Is the Kingdom Hall a good place for ugly guys to get pretty girls?

by donny 40 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  John Doe

  The assumption seems to be that physically unattractive people are not marriage material for physically attractive people. While there is little doubt that this is often the case, why does it have to be? Is it not a sad comment on society if we are so shallow as to be oblivious to the fact that compatibility and companionship are often based on qualities that are wholly unphysical? What about

  1. intelligence
  2. mutual interests
  3. mutual world views
  4. just enjoying each others company

  Does one have be physically attactive to share these qualities? I would hope not.
• 

  undercover

  I dunno...seems most of the good-looking "sisters" in my area were not into the spiritually minded. All the hotties married so-called brothers who weren't all that spiritual, but they were all better looking or had a good job.

  Or maybe it was just me...I scared them away...
• 

  leavingwt

  John Doe,

  Ugly people are doing just fine.

  We're everywhere and we're reproducing!

  Your Buddy,

  LWT
• 

  Finally-Free

  Does one have be physically attactive to share these qualities?

  I married for those qualities. It didn't help in the bedroom. We should have just remained friends, and I would have been free to go after the hotties too.

  W
• 

  Spook

  To John Doe, I have to say the OP is a bit unique to the WT. Your four qualities

  1. intelligence
  2. mutual interests
  3. mutual world views
  4. just enjoying each others company

  I think an intelligent JW would either be one who is (a) leaving (b) hiding their beliefs about the fallacy or (c) twisted into elaborate justifications of the JW beliefs. Mutual interests can often be minimized for dubs, since the band of "acceptable" personal interests is very narrow. Certain music - certain movies - certain books...

  World views is obvious for them.

  Enjoying company...hard to test too much since technically they are not supposed to be alone together when they aren't married.

  In the real world, these all do come into play. People vary considerably in who they choose to have relationships with and what qualities are important. But I'd have to say the evidence seems to indicate most of this is not an active "choice" but something more basic, genetic, or early childhood development - for better or for worse.

  I would also point out that many of the hotties left the org young because they had better options. The same applied for many other factors, too.
• 

  jws

  I saw 3 types of pretty girls in the hall:

  One type must have gotten a lot of attention from worldly guys and were more worldy themselves. If they were going to marry anybody who was a JW, he was going to be good looking and/or rich JW and who had a wild side themselves. Or they just married a worldly guy, maybe dropping out in the process. In my area, this was the most common scenario for the prettiest JW girls.

  The other type was the good looking devout JW. They were looking for ex-Bethelites, pioneers, missionaries (probably the only position they'll ever experience), etc. The guys they married weren't always the best looking. And after being at Bethel, weren't always rich either. But usually found work pretty easily from congregation connections.

  The other type of pretty girl might have fit either description above, but her parents forced her into a marriage. There'd be couples and it would be like an arranged marriage. One day a guy would show up from out of nowhere. Somebody spiritual and bland. Then a few months later, they'd be married.

  So if an average looking guy wasn't spiritual, he had to go for the not so pretty girls.

  But, there were some real nice girls who wouldn't make a swimsuit calendar. Probably nicer than many of the pretty ones who were often self-absorbed.

  Pretty? Not so pretty? Downright ugly? Any way you look at it, I'm glad I didn't marry a JW girl now!
• 

  aSphereisnotaCircle

  Just the well-hung ones.

  Now how on earth would a good JW girl know that?

  Even if she got a peek at brother lessthenhandsome's package,

  she would have nothing to compare it to!
• 

  jakmarx

  didnt help me .
• 

  FlyingHighNow

  I didn't see that many ugly guys with pretty girls. I saw some more average looking guys with fair to pretty girls. The thing is, I'm much more concerned with how the religion turned some decent looking guys into boring, arrogant drips. My JW husband was not bad looking, but he was so dull, square and headship obnoxious, I could have done much better dating varieties of men outside the KH. I got asked all the time. At the KH though, I had a child and a divorce under my belt, so I was considered damaged goods.

  On the other hand, I saw "theocratic" brothers marrying homely sisters just because they wanted "capable", pioneer wives.
• 

  mkr32208

  Yup, I've posted about that in the past!