How can you test whether you have broken free of the mind control
It's been less than a year but I think I am nearly there.
I can read through a mag or sit through a meeting and instantly see through the BS.
I can watch the news without thinking is this a part of the composite sign.
I see people for what they are without trying to pigoen hole them.
I'm not worried what the elders think.
I still show too much interest if I see something about a JW in the media.
I notice Kingdom Hall if driving through a new place.
I still want to stop and say hello if I see a group of witnesses on the street.
How do you guys and gals measure the progress of your exit from the cult?
I think we will always be haunted by some aspects of this destructive relgion. Those who were in the longest (46 years for me), will have the most effects. It's only natural.
That being said, what matters is that we woke up and got out.
I drive by a KH about 3 times a week. I look it over, sometimes I think "I wonder if they have security cameras and if they would see me torch the place?"
Other times I drive by and don't even realize I have. Other times I have seen the cars sitting there during the day. All the pioneer vehicles. I feel sorry, then just shake my head. Then I wonder if they have security cameras and if they'd see me torch the place.
So, *I* would say I've broken free.
I agree with Changeling.The longer we are part of the org,the more it become part of our lives.Mind control effects our thinking every day.I would like the good things I learned to stay with me....I would always like to be a Bible reader...but with out something controlling my every move and thought.....What a good question... I'm still trying to brake free.
How I know I'm almost free:
I find myself calling my "brothers and sisters" the "witnesses" now (which I have to be careful of when talking to real witnesses or I'm gonna get caught!)
I find myself rolling my eyes at every service part on how to overcome conversation stoppers
I never bring up any WTS topics when talking to real witnesses because I can't stand to hear about it
How I know I'm still caged:
I am terrified of my elders and the control that I'm ashamed to say they still have over me
When a witness starts talking about the present system of things and how the signs are there, I still find myself kind of believing it
After spending over 20 years in the cult and out for 2 years most days are good. I find that all it takes is one buzz word and Iam back thinking about the JW's. For instance, the phrase we should be mindful. I heard it rescently on TV and I was immediately transported back to a watchtower meeting.
This whole forum is full of people that are interested in anything JW in the media. We post it faster than the JW's hear about it.
Probably most of us "notice" a Kingdom Hall when we pass it. It's something that affected us.
While I don't want to say hello to a group of JW's, it's understandable. The people are not the ones I was ever bitter with.
If you want to be sure you are free of the mind control, break yourself of their language despite the fact that you attend meetings. Instead of calling someone Brother Smith, call him Tom. Instead of saying "preaching" or "field service" say "magazine work" or "door-to-door-distribution." I have better words for it, but "recruiting" and "Saturday morning disturbing work" are a bit offensive to the JW's. Don't call it "the truth." Find other ways to address the religion. You get the idea.
If you still use the term "the truth", you haven't.
If you hard a hard time saying, "good luck", "Merry Christimas", "Happy Birthday" and "God bless America" (or your country's version), you haven't.
If you are squeemish about saying a pledge of allegience to a flag, you haven't.
If you still preface the name of any Governing Body member with the word "Brother" you definitely haven't.
When invited to the Memorial, even if you still "almost" attend, you haven't.
If you believe the Governing Body is merely "misguided", you definitely haven't.
If you miss "the fellowship" at the Kingdom Hall, you haven't.
If a major disaster occurs somewhere in the world, and your subconscious mind pops up with "armageddon", if even for a second, you haven't.
Stuff like that.
I think once you're a believer, your brain is rewired. It'll never be the same again. Once the watchtower bell has been rung in your head, it can't be unrung.
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