by miseryloveselders 44 Replies latest jw friends
miseryloveselders - hang in there bud, being still "in" is tough as it is, being an elder still in and knowing what you know now, is just well, I have no idea how that must be, but I have a ton of appreciation for you and respect. I wish there was an elder in my congregation that was "aware".
Keep soldiering on my friend. I hope that one day you can break free from the WBTS, hell, I hope that I can do that myself!
FinallyFree, you are one awesome, funny dude!
The nurses didn't think it funny when I pulled the needle out of my vein. They had me full of blood thinners, and I made a hell of a mess.
W
In my case I had found out a lot just using new and old jw publications and talking to older jw relatives. What I found out was that I was not the only one who knew these things.
I was not alone.
After 9 years, many points are old but there are still fresh points that pop up every month.
My wife and I left pre-internet. We spend HOURS in the library pouring through information. I started a writing a book, but lost interest after about 100 pages. A few years later I took it up again. It is now the novel I'm trying to get published. Eventually, the obsession slowed down some.
Like JeffT I also left pre-internet. I connected to other ex JW's by means of a phone tree. I would spend a lot of time in Edmond Gruss'* extensive library of Watchtower literature. My obsession lasted for years. Even after it died down, it would flare up occasionally for a short while. It's been a few years since it's died down for good.
*Author of several books against the Jehovah's Witnesses.
Villabolo
Welcome back SD-7!
Yes i did go through a period of obsession when i woke up. Thought i was having a nervous breakdown, really scary period for me initially. All the mental energy and emotions took a toll, like FF I had a health crisis. Sought out some help and now I fine. I'm still in research mode. But it's not WT focused. As a fader with hardcore dub family, i keep up with all the new stuff.
You are normal. Because of knowing what you know, everything printed in the literature is called into question. Every statement made from the platform or from trusted family is not taken as fact. So you're turning all of this stuff over in your head trying to make sense of it. It's overwhelming at times but i think it's a necessary stage until you are convinced in your mind and heart what the real truth is.
As a born-in, letting go of all of that was HARD. Yes, I did let it take up my every waking hour for about 6 months or so. It's hard to wake up, but totally worth it because you get your life (or what you have left of it) back.
I'm 3 years out, and i no longer obsessively research it all. I do however still get a little sick satisfaction out of finding out new things or popping in here and reading something about a WBTS failing. Its natural, I think, they stole 27 years of my life!
Rob
Rob, I know exactly what you mean.
I know. I've been here just long enough that when the apologists pop up with arguements, debates, info, etc. I'm like:
Already seen it, been through it, top to bottom, inside and out.
