Whats the Craziest thing you've heard a JW blame Satan for????

by superman 17 Replies latest jw friends

  • superman
    superman

    As most of you know, that evil spirit creature known as Satan the Devil is of course after JW's and only JW's. I can remember this middle aged lady at my old hall give a comment on how "Satan works in the most mysterious ways against Jehovah's people, he even has the teachers give out more homework on meetings nights so that he can make it more difficult for the young ones to attend the meetings". At that time I was hardcore in it, and even thought this lady is a "looney-tune". There are millions of students in this country and Satan gives out extra homework just to get back at a few hundred JW kids. Needless to say her daughters must have used that excuse on her because now both of them have left the "troof" (go figure). Oh, and I've got one more, this J-Dub Elder janitor (yeah I know you've never heard of a JW whose a janitor) got fired from one of his cleaning jobs and blamed it on Satan. Apparently he was so excited about going out in service that he didn't turn the lights off or lock the doors at his cleaning job. Well, it didn't take a genius to figure out what happened next. The next day a whole bunch of expensive sh*t was missing from the place and of course he wasn't bonded or insured(I guess insurance is a tool of the Devil) so they (business owner) fired and I think might have even sued him. But of course, it was Satan getting back at him for going out in service, not his own stupidity, that was to blame.Any other experiences to share???

  • stillajwexelder
    stillajwexelder

    A dog barking while going down a garden path to knock on the door as in "That dog is demonized and from SATAN"

  • stillajwexelder
    stillajwexelder

    A pioneer was well down on her hours and the last few days of the month it rained - yes you've guessed it - blamed on SATAN

  • LisaAnn
    LisaAnn

    I was told that sugar was one of Satan's tools.

  • changeling
    changeling

    A yeast infection.

  • DoomVoyager
    DoomVoyager

    Eating disorders are actually caused by demon possession.

  • The Oracle
    The Oracle

    Satan got a bad wrap for a lot of different things.

    A few that quickly come to mind...

    Growing up we had Tuesday / Thursday meeting nights which just happened to coincide with hockey playoff games (Tues - Thurs - Sat) that year. This elder told me that Satan was behind the scheduling of these games on meeting nights. Sheesh!

    Another good one - My mom told another sister about my perfect score in a high school math exam, so this sister proceeds to tell my mom that Satan was behind it (explaining that it would be a lure to go to University). So Satan somehow gave me the right answers to a math test? Was she for real???

    A similar one concerning a young brother who was a fantastic guitar player - a crazy elders wife and I were talking about his guitar playing and she seriously believed that Satan was giving this young brother special powers to play guitar so that he would leave the truth. She heard a scoop that he had kept a KISS albums hidden somewhere in the house after his father purged his room of all his demonized rock music at home so this was obviously the reason Satan was giving him special guitar powers. She was not joking. She was making the point that we have no idea how powerful Satan is, and the lengths he will go to quietly pull our young ones in to the world.

    Some crazy poo poo.

    The Oracle

  • shamus100
    shamus100

    I love these stories!!! Keep them coming!

    Two words: Ouijia boards. As if satan in sitting in a piece of wood with dye on it....

  • WTWizard
    WTWizard

    All the good TV shows coming on Tuesday and Thursday evenings so people could miss the boasting session.

    That people are missing boasting sessions at all. As for me missing them, I blow off the ones where attending them is going to have a bigger opportunity cost than the total value of attending them. And if Jehovah makes sure that I get zero or negative value out of going, I find it an insult to Satan that he gets blamed when I skip them.

  • RubaDub
    RubaDub
    Another good one - My mom told another sister about my perfect score in a high school math exam, so this sister proceeds to tell my mom that Satan was behind it (explaining that it would be a lure to go to University). So Satan somehow gave me the right answers to a math test? Was she for real???

    I bet the answers had a lot of 6's in them.

    Rub a Dub

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