Shunning,, let's twist the knife in a little deeper now !

by man in black 37 Replies latest jw experiences

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  nugget

  I wish your wife a speedy recovery and hope she starts to feel the benefits quickly.

  I admire your courage to carry on with your plans despite having to endure the mass shunning you did. I am always worried by the relish with which some people apply the directive to shun. This is billed as a loving act reminding the df'd or da'd one that they cannot share the loving fellowship of the congregation whilst they are in a disapproved state. What this episode shows is an arrogant bunch of people bullying another to make them feel inferior. There is no god in this act.

  What you are doing with your dog is of much greater worth than anything these people did that morning. You make me proud to be an apostate.
• 

  MrMonroe

  My wife and I went with two friends to a restaurant one night. As we walked in, we realised the long table near the doorway was occupied by about 20 JWs from our old congregation who had presumably been to a convention that day. Some called out "hi" as we walked past: safety in numbers for them I guess.

  Our table was at the rear of the restaurant, and anyone visiting the toilet had to walk past our table. During the night many of those people at the long table did walk down; one stopped for a chat and a handshake, one more said "hi" as she walked past; the rest ignored us completely as they walked past our table.

  Our friends were non-JWs who were simply shocked at the way those idiots ignored us. We explained that these people knew us well: we'd been to meetings with them for 15 years, been to the homes of some, and some had been to our home. The weird thing was we weren't disfellowshipped: we'd just stopped going to meetings. Yet that fact alone was enough for them to avoid us.
• 

  Yan Bibiyan

  MIB, glad the wifey surgery went well; wish her a speedy recovery.

  As to your reaction to the the dubs snubbing you, you are way too kind (which is a wonderful thing). It would have been really difficult for me not to give them all "f@#k you" looks while smiling in their faces all along....but that's just me.

  I don't have a dog yet, but when I get one, it would be like yours
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  sizemik

  It can seem quite intimidating when they travel in large herds like that. It's good to remind yourself that the very same thing can happen to any one of them . . . and probably will for at least a few of them at some stage. It probably spoiled your lunch . . . but I bet the sense of relief kicked in when you finally walked out the door . . . that you're not like that.

  I've spent the last 18 years without a gall-bladder . . . haven't missed it at all. I can still remember the pain it caused beforehand however. If the surgery was laproscopic . . . recovery will be reasonably swift.

  All the best to you both during recovery
• 

  KingDavidwasframed

  JRK wrote " After geting over the the initial shock of being shunned, I kind of enjoy it, because they are more uncomfortable than you are."

  I couldn't agree more!!

  MIB,

  Just keep on being a good guy! Things will always work out ;)
• 

  DesirousOfChange

  "And as I sat there it really hit me how conditional friendships are with the jw's."

  Please remember that there may have been persons among the group who would have like to have given you a greeting and asked about you (and your wife, once they heard she was hospitalized), but in the group setting they could not
• 

  laverite

  They aren't worth your emotional energy. Congrats on DAing yourself.
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  tenyearsafter

  MIB...sorry to hear about your "upbuilding" experience with your ex-friends...it never ceases to amaze me how crazy that attitude is.

  Glad to hear that the surgery went well. My daughter had hers out this summer, and she literally went home the same day as the surgery!...amazing stuff.