehovah. Teach him that some people think that this god might do mean things, but that you think if there is a god, he would not do mean things to hurt people.

  You'll have to decide how much of that he can take---but we KNOW what the JW's will teach him.

  NC
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  NVR2L8

  The other day my 3 year old grandson asked me to say a prayer at dinner time...I told him that maybe his daddy (my unbaptized son) could say one...but he insisted for me to say it...My daughter in law realized that I wasn't going to so she said something to distract him...It tug at my heart but I just couldn't go throught the motion. These kids are vulnerable to any influences good or bad.
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  lifestooshort

  I really enjoyed your thoughts on this NC. My daughter was about 5 or 6 when she asked me why I dont go to meetings anymore. I just told her that I who Jehovah is and jsut because I dont go to meetings doesnt mean I dont love Him. I also told her how people treat each other is more important them what thye believe. How this helps.
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  Bells

  I'm really interested to hearing the outcome of this... I don't have children as yet, though hope to within the next few years. I'm sure that the in-laws will want to teach 'the truth'. I don't want to be the one to say not to as I want my children to be able to learn everything out there, but having a child dragged into the cult is really one of my worse nightmares! It's a tough one - good luck!
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  shamus100

  Jehovahs witnesses need education on what is apropriate. For most, it's common-sense. But for a JW who has to listen to meeting parts about oral sex while their children sit by them, well, you can imagine the peversity. ;(

  Under no circumstances should any child be talked to about religion without a parents conscent.
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  dogisgod

  Your MIL is a babysitter. Period. She does not have the position or authority to "indoctrinate" your kid into anything.
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  diamondiiz

  Tell him the truth. There are many religions out there and many have their own gods and none can be proven, nor have any proved themselves to be real. Can be compared to a tooth fairy. You may want to talk to your MIL to stop with WTS or you should find another sitter. Many witnesses won't stop as they feel it's their obligation and unless someone sets them straight they may think they know better in this regard. Filipinos are warm people though and may listen to what you have to say.

  It may not be a big deal that your boy learns about "Jehovah" now BUT if this continues this will grow on him and then you may be viewed as an enemy of god because you don't go to KH, you celebrate all the things god "hates," and so forth. No parent would wish a cancer on their kid and after all wts is like cancer.
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  jwfacts

  Thank you for the comments.

  It is an interesting situation. I have not spoken with my son about God, as I think it is not something to discuss with a child until they get to an appropriate age where they start asking relevant questions. Otherwise it becomes indoctrination.

  On the other hand, I have an friend that was raised in an athiest family, and at 20 his sister joined a born again cult. They never had spoken about other points of view growing up, and so she was vunerable to it.

  IMO, a household with open, educated discussion would be the safest way for a child not to be carried away by any extremist views. I just did not want to be tackling these sort of questions at such a young age. I am not sure that my son quite understands the difference between fairy stories and reality, and to introduce yet another dimension with spiritual discussion does not seem age appropriate, (unless of course I wanted to indoctrinate my child into a single specific religion.)

  I will chat to my wife about what she thinks the MIL will do if we speak to her about it. My wife does not really worry either way, as she never was particularly interested in Watchtower doctrine as a JW and did not have any issues leaving.