Most of us here know what a hypocritical, backstabbing bunch of gossips many of the JW's tend to be. Far too often, a JW wont tell you to your face what's eating them, but they'll sure tell others. When I started waking up (the second time around) this made me very paranoid. Here is an example of what happened to me. I'll admit that it's probably kinda lame, but I'm posting it here 'cuz, um, you know...
It was a couple of summers ago when I was hanging with a certain young lady I liked as well as her friends. I was at her new place, helping her and her grandma finish up the move-in. After the work was done, we talked, we bantered, we had refreshments, etc. Before long we decided we would go see a movie, but they were invited to dinner somewhere else that evening. We made the arrangement that I would head off on my own dinner thing, that we would re-convene at her house later and she'd call up her girlfriends too. Then when we were all gathered we'd all go. It seemed kinda like a first date. I made one little boo boo though. I thought I heard her say that she would call me after such-and-such a time and then I could head over there myself. I went home to eat and then I headed downtown where I stumbled upon a performing arts festival that happened to be there. It was kinda loud there with all the music and dancing and drums etc. I was checking it out and almost lost track of time waiting for her to call. Eventually she did call and was wondering why I wasn't there yet and what was all the noise. - Huh? I thought I was supposed to wait for the call. Nevermind. - I raced right over, and there she and the girls were waiting. I apologized profusely and afterward I drove us all to the theater and we did the movie thing. During and after she seemed sort of upset, cold and distant. Was it only because I made her wait? I didn't want to force the issue. I dropped her and the girls off afterward.
As time went on, I wanted to make things happen, right? A day after one visit I made to her place, she sends me an email about her only wanting to be friends and stuff about how it wouldn't work out between us. No real explanation. - OMG! That hurt! - I wanted answers but none were forthcoming. Things fell apart for me after that. Later on her grandma told my mom some of the girl's reasons for not wanting to date me. She said I was controlling, bad tempered and so-on and so-forth. WTF? We weren't really dating at all! I didn't get that chance! OMFG. She's nuts. That really threw me for a loop. (Me and my folks had a huge fight over it too.) This is a little bend in the river though.
Now, here's the kicker: A couple weeks later an older sister asks my mom if I had been at a bar. WTF? The sister explains that the girl's grandma told her about the movie night thing, about how the girl sat there waiting and upset because I didn't come at the arranged time, about how she called me up and heard all the noise in the background and thought I was partying it up at a bar and lying about it! I was at an outdoor festival, not a bar! I told them so! When my mom told me about that I just about hit the roof. It all came together then. She and grandma thought I was a potentially controlling, unreliable, abusive, lying, alcoholic party animal and therefore not good husband material.
Post mortem thoughts:
1. Even IF I was at a bar, whose business was it anyway? I've been to friendly neighborhood pubs with fellow JW's before. 2. Not all drinking establishments are "bad". The GB and the elders they control are full of shit. 3. Folks don't usually got to watering holes to do "bad" things with bad people. I repeat: the GB and the elders they control are full of shit. 4. The report of me being at a bar was an outright lie! Assumptions people make are a bitch sometimes.
This is totally stupid, right? It makes me wonder what other shit people were talking behind my back. They most likely still are.
So, what's your story? The juicier the better!
V665