Big Love does the Mormon Temple ceremony this Sunday (page 2)

ninja

btw.....good to see ya here former mormon tom.....hope all is well with ya mate......da ninja......

sacolton

How does the baptism for the dead performed in the Mormon temple?

The LDS temple ceremony has undergone a number of changes through the years. In the 1920's they removed parts of the temple ceremony. (They were having people covenant to kill any of Joe's murderers on the spot.) This was documented during the Smoot hearings in Congress (Congress wanted to investigate Elected Senator Smoot to determine where his loyalties were (church vs state)). Not very timely considering Joe got his a$$ blown of in 1844 and you wouldn't think too many of his murderers would still be around in the 1920's.

In 1985, I got my endowments and went through the temple. There were blood oaths whereby we would swear to keep the sign and tokens secret/sacred - to not reveal them outside the Temple-- rather than do so we would suffer our lives to be taken. Then we would do the handgestures signifying slitting our own throats and later(for a different sign and token) spilling our intestines. Very disturbing stuff.

They removed these blood oaths in 1990. My wife was endowed in 96'. At first, she didn't want to hear me mention such things. She didn't want to believe "the Temple" had such disgusting oaths in it. Now she is a full fledged apostate. I'm proud of her.

BTW The latest I have seen on the DAMU (disaffected mormon underground), it looks like this is real. Several people have said they have verified they have seen the TV guide in question. The episode is on March 15th, not this Sunday. Sorry.

Many are wondering why Barb has a blue apron (it should be green). We wonder why that was done. I don't know why the LDS could claim privacy or ownership of a ritual they ripped of the Masons.

Undercover... Tom Hanks was a very vocal opponent of Prop 8. The LDS were strong supporters of it. Hanks had harsh words against the LDS lately. From what I have heard, he is pissed. Fundy FLDS or LDS... or JW...who cares. If this can help expose the stupidity of cults, great. makes for great entertainment.

It's strange. In my believing days(daze). I would cringe everytime someone "revealed" mormon secrets/temple stuff etc. After several years of knowing the Morg is bullsh!t, a small part of me still cringes when I see the secrets exposed. A much bigger part of me now screams

GO TOM!!

drwtsn32

Thanks FM, very interesting!

FormerMormon

Sacolton,

I did baptisms probably 5 or six times. Some in the Oakland Temple, some in the Washington DC Temple. There is a font of water supported by 12 oxen. You go in with a penishood, er priesthood holder. They have someone else who handles the names and serves as a witness. The baptisor says something to the effect "FormerMormon, having been commisioned of Jesus Christ, I baptize you for and in behalf of Joe Blow, who is dead. In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Ghost. Amen. " He dunks the person. Raises them up and the process begins with the next name on the list. Kids (12-19) are usually enlisted to be the proxy person getting dunked.. a way to get them into the temple thing I guess. Kids usually cycle through 20-25 names or so per session. After this, they get dried off. Another two penishood holders put their hands on you head and vicariously give the dead a blessing, giving them the gift of the Holy Ghost, giving them membership in the church. I could never figure out why a dead disembodied spirit would need the gift of the Holy Ghost? A spirit inhabiting another spirit??? Is this needed in the hereafter???

What's interesting to note is the LDS church REPEATEDLY keeps losing geneology records. My mom had to resubmit our geneology on three occasions. It's not an uncommon experience. I guess they have to cycle the records... if the church members ever suspect that the dead have had their work done, and there is no more need to go to the temple, it would impact their tithing receipts (there is a strong correlation of tithe payers to temple goers).

FormerMormon

BTW, during baptisms, they always separated when girls or boys were being baptized. (DAMN). We would occasionally hear stories of one of the girls who forgot to bring some sort of girl clothing (bra??) to wear under the baptismal clothing. Sometimes things could get perky. They didn't want us boys to see that. Apparently it wasn't a problem for the officiating penishood holders though.

Washings and annointings was another freakish ceremony (also since changed). I got naked and put a poncho on. My sides were completely exposed. They would take water then oil and while praying, wash and then anoint different parts of the body. When I say "wash" what happened is I was dabbed with a finger tip of water. My experience was that I was NEVER touched on the privates. Other postmo's have reported that they were touched on their privates. Enough have reported this that I don't doubt that it happened to some, fortunately not to me.

Women, strangely, do this ordinance on each other, even though they don't have the penishood. No I have not heard of any orgies, nor consummations in the mainstream LDS temples.

Historical records indicate that early washings and annointings involved a tub and was much more thorough, ahem.

drwtsn32

Hey FM, we had a temple built here recently. After it was first built it was open to the public. I heard that after that they rip up the carpet and put new carpet down, etc., and then it's closed to the public. True?

FormerMormon

drwtsn32

You are correct sir.

If I remember correctly, they renovated the Oakland temple, then briefly opened it to the public before rededicating it so as to remove the foul spirit brought in by all you heathen gentiles. I have heard carpets get replaced.

Going to the Temple was kinda like snipe hunting. We would hear all these faith promoting stories of people seeing Jesus or angels in the Temple. Our young suspicious minds would wonder if we were going to stumble upon an angel as we came around a corner or something. Trying to pin a Morg down on documentation for these stories is like pinning mormon jello to a tree. Total unsubstantiated suspicion inspiring belief and shaping young minds.

sacolton

True or False:

Mormons believe Jesus and Satan are brothers?

Mormons believe that the Father has a physical body like a man?

Mormons believe that there are "prison planets" that spirits go?

Mormons believe that Joseph Smith has authority as to who goes to Heaven?

Mormons believe that you become a god when you die?

Mormons believe that the women will have "spirit babies" when in Heaven?

FormerMormon

Sacolton

True or False:

Mormons believe Jesus and Satan are brothers? TRUE. And we are their brothers/sisters too, however we could have cum from different heavenly mothers and one lucky, but horny heavenly father. "Heavenly Mothers" is lightly spoken of, even sung about, but isn't spoken of much more than that. It's a pissing point for feminists in the church

Mormons believe that the Father has a physical body like a man? True, but it is glorified and perfected. Also, the blood has been changed out for something better. I wonder if we are made in God's image, does he have a vestigial tailbone, vestigial 2nd eyelid etc?

Mormons believe that there are "prison planets" that spirits go? I haven't heard "Prison planets". Earth is supposed to be "celestialized" and be the abode for the best of Mormons. The rest of you losers go somewhere else. (They believe in the Celestial, Terrestrial and Telestial Kingdoms whose glory are compared to the sun, moon and stars). Then there's outer darkeness where Satan, 1/3 of gods spirit children and apostates like me will be sent to. They never really gave a physical location for outer darkness or for these lesser kingdoms.

Mormons believe that Joseph Smith has authority as to who goes to Heaven? Joseph Smith and Brigham Young both made bold statements to that effect, yes.

Mormons believe that you become a god when you die? You? No. Me? Not anymore. If an LDS member can jump through all their hoops, "be" the machine they expect, pass judgment, etc then yes they will be a god. Men will have many wives. Wives will be ever so understanding and joyful for this arrangment. If your name is Brigham, you could have wives "by the millions"- his words.

Mormons believe that the women will have "spirit babies" when in Heaven? Yes, Eternally so. Come on ladies. Doesn't eternal pregnancy sound like heaven? Implied in this is the idea that we all have a great great great grandgod in our spiritual ancestry.

Big Love does the Mormon Temple ceremony this Sunday

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