Thanks for all the responses. Worked all night on a floor stripping job - so finally back after a nap ! LOL !
MAD SWEENEY- I'm so happy for you that you, your wife, and child are happier and doing well. Don't berate yourself TOO much for not opening up to the elder in trying to assist him with his own mind controlled state. Your first instinct was right to protect your family and be careful with how much you reveal about your fade. It's a very fine line and balancing act between helping JW's think about mind control and analyze their beliefs while still not outing yourself to elders to get exposed and harassed by them. The longer you' ve been out of the witnesses you'll gain more security and know WHEN to bring up points to JW's. Keep on enjoying your freedom friend. Good for you.
DARK UNCLE- I hear what you are saying. There are good days and bad days for sure after exiting the witnesses. I went through the same the first couple years after leaving the witnesses. So what you are going through is normal. Don't be too hard on yourself about it. It takes time to feel social confidence and social skills once we've been in a " closed society " like Jehovah's Witnesses. Perhaps there are volunteer groups you can get into where you would meet more people. Do you have any non-witness relatives available for talking ? Any FORMER friends you could look up on Facebook that you went to school with before you were a witness ? I recently rekindled 2 friendships with former friends I hadn't talked to in 20 yrs. & 30 yrs. Now- I am close to both of these buddy's . So life can turn on a dime in a positive way , believe me. Don't give up friend !
SCARRED FOR LIFE- Thanks my friend. Yeah, I prefer staying with these topics compared with my more " controversial " recent topics ! LOL !
THE LISTENER- Good points. There is strength in numbers . It's very comforting to see that we are not alone . If we have all exited the Jehovah's Witness cult- we are all survivors and should be supprtive towards one another. You are right- it IS the point of this thread.
SD-7 - That is great that you have read Steve Hassan's books to enlighten yourself on mind control. It will help you understand WHY your JW wife treats you the way she does. If she KEEPS treating you in a negative fashion - in time only YOU will have to ask yourself " What causes me to let her keep abusing me emotionally ? " Since you've gone to a therapist - I'm sure they have talked with you about this and revealed things to you. Would it be possible for your wife to go with you to marriage counseling ? I know MOST JW's won't agree to go to marriage counseling- my 1st wife wouldn't go- ( a JW I was married 19 yrs. to ) - that being said - if your wife continues to ignore HER part in hurting your marriage , the long term prognosis will not be good. I'd try to influence her to go to couples counseling. Don't keep berating yourself with guilt - you are not to blame- it is not wrong to desire freedom of mind . The reason you have that guilt is it was instilled in you as a JW. I had it too at one time- even AFTER exiting the cult. And fear also . There is nothing to be afraid of . Yes, it's hard to move forward, but staying stuck in a situation where your mate disrespects you and is mean is no fun either. I know- I went through 2 bad marriages. Finally got it right with marriage # 3. Hang in there guy, keep positive - you will make it , but realize staying in a constant emotional rut is not healthy either. Good luck to you, Peace out, Mr. Flipper