Tower of Babel built by Babies!

by Billy the Ex-Bethelite 54 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
    Billy the Ex-Bethelite

    The weekly TMS Bible Reading assignment is not read, or not carefully read, by most of the sheeples. It doesn't really matter, because the consideration of the Bible reading material is one of the shortest parts on the meeting with a limited number of comments, and those comments are restricted to less than 30 seconds or you will get counselled. Over and over, the dubs are told to read the Bible, yet the organization gives no real encouragement to read the Bible by keeping everyone busy in the recruiting work and using relatively few scriptures in their "talks".

    Why? Why do they spend so little time using the Bible? It's not just that their teachings and authority structure are not Bible based, it's because they realize that careful examination destroys their literalist interpretation of the Bible. It's easier for them to just say, "the Bible doesn't contradict itself", rather than address the cases where their literal interpretation is destroyed by facts.

    One of the facts for me that destroyed a literal interpretation of early Bible accounts and moved Bible chronology into the category of "fiction", was the story of the Tower of Babel. Just one problematic fact was clearly understandable, but completely ignored, by the recent weekly Bible reading assignments. While going through the family records and looking at the information in Insight, it becomes quite clear that the Tower of Babel incident occurred only about 100 years after the flood. And if Peleg (?) was named AFTER the confusion of languages, there was only 70 families on the earth. And if you follow the Bible record exactly, those 70 families would have been scattered among about 8 cities that had already been named. There is no way for this to be at all in the realm of reality. At the supposed time that Nimrod was establishing an empire, it would hardly have amounted to more than a small village. And if you try to used the Bible records of lineage and years involved, then somehow work the math for an ultimately fast growing population, the vast majority of that population would consist of babies. The adults would spend all of their time just trying to care for the needs of all the babies.

    In conclusion, a literalist interpretation would demand that the Tower of Babel must have been built by an army of babies, because Bible chronology is perfect. And it was probably called Tower of Babel, because the babies would babble while building. For that matter, the tower was probably constructed of dirty diapers.

  • notverylikely

    Billy Billy Billy....just liberally apply the word "evidently" to any fucked up explanation you can think of and the answer becomes clear.

  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
    Billy the Ex-Bethelite

    "Evidently" Moses didn't pay attention during Egyptian math classes.

    But then that raises the issue of how the Hebrews increased from 66 souls to 600,000 fighting men in about 200 years. During the exodus, Pharoah was evidently able to track the fleeing Hebrews by following the trail of thousands of dirty diapers.

  • Leolaia

    It took me a while to realize that this wasn't a workable scenario.

  • Open mind
    Open mind

    Billy the Ex: "Just one problematic fact was clearly understandable, but completely ignored, by the recent weekly Bible reading assignments."

    Dear Brother Billy, I'm reporting you to your TMS Overseer.

    We haven't been in Genesis since late 2009!

    Oh well, when you start missing lots of meetings, (like our family) time really flies.

    Enjoyed your post, BTW.


  • Satanus

    They built it w legos. Babies love building w legos, and they can make anything w em. It was only a few feet tall, but as far as the babies were concerned, it went up there into the heavens.


  • Broken Promises
    Broken Promises

    LOL, I like Satanus' explanation.

  • Crisis of Conscience
    Crisis of Conscience

    Billy the Ex-Bethelite said, "because the babies would babble while building."

    LOL Try and say that ten times fast! I love it!

    But seriously, are you trying to confuse me? Oh wait......I'm already confused about MANY things in the Bible.

    Great thread!


  • aSphereisnotaCircle

    Back when i believed and also still had respect for elders, I asked an elder about this vary issue, I think i was about 13 or 14.

    The elder completely dodged the issue all the while chuckling about what a cute question I asked. He went and told a couple of other people about it and they thought it was an adorable question and they chuckled along with him.

    I guess i was a pretty serious kid because I saw no humor in any of it and just steamed in silent anger at them.

    They couldn't explain it, but they could demote the issue to mere childishness and not worthy of consideration.

  • Heaven

    They built it w legos.

    Satanus, are you sure? I don't think Lego was invented back then. I think it was built out of Meccano.

    Meccano Tower

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