Dear brothers and sisters,
this letter is a further refinement on the letter dated 1/27/2010. In this late stage of the end, how refreshing and comforting it is to know that jehovah's light is shining newer and brighter as each day dawns. Further prayful considerations by the Governing Body has led them to introduce forthwith some new recomendations for trips to the bathrooms at conventions.
It is strongly suggested that each morning of the convention that each member of the family drink two cups of coffee at least an hour before leaving for the convention site. This way, most daily ablutions will be taken care of before leaving your accomodation, or on the way at a conveinient rest stop. This will free up many brothers and sisters volunteering at the convention site bathrooms to be able to take in more of the valuable spiritual food. It will of course also dramatically reduce the costs of toilet paper that we provide and transfer the costs of bathroom usage onto satans wicked world.
Should a visit to the bathroom at the convention be needed, you will need to provide the attendant with proof that it is an emergancy visit and that you did all you could to follow the above recomendations. Never would we want to stumble our brothers and sisters by making casual trips to the bathrooms.
We feel that you will experience Jehovah's rich blessings by willingly following this new directive.