Never thought I’d be cursing out my Df’d Dad

by lil.lady.03 32 Replies latest jw friends

  • VampireDCLXV
    VampireDCLXV

    So sorry, lil lady. I highly doubt you deserverved any of it at all. I will agree with you and others about this smacking of outrageous hypocrisy. Maybe I'd better not be so keen on meeting other XJWs in my area. Goodness knows how much BOrg influence might be left floating around inside their skulls.

    V665V665

  • Broken Promises
    Broken Promises

    Is this the first time he's known that you've got a bf?

    Maybe he's flipping out that someone is messing around with his "little girl". To him, you'll always be that cute little 4yo in pigtails, and he can't accept that you're now an adult who engages in adult activities.

  • lil.lady.03
    lil.lady.03

    Speak of the devil and he'll leave you a voicemail!

    He just called saying that he's sorry for all that and if he was to die night, he wouldn't want to know that he isn't speaking to me. Yet he still feels that I am making a mistake, but it my life. "Do what you want. Whatever." CLICK

    Too much too soon. Super dramatic. I'm going to bed. Only 6:45pm and I'm drained. Thanks everybody

  • shepherd
    shepherd

    I expect if he was posting here he would have a very different take on what happened. You called him quite a few names and obviously have no respect for him, and it's not something new. Maybe he did not put things very well, and maybe he was genuinely caring about you and your future. You are an adult, so try to see things from both sides.

    "He said, 'Someone has to put you in your place. You think you are a princess.'" - Your post certainly does appear to show you don't like anyone to advise you. Hopefully he is wrong and you will live happily ever after.....if not, at least he tried, even if it could have been done in a better way (I doubt any other way would have got you listening anyway)....

    I expect I will be in the minority, or even the only one to say this, but that's ok. It never hurts to consider both sides of a story.

  • elderelite
    elderelite

    First, if someone asks if you have been having relations all day the correct answers are either A) hell yes (with a big smile) or B) no damn it but theres always tommarow, again with a big smile

    Seriously, it always harder, i think, for gals then for
    Boys. As men most of us grow uo with the idea that we will one day forge our own paths.. It was stunning to me when a friend of mine who us a gal told me she still worries about disapointing her mother... Its just very different.. My dad and i have a very good relationship and at this point he is as likley to follow me on things as i am to follow him.. Just very different outlooks between genders SOMETIMES (thrown in for feminists so i dont get trashed to bad)

    You owe daddy nothing with respect to your life choices. Either he raised you well enough to trust your judgement (dosent sound like the case here) or he gave up the right long ago to tell you what you to do. Either way he has no say at this point. He will accept being in your life on your terms or not, but it sounds like you have a good thing going one way or another. You dont have tell him to f**k off, just live your life well and hell get the message.

    As an aside, i was mad as hell to read he said "ther are no princesses in my family".... Jack ass. I have no respect for any man who would say such a thing. Every daughter should be a princess! Not a lazey selfish princess, but a princess just the same. Screw him

  • lil.lady.03
    lil.lady.03

    oh! @ broken promises: No. He has known about my bf. My bf and I have gone out since July.But hae been dating for about a year before thatm and known each other since high school. We didn't date inhigh school. He had a crush on me, but I was a JW and had no clue he even noticed me. But he is my very, very first official boyfriend. Benefits included too. He's the first guy I really ever fully trusted. I have always had trust issues with men; esp JW boys and men. GO FIGURE?! I guess it can be surprising to anyone that I fell for a "worldly guy", espically one who was in the army. But believe me you I did a complete background check and summary report and scrutinized the hell of him before I got together with him.

    I did kinda take him through hell, since I was still trying to be a witness. I went A-wall for weeks at a time. Be he stuck around and has given me no reason to second guess him. He loves me and I love him. we're planning on getting married. But guess who won't be walking me doen the aile? SMH!! Very sad.

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    I cursed out my own father? Who does that?

    I had to do that last year. I'm a 45 year old married woman, mother of 4 kids and my father tried to overstep. Had to do it. Dad (and Mom) overstepped.

    Here's a hug from MrsJones ((((III.lady.03))))

    You're not a bad person.

  • shepherd
    shepherd

    @elderelite - It all depends on what he meant. In this context it sounds as if he was suggesting his daughter is a bit high-and-mighty and heading for one of life's mistakes. In the end, we all make them though, and he does have to let her make them, just like anyone else. This guy obviously does care what happenss to his daughter - the pity is that is not appreciated. Does this guy deserve to be called the devil and that he is now dead to his daughter? I don't think so. I have to say, adult daughter or not, I don't see much maturity in action.

  • lil.lady.03
    lil.lady.03

    Lord I was going to bed

    @ Shepard: That's the thing. I listen more than I speak. I do take advice and very well. What I do not accept is someone who barley knows about situation to be making rash judgement calls. If they have all the facts; fine then you can offer an opinion. But until that point, hush mode is preferred.

    @elderelite: I agree with what you said about disappointment. One of the resons I never spoke up before about me not wanting to be a JW is that I was afraid of disappointing my mom and family; and at one point my father as well. That caused me not to truely be real with myself.

  • lil.lady.03
    lil.lady.03

    @ shepard: I'm angry as hell with my father. I have been for years. You are right, he does care, but his methods are hurtful. The way he speaks to me, you would think I was a loose woman or a whore. This was not a one time call. Just the first one that we really got into it and I spoke up and crused him out. No father should ever speak to their daughter in that way. But the funny thing is for a long time growing-up I thought that was ok.

    And yes I do thinking highly of myself. I should. I have to do that or no one else will. I'm a good person and I treat others with respect. I deserve the same consideration, esp form my own father.

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