My Wedding Photos are. . .

by leavingwt 40 Replies latest jw friends

  • leavingwt

    Nice Dream:

    For most of our married life I tried to be a good JW wife, but it made me depressed. I felt like I couldn't be myself with my husband or live up to who I thought he wanted me to be. Now that I can finally be myself, we have such a wonderful relationship, I just wish it could have been this great from the beginning.

    I think that many of us went through some of that. Once we exit, we can be honest with ourselves and with our mates. Sometimes this can mean the end of the marriage. For others, it can be a new beginning. I'm happy that it worked out for you.

  • shamus100

    our wedding photo's are mixed, there is a whole back story about the elders trying to force us to have the wedding in the kingdom hall, and if we didnt i would be deleted as an ms. so i stepped down and told them to gft. anyway, our wedding photo's have 2 people who no longer contact us, and there are the best man, and maid of honor. the way i view it, is those people, especially the best man who was a very close friend, no longer exist as i knew them. so the people in those photo's as far as im concerned dont exist or are dead. i liked the person they were when those pics were taken, and that person is no longer.

    Do you see what happens when you don't get married in a KH, active dubbies? BEWARE!!!!! Jehovah inhabits cheap-assed buildings with cheap carpets and cheap chairs. ;D

  • leavingwt


    But all those so-called "friends" are no longer real friends. Truth be told, most of em I don't miss. The bridesmaids and groomsmen, those were close friends who are no longer close. They've distanced themselves from us because we're inactive and don't respond to calls to return to the KH.

    I hear you. When you first awaken or exit, you view them as still being your friends and it's easy to grieve for them. A little time goes by, and you realize that you have very little, if anything, in common with them. Minus the WT organization, the magic is gone. However, should they exit, there would be something that you'd have in common, and a friendship might resume.

    I try to remember the good times, because they were good times. Also, it's a good reminder that ALL relationships end.

  • leavingwt


    You have lovely children and they stand much better chances because of you and your wife's decision.

    Happy anniversary!

    Thank you. When I look at those photos, I realize that my wife and I are much different people, now. I would like to believe that we are stronger. I look forward to the day when my kids are old enough to hear our cult war stories and get a good laugh from them.

  • leavingwt


    I had recently been DF'd, so only my immediate family attended the 'celebration',,, no friends of ours (that would have offended my parents),,, and it was very low-key and much SADNESS exhibited by my parents and (uggh, I hate to say the word) my 'brother'. In short, we were robbed of what should have been an exuberant, crazily happy day!

    Indeed you were robbed on that day. I'm sorry that this was the case. Our collective stories are quite a tale!

  • leavingwt


    It just messes with your head constantly. It's a weird time. I was wondering if others on the board are receiving more contact with their former friends than usual.

    LWT, congratulations on your exit and success, and happy family life. I appeciate your thoughtful posts. Happy Anniversary!!!

    Right, it can mess with your head. Contact with a former associate is a big unknown, which can be really joyous or go horribly wrong as they get on their high horse to remind you that they are better, etc.

  • Magwitch

    Happy Anniversary LeavingWT! Maybe you and your wife should renew your vows in a beautiful outdoor setting with a photographer.

  • leavingwt


    While I was never converted and had to leave like you ( a feat that you should be very proud of), she was my source of love and strength in my way to the truth about the JW's.

    Love is awesome, isn't it?

    We should never take for granted that we had a partner during such difficult periods or our life. It can also help us try to assist others, if it's in our capacity to do so, when necessary.

    Nickolas: Thank you. If you'll kindly post one of your photos. They sound EPIC.

    Robdar: Thank you.

    Mad Sweeney: I hadn't thought about the people in my photos who are no longer with us. Indeed, there will be several among my photos, as well.


    Not very attractive but come to think of it, I guess we could have them photoshopped out.

    As Shamus has pointed out, the Kingdom Hall is not a very photogenic place for a wedding. Nor is the atmosphere anything to write home about. Especially, as we refelct upon it as ex-members.

    shamus: Some of the color schemes are enough to make one hurl. I first attended a KH with (I kid you not) ORANGE carpet.


    here is a whole back story about the elders trying to force us to have the wedding in the kingdom hall, and if we didnt i would be deleted as an ms. so i stepped down and told them to gft.

    Well-played, sir.

    discreetslave: Excellent ideas. Thank you.

    partydelights: Excellent advice about turning the computer OFF.

    magwitch: Thank you.

  • cantleave

    LWT - Congratulations. I know what you mean about the photo's, but it means that despite all you have been through, those closest to you are still with you.

  • Borgia


    Congrats, on your anniversary; the both of you!

    I watched the video of my wedding some weeks ago and saw a very very young man basically on the eve of getting out; a man who was unaware of the vicissitudes of seasons. Most of the people in the video have no longer any meaning in my life safe one or two. And when I imagine their current life, they live it like they've always have: in the mindnumbing comfort of the weekly repetition giving up their freedoms for a false sense of security.

    Glad you are out and enjoying life!



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