Get the elders to leave me alone!!

by bottleofwater 64 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Nickolas
    Nickolas

    Are you trying not to get DF'd? Whatever gets me out with as little stress and anxiety as possible

    I'm sure you are aware, bottleofwater, that you will indeed be DF'ed if you leave with a bang rather than fade away. If you are DF'ed you will put your parents in an awkward situation of choosing between you and the WTBTS. From my admittedly limited experience I can tell you this will result in a world of hurt for everyone concerned, you in particular. Keep your temper, be deferential and respectful, but stand your ground. You want a little time to think about your path in life (no need to say 10-20 years should be enough) and you will ask for input when you feel the need. Remember that the objective is to be left alone, not to go to war when you cannot win.

  • nelly136
    nelly136

    as youre only away for the week, they'll just get you when you go home.

  • Mad Sweeney
    Mad Sweeney

    Think.

    Do you have a job? If not, get one asap.

    Do you have any non-JW friends or relatives who may take you on as a roommate, even if only temporarily? If so, explore the possibility. If not, go to a college campus near you and scour the bulletin boards. There are always people looking for roommates.

    You may not be ready emotionally to go there but you may want to contact your local LGBT association. It is REALLY HARD to leave the JWs when you have NO normal friends outside the Borg.

  • bottleofwater
    bottleofwater

    I agree. And I am currently in college. It's just when I'm not in college, that I have to deal with it all.

  • minimus
    minimus

    Best thread title in a while! lol

  • oldlightnewshite
    oldlightnewshite

    In the short term, you don't want anything screwing up what you're doing at college, right? I think what I'd do first off is prepare a safety net. As long as you get a job, you'll be able to pay for a room and your bills. Whatever they've got in store for you will come along one way or the other. You might handle it excellently and still get boned at the end of the day. Plan for the worst case scenario, and run over in your mind what they might accuse you of, and how you'll answer. If you're not used to it, get ready to lie like a bastard. You'll need to.

  • bottleofwater
  • Balsam
    Balsam

    Bottle of Water,

    Your living with your parents, its their home your under their rules. Your 19 you have your own ideas and you need to be working on getting out on your own. Be respectful if your needing to return to your father's home, he pays the bills, he puts the roof over your head. I know your all ready to sprout wings and fly and live your life as you see fit but you can't do it and live with your Dad. You understand honey????

    When I left my children's father my oldest son who was 18 continued to live with his JW Dad, he soon learned his Dad had rules for living there and he wasn't willing to follow any of them anymore. He was forced to move out and his Dad went on a campaign to bring him back to the fold or be df'ed. Fact was my son could not be himself at his Dad's house so he moved out. I hope you've got a job and do that too.

    a Mom

  • bottleofwater
    bottleofwater

    Ok. Today they interrogated me. We talked a bit first then they said that since I'm not being open that they'd ask me questions.

    One of the elders outright said that I'm a liar.

    Then came the questions:

    "Do you watch gay pornography?" - I said "Yes" after panicking, knowing that a lie here would be obvious because they saw me panic (TRUTH). They said "How often?". "Only a couple of times when I started questioning my sexuality." (LIE)

    "Did you masturbate?" - I said "Yes, after." (TRUTH)

    "Did you ever experiment with your sexuality?" - I said "No!" - ASKED TWICE!!!! (LIE)

    The second time when one of the elders asked me the last question, he also said that if I confessed "it doesn't mean that you will be disfellowshipped". (LIE)

  • bottleofwater
    bottleofwater

    Oh and yes, this was here in Brooklyn. What nerve!!

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