my road to recovery, step1...getting my tits out!

by highdose 55 Replies latest jw friends

  • highdose
    highdose

    ...hahaha...not quite what you think;)

    after the lovely encouraging posts i got yesterday. I decided to take their advice and start bit by bit exploring my new free life:)

    looking in my closet i find its full of "modest jw sister style stuff" all buttoned up to the neck shirts etc. I live in a very hot country and those are agony to wear! so i've ditched them, and my necklines have now plumeted by around 20-25cm. its so much cooler and freeing! oh and i've also ditched the ankle length skirts...can't belive i've been trussed up in modest wear for so long!

    thanks everyone for your support, i'm taking one step/risk at a time... now if only i could work up the nerve to go skinny dipping? ( somthing else i've always wanted to do)

    heres a Q for everyone whose left the JW's, when enbarking on your new life, were there any mistakes/ pitfalls you could now warn a newbie about? :)

  • The-Borg
    The-Borg

    Congratulations on your life affirming freedom!!

    Just remember that even though there are a lot of nice people in 'the world', not everybody is so nice. Set proper boundaries and don't accept any behaviour that crosses the line. You should be fine.

  • doofdaddy
    doofdaddy

    Skinny dipping reccommended and a nice naked lie in the sun....

    Any pitfalls? Just take all new decisions with a bit of a think first. Remember, you have a lot of growing to do after being kept in the dark for so long. Just like S Dipping, too much sun first up can burn you so take it easy.....

  • shamus100
    shamus100

    Don't turn into a party girl. Get your mind on positive things and go back to school if you can.

  • undercover
    undercover

    This thread is no good without pics...

  • cognac
    cognac

    I agree with Sham on this one.

  • SnakesInTheTower
    SnakesInTheTower

    highdose...

    welcome to the board.... and congrats on your newfound freedom. It was too early in the morning the first time I seen your opening thread..I went back and read it just now...

    I experienced pitfalls as a recently exited JW...a "fader" who has not attended meetings since Sept 07 or FS since Dec 06.... and is considered "inactive but good standing" (translation: I am no longer counted in their official numbers but haven't been DF...LOL)... I found the freedom refreshing but scary...

    ...it was as if to say: "now what?...I am free, what do I do with it?" The temptation, HD, is to go crazy. DO NOT do that. Take a step back, evaluate your situation with a new set of eyes...eyes unclouded by the constant rules and regulations of a high-control cult (JWs). See the many opportunities but don't try to jump into all of them at once. To do so would be like trying to drink from a fire hose..... yeah, water is good for you, but too much at once can drown you.

    As an example, it took me nearly 3 years to learn to date properly (meaning, not the JW way). I had a few false starts dating in "the world" (ie, eHarmony) but it gave me un-JW experiences with the opposite sex...how to go on a date, how to have a conversation about non-JW topics, etc. I feel bad for the first couple of gals that I went on lunch dates with. lol. Thankfully, neither worked out. When I finally met the great woman I am with now, I was better prepared. Not completely prepared, but better. (as a humorous side note, my GF and I have never been on a formal night time dinner date..and she wants to go, as do I...we just never had the opportunity........so we are prepping for that ..even though we are waaay beyond the formal dating and into the serious relationship stage already.)

    Another pitfall....do not be discouraged if you mentally start to backslide a little into JW thinking....it happens. Around this board, we often refer to the cult of Jehovah's Witnesses as "The Borg" (from Star Trek fame)..and individuals within it as members of the collective that have been assimilated..... in the Star Trek world, if you are one of the lucky few who escape the collective, (i,e. character Seven of Nine, a human who had been assimilated as a child and rescued as an adult), you will still have tendrils of the Witness thinking stuck in your head. Give it time. It starts to go away after awhile.... after nearly 3 years, I still have some remnants of the JW mindset that I am trying to clear from my brain.

    Highdose, I close with something I wrote on this board a few weeks ago about my GF and I....and it applies to equally to you:

    [You] have an interesting journey ahead. The journey is where life is lived. It is time to live.

    Snakes ()

    PM me if you have questions on leaving..I am not an expert, just a fellow traveler on the road with you.

  • rebel8
    rebel8

    I personally never experienced the urge to tattoo "Wild Woman" on my forehead and go buck wild. But that's me.

    Just think about your actions is all. That's my advice.

    (Interesting Google ads on this thread.)

  • highdose
    highdose

    thanks everyone: in answer to a query, i have been through the whole education system, all the way...

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    Congrats on getting your tits out to at least a normal level of comfort.

    My JW wife is very very conservative, so I relate to what you say. She is still judgmental about women showing cleavage at all.

    Just don't rush to be totally opposite of what you naturally are. Be cautious.

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