Are these things still frowned upon/banned?.

by zzaphod 32 Replies latest jw experiences

  • zzaphod

    Thinking back, there were a few things I was told then, that now seem rather odd and petty. I was wondering if these thing are common in the WTS or was it just that my girlfriend at the time was a pioneer, and her father was an Elder. (so perhap a bit more "enthusiastic" than others)

    Not allowed to toast the Bride/Bridegroom/Bridesmaids etc at my sister`s wedding (very embarrasing).

    Wedding Anniversary cards could not have pictures of bells/candles/horseshoes etc. (wedding Ann. cards and get well cards were the only ones I can remember you could send).

    Standing in a group outside a restaurant to say grace (rather than privately).

    Not wishing someone "good luck".

    And many others I`ve probably forgot, perhaps others can add to the list.

    In the end, I was running on auto-pilot, so I couldn`t be bothered to question the reasons behind these rules.

    It must be said that although they were "sticklers" for these small things, they had no problem bending rules of the world, ie tax arrangements etc.

    All the best

    Paul UK

  • yippyskippy007

    "Majoring on the Minors"

    You couldn't even say "Bless you" to someone who I say it all the time!

  • teel

    The devout JW for safe measure lives an absolute disconnected life, not doing anything than preaching, going to KH, eating and sleeping (some of them also go to work). The vast majority of things in "the world" is forbidden. The control is very strict, as you said, going into very fine details of how one should live his life - I'd call them techniques to skip on life completely.

  • cantleave

    All of the above are still frowned upon and could get you into serious trouble. C-U-L-T

  • WTWizard

    I have heard from the platform that you can get into trouble if someone tells you "Merry Christmas" (or some other holiday), and you respond "You too". That could be construed as an act of supporting celebration of that holiday, at the discretion of the hounders.

  • zzaphod

    WtWizard, If I remember correctly we were told to respond to "Merry Christmas" with " I hope you have a nice holiday, or break", which only confused those who were not JW`s.

    All the best

    Paul UK

  • HappyGuy

    I sometimes get sneezing fits. People have heard them and thought that a bomb went off, seriously. They come on unexpectedly and there is nothing I can do to stop them, they stop when they stop.

    I HATED when this happened in public when I was a JW. Because everyone would say "Bless you" or "God bless you" and I could not reply and the person's face would turn from a smile to a glare (with the person thinking 'gawddamm jerkoff can't be civil and say thank you to a bless you?').

    We were told that this was a religious rite blah blah blah.

    Now I realize that it is just people being nice to cover up an embarrassing attack with a bodily function. Its perfect. The person who is sneezing doesn't have to feel embarrassed and the person saying "bless you" doesn't have to feel irritated.

    But the WTBTS has to turn this act of kindness into a doctrinal issue. I hate the GB.

  • leec

    I stopped saying "bless you" to sneezing people long before I ever got involved with a JW. It's based on a stupid belief no one believes anymore (I hope), and it's another form of fake politeness. I work in a tech field where many of my colleagues are from Asia ... and none of them say nor repond to "bless you." I really don't see the thrill of being able to say it. When someoen says it to me, it embarrasses me that I sneezed. If I sneeze I jsut want to get it over with ... not call attention to myself.

    Also, anyone in the professional world knows it's very impolite to say "Merry Christmas" to people without even knowing if they are Christian. Again, I work around Hindus, Buddists, Jews, Muslims, etc. Damn right we say "have a good holiday" and not " Merry Christmas".

  • HappyGuy

    ^ I am not a Christain and I love Christmas and I have no problem with people saying "Merry Christmas". I also don't have a problem with people saying "Happy Shiva Day", things like that are not offensive to me.

    I work in professional world too and I have never heard "have a good holiday". And I work with people from all over the world. I guess you are just more uptight than I am. And easily offended.

  • bulgogiboy

    I see where you're coming from Leec, those are good points. I feel exactly the same about saying '(God)bless you' as you do, its an unnecessary practice which comes from a silly medieval superstition. Now, at least in the UK, there's no obligation to say 'bless you', it's not expected of us, although if someone says it to us, it's at least polite to say a quick 'thanks' rather than ignore them. I also stopped saying it a long before the WT got up inside my head.

    However, some thoughts on these petty rules from an international perspective : I spent over a year and a half working in Turkey, and they have a completely different view of 'bless you'. If someone sneezes, there IS a VERY strong social obligation for you to say '├žok yasa!' or 'bless you!'. So much so that people would think you very rude not to say it. I found myself saying it now and again to placate expectant girlfriends, friends, students, co-workers,etc. The same goes for if you sneeze and dont dont make some kind of reply showing gratitude for their saying 'bless you'. JWs were made legal in Turkey not so long ago? The 'Bless you' thing will cause them big social problems on an individual level, and will unintentionally promulgate the idea that as a religious group they are ignorant and uncaring.

    This is the kind of petty little WT regulation which may not seem like a major test of faith to adhere to if you are sitting comfortably in a luxury apartment in Brooklyn, but could impact surprisingly heavily on your life if you are a JW in other countries. What's to say that not toasting the bride and groom in some countries wont cause grave insult and even a danger of violence breaking out?

    These kinds of small-minded, petty regulations, which the WT seems to add to on a regular basis, must be one of the main reasons JWs have such a high degree of mental illness and alcohol abuse issues. You simply cant keep up with them all! I always remember when I was going along, the WT meetings stressing time and time again that 'the yoke' that Jehovah put on us was 'light' we werent bogged down in the same ceremony and tradtion as 'Christendom', hahahahahahaha!!!!!

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