How did you find the strength to leave?

SAHARA

To all of you ExJws, I'm sure you've been asked this question one way or the other many times and I'm sure the answer is different for many of you, I'd like to know directly from you never having a chance to hear or read many ExJW's answers to this. Knowing that you would be cut off from your family and friends and other consequences for your decision to leave, how did you ever get the strength to do it? I mean really, I find it fascinating to know that there are so many of you who were at one time very devout, if not at the very least loyal to one of the most successful mind-contol Organizations ever who believed all if not most of what the Society taught and still you found the courage to risk everything once you accepted that it isn't what it claims to be. Whether you converted to another faith or became agnostic or atheist, I'd like to know how you managed to stay sane while changing paradigms and your world view.

aSphereisnotaCircle

As indoctrinated as I was, I still am surprised that i ever achieved the ability to leave.

Honestly, it's my proudest achievement and i doubt very seriously that I will ever be able to top it.

It was a long, long road out, but what finally gave me the strength, was the day i realized that my children was going to have the same kind of life as mine. And that was not acceptible to me.

You could treat me like shit because the GB trained me well. But I was not going to tolerate my children being treated that way, there had to be a better way, and I started searching.

Lozhasleft

I would never have chosen to leave ...never...I confessed a fairly minor sin to the elders..looking for help..and within days there was a JC and I was disfellowshipped...such a shock, devastated me completely, but then I had to examine how that could happen when I KNEW I was repentant...and it made me so ill ...emotionally and physically...I'd known for a long time that these things happened to others and that many or most of the shepherds were not kind and merciful...but still..it was a shock...and afterwards despite my attempts they refused to try and understand how I felt. How could I go back for reinstatement knowing that their processes werent theocratic in any way? Knowing that they dont show Christlike qualities? ...I could never trust them again...

After much suffering and abandonment including losing all of my five adult children and many friends from over 30 years of faithful service...I chose to move on with a new life...and after some years I started to research ...wow...there was a shock...I suggest you read Crisis of Conscience to get a good idea of what we're up against...and now I am just so sad that I lost so many valuable years in the organisation and ultimately my family too. Thats not love..its not Christian...and it doesnt require strength or rocket science...

By the way..welcome Sahara ..there are some wonderful people on this board with good advice and caring help...avail yourself of it if you need to...and I wish you well...

Loz x

Nathan Natas

I was a "deeply dipped Dub" until I decided I'd rather make my own mistakes instead of the mistakes of the moron sitting next to me.

Then I grew a pair and left.

AK - Jeff

I am not courageous. But I can't tolerate lies and duplicity. I saw it, not as a choice, but an obligation. Once I knew it was not the 'truth', no matter the consequences [and there has been some of that], I had to never return.

Bitter-sweet freedom.

Jeff

Found Sheep

I was a quick fade... I spent 3 months far away from people that knew me. I didn't go to any meedings or read any JW literature I had no TV or internet... I just worked and "thought". I gave myself time to think... Next big step was reading "COC" and then Steven Hansen's books.... It took about 2 years to feel 100% free! the emotional strain and the shunning from friends and family is hard! now... today i ran into a JW that knew me and she looked scared and I found it funny!

yknot

I am still in the process......

My awakening and eventual exit will be credited to this forum alone.

I know I am not alone, my being still 'in' is actual a minority.............I know it will all be okay.

It is okay to be a foreigner in my own land.....(culturally speaking)

I have accepted I was raised in a cult and I can do nothing to change this...... I can only simply grow from the experience/

Currently I am still an Arian Xian, I am happy and at peace with this belief..........the rest I am still privately exploring.

I discern that I will not find all the answers, not having all the answers is okay too.......

SAHARA

lOZHASLEFT SAID - "After much suffering and abandonment including losing all of my five adult children and many friends from over 30 years of faithful service...I chose to move on with a new life...and after some years I started to research ...wow...there was a shock..."

This is exactly the kind of thing I'm so amazed at. Now, maybe you didn't really have much of a choice about how your family would treat you once you were disfellowshipped, I'm still very impressed with how people like you seem to be able to see things as they really are, accept it and move on. Most people I think would do everything they can to be reinstated if only to maintain a relationship with their family. What an aweful thing to be put through... I hope you have found some peace.

happy1975

I had absolutely no choice but to leave. The mind control and restrictions of being a witness nearly drove me to a breakdown. It was then that I realized I needed to research just what I had devoted my life to. Once I realized the lie behind 'the truth' it was over for me. Granted, by loss consists of some childhood friends, none of my family is in anymore. The most painful thing for me is realizing that I spent nearly 30 years devoted to a lie.

Happy

cult classic

I don't know if we were strong. We just couldn't take it anymore. Actually we left after a breakdown of sorts. Our real strength came after we gave ourselves some breathing room from everyone and everything JW related. It was the best thing we ever did for ourselves.

How did you find the strength to leave?

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