My Letter I'm Out of the Synagogue of Satan

by discreetslave 32 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Found Sheep
    Found Sheep

    Hang in there. I was labled insane for a while too.

  • discreetslave

    I'M NOT CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Since my decision was made in sound mind that made hubby angry. He told me I have to get a job he won't support my freeloading. Any suggestions for work from home?

    The look of contempt from my father-in-law he realizes I could turn his son around and his grandkids may not become JW's.

    I do feel some regret in giving the letter to some older ones. What I don't get is my husband said I was cruel to cut myself off from my friends and commit social suicide.I hurt alot of people. I asked him what is the difference between me taking the initiative and being disfellowshipped because of your practices I have no friends. I asked him can I remain one of JWs if I don't believe it's the truth?, he nor my father-in-law would answer the question. I didn't wait for the inevitable. He said I was disrespectful in going to others in the cong. rather than follow procedure. I took ownership of the decision and I wanted to let others know why.

    A brother just died(unrelated) so now I'm super evil jezebel apostate.

  • leavingwt
    Since my decision was made in sound mind that made hubby angry. He told me I have to get a job he won't support my freeloading.

    Hang in there.

  • Yan Bibiyan
    Yan Bibiyan
    He told me I have to get a job he won't support my freeloading.

    Freeloading?! Really?! Were you somehow pulling money in your bank account on faith in the GB alone?

    Does he come home to a home cooked meal? Does he do laundry, dishes, grocery shopping, cleaning, and a bunch of other things JW (and many other) men take for granted?

    See where I am going with this....

  • snowbird

    Hang in there.

    Seek counseling if needed.

    We're here for you.


  • discreetslave

    Well my hubby apologized he said the freeloading thing out of anger proceeded to make love to me.

    Our relationship is so manic right now. He doesn't know what to feel. This morning he begged me to reconsider. I told him I was taught to stand up for Jehovah and my loyalty is to God & his Son not a man made organization, God as ruler rather than men.

    I keep asking him how does he explain my happiness & peace of mind from the time I stopped believing this is the true religion. I'm more spiritual since not less. I have never felt this complete. So if your views are correct I willingly sacrifice everlasting life for peace of mind and the happiness of my family now.

    Right now in the cong. I have been compared to judas because I hugged & kissed people before I gave them the letter.

    So he is in turmoil

  • leavingwt

    During this transition stage, it would probably be helpful to focus on your family and marriage, and not promote specific religious ideas to your JW husband. If you place yourself in his shoes, imagine how his world has been rocked. Also, as you have probably seen in the past, when one mate is no longer a JW, other people assume that infidelity is involved, even when there is zero evidence of this. Your steady support and love can help to ease his mind that your disagreements are of a religious/faith nature, not a personal nature. Indeed, it's your values of honesty and integrity that have motivated you to leave the organization. Still, this is a LOT for him to process and it can take a while.

  • discreetslave

    Leavingwt- Thanks for the advice I'm trying to be considerate of his feelings. He's said my love & zeal for Jehovah is what attracted him to me. He feels like our foundation is gone since we always emphasized the spiritual. I just want him to know my love & zeal for God & truth is still there just in a different light

  • ultrabimbo

    Hi discreteslave:

    leavingwt has given you some fine council from my point of view. I disassociated myself in July '06

    over the Societies involvement with the U.N. as an NGO and their indefenseable position on child

    molestation in the congregations. They were the two big issues for me. My wife is still a JW and we

    are terminally seperated I think. We were able to stay together for about 4 years as we loved each

    other very much. But being married to an "apostate" is a big burden for a JW to carry whatever the

    circumstances. My wife finally came to the conclusion that I was a imminent danger to her spirituality

    and used this as her basis to seperate from me "in good conscience". I never in 26+ (weeks away from 27)

    mistreated her in any way. I never even made spirituality an issue. I felt I would do more harm than good in

    constantly challenging her beliefs. But in the end I lost out to "the borg".

    As to your letter, it has a lot of scriptural quotations but no application or specificity. When I read it I thought

    it sounded like the rantings of a person who was a card or two short of a full deck. I mean no harm in that comment

    just letting you know how I felt when I read it. Do I think you are insane, no i don't. But to the witnesses that

    you gave that letter, they probably at least considered that as an option. For your own good, I would turn down the

    rhetoric a bit. You can still say the same thing but in a much more attractive package.

    I wish you well in your relationship with Richard. It sounds like you love each other very much. Remember though

    that love does not always win out in this situation. Be careful how you say what you say. Think about how it will

    sound to the JW point of view before you say it. That's all for now. I really do wish you well.


  • discreetslave

    Thanks Frank. You have a point about the letter but what's done is done. I will bite my tongue more I don't want to lose Richard. I will display the quiet & mild spirit hoping for him to be won without a word.

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