Quick one-liners to explain why you haven't been to meetings

by gubberningbody 71 Replies latest jw friends

  • MsDucky

    I had a contagious disease.

  • Holey_Cheeses*King_of_the juice.
    Holey_Cheeses*King_of_the juice.

    As a chronic meeting misser in my last days (see, I really was living in the 'last days') of the cult, I do not recall anyone ever asking me that question, and, as there is absolutely no chance of ever being asked that question in the future, the best I can only do is surmise what my response would be, and, all I can up with, based on my experience with those idiots is -

    "Do you really care? Well, I don't, and it's none of your business - so just piss off!"

    Cheeses. The loving one - not to be confused with that other bastard.

  • AnnOMaly

    I love the 'I'm simplifying my life' and 'I was present - just invisibly' ones!

    Like ssn587, if anyone said they missed me at the meetings, I'd answer, 'Try aiming better.'

  • RR

    "Do I know you?"

  • ziddina

    Hah!!! I love Heaven's response... "I no longer choose to marinate in an atmosphere of gloom and doom..." [something to that effect...]

    Opus92 - "I've been busy practicing witchraft and becoming a lesbian." GREAT!!!

    MsDucky's responses were also great! I'd like to take this one, " I had a contagious disease.." and turn it into this: "I think I've picked up a contagious disease - I've been reading old WTBTS literature and now I have DOUBTS!!!"

    Zid winking devil

  • snowbird

    Jesus of Nazareth said, "Where two or three are gathered in My name, I'm there." Think about it!


  • chickpea

    i actually used this one with the "concerned"
    members of a car group (the last one to stop
    by with an invite to memorial 2008! go figger!)

    my family is doing so much better since we
    no longer marinate in a doom's-day atmosphere...

    the ensuing silence spoke volumes

  • Meeting Junkie No More
    Meeting Junkie No More

    Syl, I love it! EXCELLENT

  • snowbird

    I got a life!


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