by bottleofwater 64 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
Oh crap....
If you plan on returning home....
Tuck tail between legs...
Accept your position and what is expected of you so long as you are under his roof......
sucks but that is called respect.
you will expect the same of your children later in life too.
Next time make sure you have a the capability to leave and not return ...(college dorm, military unit)
Don't know your situation. Ypu moved in with an uncle, he a jw? Now the elders want a sit down. Tell them sure, you'll speak with ONE of them. not two, or three, ONE ONLY. Then use some of the advice you've been given here, whatever fits the situation best. They don't own you, anymore than your parents do.
Wtf are you living at home for? Your 19 get the hell out and get a life! Stop whinning and go off to college. Once they see the pics of you drunk and in a mad orgy on fb they will leave you alone.
" Stop whinning and go off to college. Once they see the pics of you drunk and in a mad orgy on fb they will leave you alone."
That's the Watchtower view of furthering you education, are you still a JW ?
There is no short term solution to this. You need a long range plan.
It's easy enough to say, "Leave home" but if you don't have a good job or a decent place to go, it could actually be worse than staying and learning to deal with some adversity. And learning how to deal with adversity isn't a bad thing. It's a good life lesson. Of course, OTOH, you're never going to win any debates or arguments with a hard-core believing JW. But you can learn to co-exist together under one roof, until the time you decide is right for you to move on.
You're 19. What about college? Or even a local community college? While living at home even? This may mean a certain amount of duplicity on your part. This is the part about dealing with adversity. You know that JWs are zealots and can be unreasonable. You have to play the game a litte to keep your dad off your back while you continue to work your long range plan.
Once you get the degree and get off on a career path, you can find your own place to live, get out from under and then live your life on your terms. Even then it creates a new set of problems, because parents will always be parents and think they know what's better.
And to repeat...you're 19. As much as you don't want to hear this...you're not all grown up...yet. The fact that you're dependant on your dad or uncle for a roof shows you're not ready to tackle the world all alone. And even though you don't realize it, you have plenty of time to get where you want. Youth is always so impatient. Lean patience and outwit your opponents through time and planning.
Good luck to you...
Whatever gets me out with as little stress and anxiety as possible.
Then just leave. If you want out, just do it. Don't have a place to live? Work? Think of joining one of the branches of the armed forces as moshe suggests.
Your asking how to get the Elders off your back .....and your Dad is one of them, the COBE . Well to be honest you joined their little club when you decided to be baptised ...now you are expected to follow the 'club' rules . Since you depend on your Dad for support and live in his home You must play by "His house His rules " .You can not get them off your back until your a capable adult independant of others support .
Still, you can keep SOME things to yourself . So tell the Elders you will talk with them again once your back at your Dad's .Until then just don't answer their phone calls and don't answer the door .
While you live with your parents you will have to go through the motions of heeding counsel .Be respectful of their wishes it is only a short time before you will be on your own anyways . Because if you don't..... you have the very real possibility of being kicked out ,believe me I have seen it happen .
If you chose to be defiant there can be judicial ramifications . Even refusing help from the Elders can be seen as disrespecting the Elder arrangement ,so watch your step very carefully young man . If there is any punishment like df will your parents still let you live at home ?
Better to be cautious and patient like 'undercover' advised .
Just leave - all the pussyfooting isn't going to help you any, it may prolong the inevitable but that can cause stress and you've said you don't want that.
Are your parents the type to kick you out of home? If so find friends/family that will be willing to take you in, if you're working you offer them something financially even if it is small amount for now.
If not then ask them to respect that you no long wish to be a JW and you are ok with the consequinces. Always however respect them and their home.
Invite your uncle to your parents house for a week.
