by youngbro 50 Replies latest members adult
My f am ily is well known but not like elderdom or anything...I mean not to brag but I am rather smart, kinda gifted, well actually, my teachers etc all said I could be almost anyhting I wanted to be....
as far as my goals:
I am not sure, I might fade once I am out on my own...I just am not sure.
my teachers etc all said I could be almost anyhting I wanted to be....
Don't let your potential be stolen from you ,,, please! Think of what you like to do,,, it's okay,,, no, it's BETTER than okay, to know you are gifted. These gifts are meant to be used ... to have a love of writing, or art,,, maybe mathematics ... yes,, think about what you would LOVE to do with your life.
While making up your mind,,, consider staying single ..
tal
*feels the passion swell* My entire life, I have had gifts, ablities, that made me better, tbh than others...Heck, I give a better part than a lot of elders, and I am not bragging, its just a fact, but being a JW, I was told to be humble and never to brag, and I now have almost no self esteem...I am so afraid guys! And as far as my age, Scully, let no man look down upon my youth. It just annoys me because I KNOW I can be an asset, I mean I have given 15 minute parts w here people raved about how well they were, little did they know tha I had been an impropmto of five minutes notice...
I know you're afraid,,, and you could be 57 and if always a JW,,, have a lot to learn, as the org 'shelters' its sheepTM from any outside influences / knowledge, so I don't think Scully was being age-ist.
It's okay to be afraid ,,, you're facing the first, biggest decision of your life!
Think of what you could do in school! I found the training I received in the KH was invaluable when getting up in front of a bunch of business people and making a presentation ... we were trained to be good speakers, good studiers, and we also know how to dress FINE... :D
Do some reading here,,, there's lots of folk who made the break young, and are soooo happy for it!
Well, 'nuff said from me tonite,,,
take care, youngbro, and I hope to read more of you.... one step begins the journey.
tal
Dear youngbro: Don't let yourself be abused.
They will NOT be gratefull. They will be annoyed - untill they tell themselves they are the wiser and you are just dumb, naive or crazy. Then they will give you the errand tasks, cleaning jobs aso. And you do it willingly and with eagernes because you want to show how humble you are.
Dear youngbro: GET OUT OF THERE. That MS-post will kill your spirit and they will use it to maintain their grip on you. As long as you WANT the MS-status, you'll be their fool.
Write Bethel and you would PROVE you are unruly. If you write that letter, the elders would no longer need to search for "something" to hold against you. It would "prove" their point.
You see, it is not about being zealous. It is about being a part of the gang. All the rest is just excuses for bullying the rest and keeping them zealous and submissive. Now, you are NOT a part of the gang. You were MEANT to be a part of the gang perhaps, but instead you turned out to be zealous. They will keep searching for an excuse to put you down in a way, that both you and the surroundings will accept. You are in for a nightmare.
Unless, of course, you sell out in the attempt to be part of "the gang".
Let me share one of my experiences as a MS:
I was "working" in the field of foreign languages. One weekend I and two elders from my group visited a town, where we were to try and start activity in the foreign language area of that town. After the day had ended and we had encouraged many eager youngsters and the local pioneers, the three of us were to gather with some of the local elders in one of their homes.
Beers en masse was set on the table and everyone were having way more alcohol than we were supposed to. The drunken elders started to laugh at the naive and "fanatic" youngsters and pioneers, talking abot how pathetic they were. I had never seen the like and were in chok over their behaviour. They noticed and asked the two elders from my group where they had picked up that fool (me). They were told, I were a pioneer and had just been appointed ministerial servant. A sudden silence fell over the gathered group and it was agreed that it was time we made our departure.
Do you want to be a wolf or a sheep?
NB:
Youngbro: You are a MS. Don't expect that they will let you "fade" away. It is too late for that.
Make the preparations that you must. See to, that you do not leave any loose ends behind concerning family and friends. Then make a clean cut with all the consequences that comes with it.
With all respect for those, that have ousted "the secrets" of "the ganglife", but the life of a spy is just another way of staying addicted. Tell your story, tell what you know and then leave that dishonest life behind.
The first period after that is very silent. Then you will start making new connections, new friends. Get that education and do the hard work it takes. In the end you will be someone, one who have created a life for himself, one who have made real friends on his own terms.
And when frustrated, there is always groups like these, with people that shares your experience of JW.
Newbro: Think about every decision you make and be deliberate. You may decide a clean break doesn't work in your case. We don't know all of the details of your situation, so we can't really tell you what is best. There are consequences and rewards to every option ahead of you. You have to decide what will cost the least in terms of your emotional health. It sounds like you want to fade. Miss an assignment. Cut down of FS time---do you really want to teach this stuff? Become undependable. Lose you position. Then you can start a fade. If you hold on to your position, even though you are not serving whole heartedly, then what is that saying? Take your time. We'll be here.
NC
youngbro writes:
as far as my age, Scully, let no man look down upon my youth.
The thing is, it is human nature to feel threatened when a "golden boy" like yourself comes in and starts making the old guard look bad. If they are imperfect men (and they *are* imperfect men) their temptation to 'take you down a couple of notches' will be great, and they may feel, despite your poor self-esteem, that you need to learn humility. Youth is beneficial for its strength and vigour, but sometimes lacks the discernment and discretion that come with maturity gained over years of experience.
It just annoys me because I KNOW I can be an asset, I mean I have given 15 minute parts w here people raved about how well they were, little did they know tha I had been an impropmto of five minutes notice...
Hey, I've done the same, sometimes several weeks in a row, when other Sisters™ cancelled their talks at the last minute. The ability to throw together an impromptu presentation used to be exciting when you were allowed a little creative liberty. There's very little of that now, in fact Bible Readings™ are just that: READING, without commentary. Public Talks™ have a very strict outline that must be followed - no creative liberty there anymore either. I'm not dogging you, really, but most JWs don't realize that the presentations on the platform are sterile, without any personality injected into them. Your impromptu talks were likely a breath of fresh air in that stale, windowless room.
The problem is, while you KNOW you can be an asset, they don't give a damn about you and your ability to be an asset. If they wanted to groom you to be an asset, why are they treating you like a leper?
The thing is, you can very likely be an asset anywhere you go. You have the drive, the intelligence and the tenacity to do it. You can do lots of great things in your life, for your benefit and for the benefit of others. You will probably have to choose between being an asset outside the JWs and being an asset inside the JWs. But read through the experiences of other people here, people who were real assets in their congregations, people who stood up for what was right, and see what the local Elders™ and the Congregations™ that they were such an asset to put them through. Our stories are all very similar, in that the WTS used us up and then when we needed help, encouragement, assistance, etc. they treated us like rotten garbage.
I'd personally rather be an asset anywhere else but for the WTS. But that's just because of what experience with them taught me. YMMV
As long as the vessel still sails
As long as the heart still beats
As long as the sun blinks on the blue waves
Have you said: "It is hard!"
Then get this learned
There are many who never a flash of light may have
And whoever said you could take it for granted
that there for you will be only happyness in life
Each time the day has ended
and the stars are lit
Think of all the wonderful things that has happened
And whoever said that exactly you should hear and see
Hear the waves and loudly sing
and whoever said that exactly you should cheer and laugh
and as the seabas rock on the waves
And do you feel the hill is long
then listen to the night wind's song
Horror! Soon the bells toll
for you my friend Ding Ding Dong
As long as the vessel still sails
As long as the heart still beats
As long as the sun blinks on the blue waves
Then you have no reason to complain
Remember, this day will never return
Each time the day has ended
and the stars are lit
Think of all the wonderful things that has happened
And whoever said that just you should hear and see
Hear the waves and loudly sing
And whoever said that just you should cheer and laugh
and as the seabas rock on the waves
As long as the vessel still sails
As long as the heart still beats
As long as the sun blinks on the blue waves
Are there more you will reach
No, try again to understand
That there are many who never a flash of light may have
I am just so confused, because I personally accept the doctrine, but at this time...I do not want to say I support the actions of the borg. I am torn, between two worlds.
