Temporarily tired of JW boyfriend. Should I: a) leave

SEL

or b) continue in my plan of eventually getting him out with Steve Hassan's help?

Option B is going to be expensive but not impossibly so. But it would require more patience than I think I have.

I've been writing here and there on this forum. At first didn't want to admit that I have the good old JW-friend problem but now I don't care. He didn't do anything. I'm just tired of him for no reason.

I've read Releasing the Bonds and to be honest I just don't know if I want to put in all that effort. If one person says that helping a friend/relative is one's duty and that I'd be selfish not to do something, then I'd go on trying to get him to leave (in fact I'm hoping someone would say so, because otherwise I don't have enough incentive to go on).

I do love him, most of the time. There was a time when we'd talk about how many children we want and what they might look like.

leavingwt

You could randmonly pick a man on the street, with your eyes closed, and have a happier future, than getting involved with a cult member, IMHO.

Your happiness does not depend on a man, and certainly not a specific man.

There are plenty of fish in the sea.

yknot

Sweety, it is over.....

Let him go, bid him farewell and godspeed....

You will be in the arms of a new lover in no time.....

Listen to your inner instinct (gut feeling) as it is being very honest with you ......this is way more an investment than you bargained for and the end results probably won't weigh the cost.....

Sometimes relationships just fizzle......that is why dating doesn't imply eternal committment.....

You are not selfish, it just doesn't work in the long run.......you would have come to this even if he werent a JW......it just ran it's course....

Maybe do my dear brother a good turn, leave this site's addy tucked away on a book marker in his NWT......

Bid adieu with no mention of religion......you loved him and that was good, you have learned a lot about our lil cult world, take what you have gained and leave the rest to the sands of time....

Be happy and balanced!!!

Ding

I don't think we can tell you what you should do with regard to trying to get him out.

That's something only you can decide.

Found Sheep

I can't tell you what is best for you, but it sounds like you are all ready gone. Staying to get him out of JW's? ut oh

sabastious

Your experience is a good example of how relationships work. We have a biological clock in our brains that "goes off" at certain points and junctures in our relationships. The nature in which this "clock goes off" is unique to the individual and always demands consideration of the relationship's fundamentals.

It's like an accountant that suddenly realzes that he can't remember the last time he balanced his budget. Immediately he pulls out his archives and spreads them across the floor feeling he may have to audit himself.

-Sab

J. Hofer

give him the book (i didn't read it, but i guess it's good), and get on with your life. life's to short to wait for someone. he'll eventually catch up with you or not... live your life, if he's not up to it, don't wait.

jgnat

Goodness, why are you asking a bunch of random strangers if you should stick it out? Your own heart and mind on the matter is what counts. As for love of fellow human beings, there is also the small matter of free will. I married my Jehovah's Witness...eight years ago. He's still happily "in". And I would definitely not have children by him. The conflict would be just too much.

When I've pondered the effort to stick by a JW to see them out of the society, I realized an important question would be, "Would I stay if I knew he/she would never leave?" Answer that honestly, and you will know what to do.

Steve Hassan's book is very good for you. The best book for exiting JW's, I believe, is "Crisis of Conscience."