His Excellency, thanks for bumping this thread!
In 2009 Snakes in the Tower wrote:
If you are currently an active Witness but thinking of walking away from the Organization, understand that if you leave that you need to be prepared to go through a rough road . Have a support system in place BEFORE you walk away . Make some "worldly" friends at work or somewhere;, find a therapist if you can; get close to non-JW family...people that you may have looked down on before...people you can talk with....you will need all of them and more to get you through the mental anguish that follows you...especially if you were raised as a JW. It's harder to do after you leave. If you don't you end up being in a "no man's land" for a time. The more time you have invested as a JW, the harder it may be.
People who were as involved as I was in the Watchtower Organization do not just get to "walk away" from the Organization. "Something" must be wrong. The rank and file witnesses can smell it as surely as the smell of death (and that is a smell you never forget) and run the other way.
Snakes, you what you said years ago is still so true. Spot on. I wish I had read this before I walked away. I make a cold, clean break from the WTB$ with no preparaton whatsoever, and I suffered the consequence. No support system, not a single non-JW friend. Unable to reconnect with Non-JW totally dysfunctional family (The Trifecta: mental illness, alcoholism, drug addiction-- The Perfect Storm). Working part-time from home for our family business (my active dub life was a part-time job in and of itself, and I had been my mother's primary caregiver for nearly 12 years at that point (with no family support.) Severe, recurrent clinical depression reared its ugly head after a brief elation upon my exit. I also have PTSD, in part due to the fear-mongering of the early '70s leading up to 1975, but not all dub related.
I had 42 years of my life invested. I raised myself in The Lie from age nine; no other family members go sucked in. I married in The Lie. Raised two children in The Lie. I did end up in "no man's land" for a time, and it was exceedingly lonely and painful. Now 19 months later, I am so much better! Today I had a recheck with my cardiologist. I literally came to death's door due to my exit. I was so depressed that I went back on medicaton. I was having severe adverse side-effects and my M.D. kept increasing the dose, saying I needed to stick with it just a bit longer and my body would adjust. I ended up in the hospital due to being over-medicated. My cholesterol numbers had always been high, but the stress in my life had driven them through the roof. My EKG is still not back to normal even though it has nearly been a year, but my cholesterol numbers have settled; and my cardiologist is happy with the percentages. But the great part about today's visit-- my cardiologist said, "I nearly walked out of the room, I didn't recognize you! You look so different, so much more relaxed and well. What has changed?" I told him everything has changed. I explained that I had been a Jdub for 42 years and had left. I told him that I am now a volunteer literacy tutor and love it. That I am practicing yoga and meditation and I am currently in therapy and benefiting from it for the first time in my life, because I can freely talk about what is really bothering me instead of trying to protect the image of an organization. He said that he sees the same hight levels of stress in the Orthodox Jewish community. (He is Jewish.) He said that the unattainable expectations and standards drive people to the brink. He expressed how very happy he was for me. He asked about exercise, and I told him I just fell in love with kayaking, and my husband has ordered one and it is on the way. He said, "Kayaking is great exercise; I wouln't change a thing. See you in a year!" I love being on the water and in the sun! There will be room for my dog in my kayak (she has a life jacket already for sailing). I have a waterproof camera, so I will enjoy my love of photography while we are puddle jumping. Also, I walk my dog every day, something I never had the time to do as a dub. I would just tie her out. My father and grandmother both died of heart disease at aged 54. I am going to be 55 in July. I'm not certain I would still be here, if I had not let The Lie. I was clearly dying inside. I'm glad I walked away. I just wish I was more prepared for what I was up against. So if any lurkers are reading this, please listen to Snakes. He was right years ago, and he is still right today!
