I Saw My Mother's Time Slip

by StAnn 42 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  burningbridges

  you do what u gotta do, just like they do. Not everyone has it as good as me who has a secret good relationship with an 'in' member who mails me copies of the studies additons. However, if there is anyway u can arrange that, by calling an old friend there (faking new found interest and a desire to study, claiming your mother will not provide u with copies and plead for them to mail them to u) that might work. I was originally told no and not to contact tham anymore but lo and behold three months later the unsigned envelopes started arriving in he mail and keep on coming... I get mine to show my guardian ad litem the college discouragment articles, school activites that are discouraged, ext that are not in the public editions.
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  OUTLAW

  StAnn..Snooping in your mom`s bedroom???..LOL!!..You`ve done two very naughty things.....OUTLAW
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  SPAZnik

  She just said she doesn't snoop. It was a figure of speech. She's just in it for the literature to provide hard evidence of the truth about the troof to her hubby. Is it really "snooping" if her dad knows about it? Perhaps, reniaa, you would be interested in volunteering to provide, up front and honestly, the items of interest. You could even count them as placements. :O)
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  SPAZnik

  There's a time for war. - Even mommy's bible sez dat. :O)
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  BizzyBee

  It's pathetic how JWs pride themselves on preaching when all they do is make it look like they preach.

  every witness knows it's to easy to find silly ways to count your time

  Interesting.....aside from the judgment on StAnn's ethics (which is kind of boring in its tedium) is the real heart of the matter - why and how JW's count time. If you consider that it should be about activities that might result in bringing interested ones into the trap fold - then silly ways to count time is about - what? Staying one step ahead of the wrath of the elders? By comparison, snooping in your elderly, misguided mother's stuff seems as much about monitoring her mental decline and vulnerability at the hands of cultist charlatans as about an invasion of her privacy. Elderly parents should be safeguarded at some point, from those who would take advantage of them.
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  The Oracle

  yes, it is pretty pathetic isn't it?

  The WT is certainly guilty for messing up a lot of minds.

  The Oracle
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  independent_tre

  Before I got baptized, I left the JW's and became sort of rebellious as a teenager and young adult. My mom would attempt to counsel me and I wouldn't listen to any of it. To me it was if she wasn't really trying to connect with me at all, or find out how I felt about certain things and her counsel was always full of quoting one scripture or another. For some reason, I never felt connected to her, only judged by her. When I was going through some issues, I always received some stern WT-ish counsel and she always stated why I needed to come back to the 'truth'. I could never put my finger on why my mother and I never seemed to have a close mother-daughter relationship and why I never listened to her 'counsel' or take the letters she wrote me very seriously. ( The letters she wrote always were mailed to me wrapped around a watchtower or awake mag, and full of quoted scriptures).

  Looking back, I can probably guess why. Because she was counting time. That was always the end goal. Not to help me through my personal problems ( which I had a lot) or even really listen and open up to me ( she rarely did this, and I know very little about her own personal feelings). It was always preaching - WT style. And I'm quite sure she racked this up with all of her other witness activities, including the letter writing. The whole 'counting time' thing is crazy and I would feel very uncomfortable if she did this now, as I'm trying my best to fade out of this god forsaken religion. Counting time was was of the very first things that struck my as very wrong and unscriptural. Those who are devout live their lives by the JW clock and I don't blame my mom, this is all she has been taught - that this is the only way that shows that you love someone, if you preach to (at) them.
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  StAnn

  Okay, let me restate this:

  My father has been married to a Dub, my mother, for so long that he is innoculated to the stuff in the literature. He can't see the forest for the trees. I've provided him with copies of things from the internet about the WTS, which my mother dismissed. In response, my father requested that I look through the material and find things that are incriminating that I can give to him in original form in the original magazines, books, tracts, KMs, etc. So, when I visit my mother, I generally quietly check out her bookshelf in the bedroom where she exclusively keeps WTS items to see what's new and what she may have two copies of and I quietly pocket the extra copy. Also, if I have access to some older materials that she probably wouldn't miss I'll sneak those out also. This is at my father's behest, as he is concerned for the welfare of his wife and family, and these items WILL BE RETURNED TO MY MOTHER when I am done with them. They will be returned to her by my father, who will use them to point out lies and inconsistencies in them, as I find them.

  I do not have an insider source for materials. At least, I didn't. I can't afford to buy on eBay each and every silly piece of literature the WTS produces in hopes that it will have a useful bit of information in it down the road when the WTS gets "new light." My mother considers me an apostate and only speaks to me because we avoid all topics religious. People in her congregation have lost three Bible studies in the last year because I found out about them and spoke to the people who had begun studying, sending them links to tons of info on the WTS, and they dropped their studies like hot potatoes and SHOWED their study conductor's the emails and links I sent them, with my blessing. So the people in my mother's congregation feel very sorry for her, having such a wicked daughter who loses them their Bible studies. My mother knows about my activities and has absolutely no intention of giving me literature to use against her precious organization.

  I have no contact with people I used to know and thus can't get the literature from old friends. Again, I have no way that I know of to get WTS literature, except to borrow it from my mother, and I'm doing what my father asks because he's trying to save what's left of his family. Also, if I did call someone out of the blue after 20 years and ask that they start sending me literature, they would tell my mother and she would start stressing out about having me in her life. The only reason I get to come and go from her house freely is because I do a lot of caregiving for her, which my wonderful Dub siblings won't do. She would be very upset if people told her I was trying to get literature out of them, because she knows what I want it for, and she wants to be loyal to the "organization" yet she depends upon me to do things for her that she can no longer do. I would rather give up the literature altogether than upset her that much.

  I have no regrets about my conduct.

  Reniaa, since you brought it up, you may begin sending me literature. I will PM you my address and you can send it to my husband, who was never affiliated with the Dubs, so it will actually count as a placement for you. You can make an honest woman out of me. LOL!

  I shouldn't have used the word "snooping."

  I don't go through her purse.

  I don't go through her closet.

  I don't go through her jewelry box.

  I don't try on her perfume.

  I don't go through her file cabinet.

  I don't go through her night stand.

  I don't go through her dresser drawers.

  I don't eavesdrop on her phone calls.

  I don't open her mail.

  I don't look at her checkbook.

  I don't look at her other reading material and so don't even know what library books she has out right now.

  I only opened her field service time book to get a copy of a free form provided by the WTS.

  I borrow literature with my father's knowledge in an attempt to help him in his struggle to save his wife of 53 years and the family he loves. Which literature I will happily return, with much highlighting and notes attached, for her edification and hopefully to help her gain her freedom from the cult in which she is trapped. Plus it weirds my husband out to have it in our house.

  Many of the scans of literature we receive here on JWD are from people who are living double lives, pretending to be good Dubs while quietly feeding the "apostates" the fuel they need to keep fighting the WTS. These people are deceiving the "brother's" at the literature counter when they purchase literature, if you want to be technical about it. I see it as a necessary strategy in my battle to save my family. They are "fading" and deceiving their loved ones because they wish to help their loved ones "see the light" and don't want to lose them unnecessarily. The only difference is that it's easier for me because I don't have to live a double life.

  Regarding the note on my mother's mirror, it was taped to the mirror for the whole world to see. Couldn't miss it, didn't go looking for it. Lots of people go in her room, as she can no longer stand up and spends a good deal of time lying down. And I don't think it's untoward to stop and check my hair in the mirror before leaving the room, which is why I noticed the doomsday note she had written.

  And as someone else said, my mother is elderly. She is suffering from an inoperable brain tumor, and had a heart attack 12 days ago. She is not well and will not be around much longer. I think it's tragic that a dying woman is being tormented by messages from a crazy publishing company, telling her to prepare to be persecuted and martyred. My time to help her is short. I will take what I consider to be reasonable measures to help free her from this bondage before it is too late for her, if she's willing to be freed. It would give my father a lot of peace to know he tried his best to open her eyes before she dies.

  BTW, I shared this with a friend of mine, who is Catholic. She said that she thinks my Guardian Angel wanted me to see that time slip book because I need reminders of how much the WTS has twisted my mother's heart and mind, so that I will redouble my efforts to help her. I can get lulled into a false sense of comfort around my mother, since we don't talk religion, and forget just how depraved she has truly become. At those times, I slack off in my "theocractic warfare." Guess it depends on your perspective.

  StAnn
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  StAnn

  StAnn..Snooping in your mom`s bedroom???..LOL!!..You`ve done two very naughty things.....OUTLAW

  Outlaw~Re: #1, I've explained it ad nauseum. Slap my hand, if you wish. Re #2, I'm so sorry! That must hurt! Ouch! StAnn
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  StAnn

  the real heart of the matter - why and how JW's count time.

  BizzyBee -- Exactly! That my mother would wait until the end of the month, see that she had no "time" to turn in, call her own mother who was afflicted with Alzheimer's, and then turn it in as Witnessing for Jehovah, spreading the good news, etc. This is not honestly "preaching work" or "field service." She was never really trying to convert her mother. She was not really concerned with spreading the message or "going forth and making disciples." She just needed hours to put on a piece of paper. And it saddens me because I know that my grandmother just thought my mother was calling because she wanted to check on her. She'd have been saddened to know Mom had an ulterior motive.

  There's also the fact that my mother's health was failing, which was why she had not been out in the door to door work at this time in 2002, yet she is made to feel guilty about this and stoops to using her mother to satisfy the Organization that she's worthy of being retained as a member.

  My grandmother died from Alzheimer's in December of 2006. She deserved better from her daughter. And my mom deserves better from her "religion."

  StAnn