COMMENTS YOU WILL NOT HEAR AT THE 01-31-10 WT Study (November 15, 2009, pages 24-29)(GOOD MANNERS)
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DISPLAYING GOOD MANNERS AS MINISTERS OF GOD "Become imitators of God."--EPH. 5:1
OPENING COMMENTS
Notice how the WTS avoids this scripture because it says "Christ."
New King James Version (NKJV)
1 Corinthians 11:1
Imitate me, just as I also imitate Christ.
START OF ARTICLE
Q 1, 2. a) Why are good manners important? (b) What will be discussed in this article?
CONCERNING respectful conduct, author Sue Fox writes: "There's no such thing as a vacation from good
manners. Politeness works everywhere, all the time." When people make a habit of being courteous,
problems with others are minimized and often disappear. But the opposite is also true. Treating
others in an ill-mannered fashion leads to conflict, resentment, and sadness.
COMMENTSSo who is Sue Fox?
http://books.google.com/books?id=HGno_t1crwwC&pg=PA1&lpg=PA1&dq=%22There's+no+such+thing+as+a+vacati
on+from+good+manners%22&source=bl&ots=y9Qf4GENrF&sig=E94nJwdPajqsFGwTMGtMAB3gX2A&hl=en&ei=pgZjS7yxH4
TYNcyHkewG&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=3&ved=0CA0Q6AEwAg#v=onepage&q=%22There's%20no%20such
%20thing%20as%20a%20vacation%20from%20good%20manners%22&f=false
Do you think the WTS is commenting on the fights and screaming matches between elders behind closed
doors?
2. Good manners generally flourish in the true Christian congregation. Still, we must guard against
adopting the bad manners that are common in the world today. Let us see how applying Bible
principles in the matter of courtesy can protect us in this regard and draw people to true worship.
To understand what displaying good manners entails, consider the examples of Jehovah God and his
Son.
COMMENTSDo good manners really "flourish" at the KH?
The WTS demonizes non-jws by saying "bad manners that are common in the world today."
true worship--only jws
So jws don't know already know what showing good manners means?
Jehovah and His Son--Examples of Good Manners
Q 3. How can we imitate Jehovah when others speak to us?
3. Jehovah God sets the perfect example of courtesy. Despite his high position as Sovereign of the
universe, he treats humans with great kindness and respect. In addressing both Abraham and Moses,
Jehovah used a Hebrew term often translated "please." (Gen. 13:14; Ex. 4:6) When his servants commit
errors, Jehovah is "merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abundant in loving-kindness and
trueness." (Ps. 86:15) He is far different from some humans who explode with fury when others do not
meet their expectations.
COMMENTSDo elders show courtesy or are they demanding showing up for "shepherding calls" unannounced and then are irritate when the "sheep" are not available?
some humans--non-jws only explode in fury
Can any remember the CO, DO, Bethel brother chastising them?
Q 4. How can imitating Jesus' courtesy improve our relationships with others?
4. God's good manners are also evident in the way he listens to humans. When Abraham raised
questions regarding the people of Sodom, Jehovah patiently answered each one. (Gen. 18:23-32) He did
not view Abraham's concern as a drain on His time. Jehovah listens to the prayers of his servants
and to the cries of repentant sinners. (Read Psalm 51:11,17.) Should we not imitate Jehovah by
listening when others speak to us?
COMMENTSOT--Abraham, do jws today converse with God as Abraham did? There is no direct conversation; in
fact it is a challenge to know God's reponse.
Do elders make people feel they are "too busy"? a drain on their time?
Q 5. What example of courtesy has Jehovah God set?
5. Among the many things that Jesus Christ learned from his Father was courtesy. Although his
ministry at times placed great demands on his time and energy, Jesus was always patient and kind.
Lepers, blind people reduced to begging, and others in need found Jesus ready and willing to help
them. He did not ignore them, although they came to him without an appointment. He often stopped
what he was doing in order to help a distraught individual Jesus was extraordinarily considerate
toward those who put their faith in him. (Mark 5:30-34; Luke 18:35-41) As Christians, we follow
Jesus' example by being kind and helpful Such conduct does not go unnoticed by our relatives,
neighbours, and others. Moreover, such conduct glorifies Jehovah and brings us happiness.
COMMENTSThe people today that equal lepers are those with HIV and AIDS. I knew several elders who would not
shake hands or touch such people even assigning them a "special" to sit.
So are non-jws impressed? Isn't Jesus to be glorified?
Q 6. What example of warmth and friendliness did Jesus set?
6 Jesus also showed people respect by using their names. Did the Jewish religious leaders dignify
others in that way? No. They viewed those who did not know the Law as "accursed people" and treated
them as such. (John 7:49) It was not so with the Son of God. Martha, Mary, Zacchaeus, and many
others heard him call them by their name. (Luke 10:41, 42; 19:5) While cultural norms and
circumstances may dictate how we address people today, Jehovah's servants cultivate warmth toward
others.* They do not allow class distinctions to curtail the respect their fellow believers and
others deserve.--Read James 2:1-4.
*In some cultures, it is considered poor manners to address a person older than oneself by his first
name unless invited to do so by the older one. Christians do well to respect such customs.
COMMENTSBut does the Bible show Jesus using God's name or referring to his as Father?
Jehovah's servants--only jws
fellow believers--only jws
Most younger people don't call older people by their first names. How much older than we is God?
How much more intimate is saying Father?
Q 7. How do Bible principles help us in showing courtesy to fellow humans everywhere?
7. The gracious way that God and his Son treat people of all nations and ethnic groups dignifies
such individuals and attracts those rightly disposed to the truth. Of course, what constitutes good
manners varies from place to place. Hence, we do not follow rigid protocol in regard to manners.
Rather, we allow Bible principles to give us flexibility in dignifying fellow humans everywhere. Let
us examine how treating people with courtesy can lead to our being more productive in the Christian
ministry.
COMMENTSFor once Jesus is included with his father
Sounds like jws don't have very good manners in the "ministry"?
I have been tossed off the stoop when the jw with me was rude to the householder. How about you?
Greeting People and Talking to Them
Q 8, 9. (a) What habit might be interpreted as bad manners? (b) Why should we allow Jesus' words
recorded at Matthew 5:47 to affect the way we treat people?
8 In the fast-paced life that is common in many places today, two people often pass each other
without saying "hello" or "how are you?" Of course, no one is expected to speak to everyone passing
by on a crowded sidewalk. In many other situations, however, it is appropriate and desirable to
greet others. Is it your custom to greet people? Or do you often walk by without a smile or a
pleasant word? With no bad intention, a person could develop a habit that is in reality
ill-mannered.
COMMENTSI often had jws at the KH pass by without saying "hello" or stopping long enough to listen to my
response when I was asked "how are you?"
Of course, meeting people you know or jws visiting at the KH is not the same as passing strangers on
a crowded sidewalk.
9. Jesus gave us a reminder when he said: "If you greet your brothers only, what extraordinary
thing are you doing? Are not also the people of the nations doing the same thing?" (Matt. 5:47) In
this regard, consultant Donald Weiss wrote: "People resent it when others look through or past them.
There's really”, no excuse you can make that will appease those who have been ignored. The remedy
is simple: Greet people. Talk to them." If we do not let aloofness or coldness on our part chill our
contact with others, we will have good results.
COMMENTSWho is Donald Weiss? Could not find anything googling except a reference to this article.
Do jws really greet non-jws or even jws that are deemed as weak spiritually?
Q 10. How can good manners help us to have a productive ministry?
10. Consider the case of a Christian couple named Tom and Carol, who live in a large North American
city. They have made pleasant conversation with their neighbours a part of their ministry. How do
they do it? Referring to James 3:18, Torn says: "We try to be friendly and peaceable with people. We
ap¬proach those we see outside their homes and those who work in the area. We smile and greet them.
We talk about what interests them--their children, their dogs, their homes, their jobs. In time,
they view us as their friends." Carol adds: "On a later visit, we give them our names and ask for
theirs. We let them know what we are doing in the neighbourhood but keep the conversations brief.
Eventually, we can give them a witness." ToM and Carol have won the confidence of many of their
neighbours. A good number have accepted Bible-based publications, and a few have shown greater
interest in learning the truth.
COMMENTSChristian couple--only jws
Are jws encouraged to get to know their non-jw neighbors, their non-jw workmates, their non-jw
classmates or are they told to limit any contact?
Do these or other jws take these steps to get to know people at their own KH or has 5 years gone by
and they still don't know the names of their children let alone their dogs.
bible-based! publications--why not just the Bible?
Showing Courtesy in Difficult Circumstances
Q 11, 12. Why should we expect mistreatment while preaching the good news, and how should we react
to it?
11. At times, we face impolite treatment as we preach the good news. We expect this, for Christ
Jesus forewarned his disciples: "If they have persecuted me, they will persecute you also." (John
15:20) But responding in kind to disparaging comments does not produce good results. How should we
react? The apostle Peter wrote: "Sanctify the Christ as Lord in your hearts, always ready to make a
defence before everyone that demands of you a reason for the hope in you, but doing so together with
a mild temper and deep respect." (1 Pet. 3:15) Our displaying courtesy--responding mildly and
respectfully--may soften the attitude of those who insult us.--Titus 2:7,8.
COMMENTSWhat about the "impolite treatment" that non-jws get from jws? See Terry's visit from the jws.
How many jws judge non-jws not displaying courtesy showing up without an appointment?
12. Can we prepare to face negative comments in a way that meets with God's approval? Yes. Paul
recommended: "Let your utterance be always with graciousness, seasoned with salt, so as to know how
you ought to give an answer to each one." (Col. 4:6) If we make it a habit to be courteous to family
members, fellow students, coworkers, members of the congregation, and people in the neighbourhood,
we are better prepared to face mockery and insults in a way worthy of a Christian.--Read Romans
12:17-21.
COMMENTSWhat about the negative comments by jws to non-jws, letting them know that they are not part of the
saved group?
I can remember a jw sister who was insulting to her coworkers and judged other jws by her actions.
Q 13. Give an example of how showing courtesy may soften the attitude of opposers.
13 Displaying good manners in difficult situations brings good results. In Japan, for example, a
certain Witness faced ridicule from both a householder and his guest. With a courteous attitude, the
brother left the door. As he continued preaching in the territory, he noticed that the guest was
watching him from a short distance away. When the brother approached him, the man said: "I'm sorry
about what happened. Even though we said unkind things to you, I noticed that you kept smiling.
What do I have to do to be like that?" Because that man had lost his job and his mother had just
died, he lacked all hope of being happy. The Witness offered him a Bible study, which the man
accepted. Soon he was studying twice a week.
COMMENTSWhile this jw may have given the impression of courtesy, he was judging these people as goats.
The Best Way to Develop Polite Behaviour
Q 14, 15. How did servants of Jehovah in Bible times train their children?
14 Godly parents in Bible times made sure that their children learned basic points of courtesy in
the home. Consider the polite way in which Abraham and his son Isaac addressed each other at Genesis
22:7. The good training from his parents was evident also in the case of Joseph. When imprisoned, he
was courteous even to his fellow prisoners. (Gen. 40:8, 14) His words to Pharaoh show that he had
learned the proper way to address a person of high office.--Gen. 41:16,33,34.
COMMENTS Are jw children courteous; I can remember those who ran around the KH, on the stage, and outside,
yelling in a residential area at night. I hated working that territory.
OT--Abraham, Isaac
OT--Joseph
15. The Ten Commandments given to the sons of Israel included this command: "Honor your father and
your mother in order that your days may prove long upon the ground that Jehovah your God is giv¬ing
you." (Ex. 20:12) One way for children to honor their parents was by having good manners at home.
Jephthah's daughter showed outstanding respect for her father by complying with his vow in a very
trialsome situation.--Judg. 11:35-40.
COMMENTSOT--Jephthah's daughter; I wonder how many children would be celibate the rest of their lives
because of a promise their parent made?
Q 16-18. (a) What can be done to teach children good manners? (b) What are some benefits of teaching
children good manners?
16. The value of training our children to be well-mannered cannot be overestimated. To get along
well as adults, young ones need to learn the proper way to greet visitors, to answer the telephone,
and to eat a meal with others. They should be helped to understand why they ought to hold doors for
people, show kindness to the elderly and sick, and offer to help those carrying heavy packages. They
need to understand the importance of sincerely saying "please," "thank you," "you are welcome," "may
I help you?," and "I am sorry."
COMMENTSSo do they see the adults greeting visitors, hold doors for others....
It is not just saying please and thank you, it is not gossiping about others in the congregation that matters.
17. Training children to be courteous need not be hard. The best way is by setting a good example.
Twenty-five-year-old Kurt says this about how he and his three brothers learned to be polite: "We
watched and listened as Mom and Dad spoke kindly to each other and treated other people with
patience and consideration. At the Kingdom Hall, Dad would take me with him before and after the
meetings to speak to the older brothers and sisters. I heard his greetings and saw the respect he
had for them." Kurt goes on to say: "In time, his manners became mine. Treating people with courtesy
becomes automatic. It is not the way you have to act, but the way you want to act."
COMMENTSSo are jws supposed to make friends at work?
18. What is likely to happen if parents teach their children good manners? The children will be
able to make friends and will maintain peace with others. They will be well-equipped to work with
employers and coworkers. Moreover, children who are courteous, mannerly, and upright will bring
their parents joy and satisfaction.--Read Proverbs 23:24,25.
COMMENTSSo what do children see their parents doing? My parents had a KH face and the at-home face.
Good Manners Make a Difference
Q 19, 20. Why should we be determined to imitate our gracious God and his Son?
19. "Become imitators of God, as beloved children," wrote Paul. (Eph. 5:1) Imitating Jehovah God
and his Son involves applying Bible principles, such as those considered in this article. By doing
so, we will avoid the hypocrisy of showing courtesy just to curry favour with a superior or to get a
material advantage.--Jude 16.
COMMENTSA secondary thought is added to imitate Jesus.
So do jws suck up (curry favour) with the PO, CO, DO to get some advantage?
20. In the last days of his evil rule, Satan is bent on wiping out the standards of respectful
conduct that Jehovah has established. But the Devil will fail to eradicate the good manners of true
Christians. May each of us be determined to follow the examples of our gracious God and his Son.
Then our speech and conduct will always be in contrast with the actions of those who choose to be
ill-mannered. We will bring praise to the name of our well-mannered God, Jehovah, and will attract
sincere people to his true worship.
COMMENTSSo is it the devil's fault? Isn't it really the choice of each jw, knowing what the bible says?
true worship--only jws
Do You Recall? • What do we learn from Jehovah and his Son about displaying good manners?
• Why does greeting people warmly reflect well on us as Christians?
• How does being courteous contribute to a productive ministry?
• What role do parents play in teaching their children good manners?
CONCLUDING COMMENTS
I do believe that jws are continuing to be ill-mannered and discourteous in their organization, as
well to non-jws. They are not attracting them. I can remember one bible student who was judging
too slow in getting baptized and the sisters dropped her. They would not even talk to her when she
did come to the meetings. How many people get baptized to be dropped like a hot potato?
Next week....I'm away from my desk right now. Could someone post next week's article?
Love, Blondie