How Did You Deal With God Destroying Non-Witness Relatives that You Loved?

by DNCall 17 Replies latest jw friends

  • DNCall

    So many of my non-Witness relatives were, and are, good people. I had to do something to deal with the likelihood of their being destroyed.

    Those I was close to in the faith, and I, had the hope that, sometime before the end, some issue would arise that would wake up our relatives and other loved ones to the realization that they had to come into the fold. Some would speculate that the destruction of false religion would be that event, even though the notion is at odds with “current truth.”

    The other thoughts that we comforted ourselves with were that: (1) the God of Perfect Justice would not destroy anyone without just cause; and (2) even good people would be destroyed for the crime of “t[aking] no note,” as Jesus described those destroyed in Noah’s day.

    Those thoughts worked for me, for a long time, and I believe they keep many current Witnesses pacified on this issue.

    I’m curious to hear of other techniques that any of you used, when you were associated, to rationalize a loving god destroying good people.

  • Coffee House Girl
    Coffee House Girl

    As a child I would pray with my mom everynight and ask Jeh to help my dad and brother come back to the "truth"- when I would ask mom what I would do if Armageddon came and dad and my bro didn't make would I get through that??

    My mom told me that Jehovah would take care of my feelings of grief- she made it sound like Jeh would shut my mind off to the grief like He shut the mouths of the lions for Daniel...that I would feel nothing at all

    that always made me feel hollow....


  • Dagney

    DNCall, you know I'm blond. My way of coping was not to think about it when I was a JW. If I had, maybe I would have left sooner. :-( Be that as it may, I sort of hoped the good, right thing would happen for the earth and mankind somehow, some way.

    As for god, I now beleive what you are asking was at the core of why I didn't pray much all those years. He seemed so unfair. I didn't want to talk to him much. xx

  • kazar

    Same here. I prayed all the time that my relatives would come into "the truth" prior to Armageddon. So sad to think about it. However, I had been pre-conditioned for this event by the Catholics before I converted to JW's. The Catholic catechism class taught that if our relatives went to hell (a burning place) those of us in heaven would be able to look upon the poor suffering souls but we wouldn't be sad. What bullsh... Reminds me of the story of Lazarus in the bible.

  • mummatron

    I used to pray for my relatives and others to come to know "The Truth™" because I was conditioned to do so as a born-in. I never really thought that they would be destroyed as at the back of my mind I never really believed that Armageddon would happen despite the fact that I get nightmares about it.

  • AudeSapere

    There were a few that I/we just knew had such a good heart. It was unfathomable that they would die at Armageddon. So I/we would try to reason with them to join the JW's. We would also try to win them without a word by our actions - and worked real hard to not let them about our 'secret sins', cracks in our faith, or the fact that home life was less-than-perfect.

    For some, I/we hoped that they would die soon - so they could be resurrected in the New System and see that we had the truth afterall.

    How sick for anyone to think like that. Such isolation from family and friends and thinking that dying young is a good thing.


  • cantleave

    When I was a child, of about 8 or 9, I remember feeling sadness that the children in my school would be destroyed. I used to pray gor them to come into the "truth"

  • breakfast of champions
    breakfast of champions

    I was actually thinking about this the other day...

    I 'dealt with it' by climbing the ladder of Theocratic Success and becoming an elder. I then invited my evil, terrible worldly father to a series of my public talks I had hoped would convince him of the 'truth.'

    He was very gracious, no - actually beaming with pride as he watched me give my public talks on sundays...

    Of course he knew it was mostly bullshit.

    And after each talk I gave he would congratulate me, said how proud he was of me, and that he loved me. And give me a HUGE HUG.

    This from the evil, terrible, worldly man who I expected to die at Armageddon.

    This is one fucked up cult!

  • fresh prince of ohio
    fresh prince of ohio

    For most JW's, the ever-imminent Destruction of the Wicked isn't something they think about much in real world terms, if they believe it at all - it's just kept in their religio-fantasy mental compartment. I think i was like that.

  • Velour

    I pretty much quit talking to my non-jw family. Out of sight, out of mind.

    Today, I feel so dumb that I couldn't see how they were, in fact, the ones showing me REAL love. Despite me seeing them as Satan's Tools, they invited me to important family gatherings, wanted to share gifts with me, and I always smuggly turned down the invitations because they were trying to hinder my pure worship to god. For over 10 years they wrote to me, called me, and invited me to occassions that were important to them that they wanted to share with me, even though I was an arrogant little b*tch shoving scriptures down their throats and wearing my disgust on my sleeve.


    I've worked hard to try to repair the damage and it will take time. However, I feel so glad that I woke the f*ck up and can now embrace my family. I appreciate that they're still loving me and are so very open to having me (^_^)

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